 Soul Bouquet (Revised 27 Aug), Quatern & new title |
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Archives > Archives > ARCHIVES -> Poetry for Crit Prior to 2011  |
 Aug 17 06, 19:09
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#21
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 Mosaic Master  Posts: 18,892 Joined: 1-August 03 From: Massachusetts Member No.: 2 Real Name: Lori Kanter Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Imhotep  |
QUOTE(Rosemerta @ Jul 30 06, 19:28 ) [snapback]80010[/snapback] Hi Cleo  I was all set to do some hacking and slashing and then realized this was written in a form unfamiliar to me so am trying to read up on the other suggestions instead. First of all, I'm sorry for the loss of your friend, even if it was a year ago. Secondly I thought this was a beautiful tribute. It brings forth true sentament. Hi Jackie. By all means, offer what you think will make this a better poem (if the offerings are out of scope to the form, I'll let ya know.  Thank you very much for your kind sympathies, Larry really was a true friend and confidant - he is deeply missed. I'm glad you felt my feelings in this piece, it's hard to get 'deep' for me. Hugs ~Cleo 
·······  ·······"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!  "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner           |
  
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Aug 27 06, 09:46
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#22
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Mosaic Master Posts: 18,892 Joined: 1-August 03 From: Massachusetts Member No.: 2 Real Name: Lori Kanter Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Imhotep |
My first revision is now posted with a new title too.
Thanks all! ~Cleo 
······· ·······"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner |
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| Guest_Cathy_* |
Aug 27 06, 10:50
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#23
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Hi Lori,
I like your revision. The flow is smooth and gentle (if that's possible...). I also like 'Soul Bouquet' for a title, although the one you're using is good as well.  Cathy |
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Aug 27 06, 11:01
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#24
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Mosaic Master Posts: 18,892 Joined: 1-August 03 From: Massachusetts Member No.: 2 Real Name: Lori Kanter Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Imhotep |
QUOTE(Cathy @ Aug 27 06, 11:50 ) [snapback]82016[/snapback] Hi Lori, I like your revision. The flow is smooth and gentle (if that's possible...). I also like 'Soul Bouquet' for a title, although the one you're using is good as well. Cathy Hi Cathy. Thanks for stopping by and for you original suggestion and title. I will modify it now as I too like it more than simply 'Away'.  Lori ······· ·······"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner |
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