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x10 - 2/18/17 - JLY, Dreams, Alive and Well |
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Feb 24 17, 07:00
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Ornate Oracle
Group: Centurion
Posts: 4,592
Joined: 31-October 03
From: New Jersey
Member No.: 39
Real Name: John
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Larry Carr
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Dreams, Alive and Well
The beach was eerie, as still air lingered, in full darkness, no stars could be seen, only a lone moonbeam sparkled on high where ocean avenue met street eighteen.
Its been twenty years since love peaked, on a burgundy blanket we became one, baring our bodies and baring our souls, emotions taxed, promises never to be undone
What the night knew, it wouldn't divulge, the sounds of silence deafening for us both, fear of letting go was a mask we wore, in the damp sand we etched a faithful oath.
Recollections of her snip at my consciousness; What became of that high school queen? Her steel gray eyes and auburn hair, continue to emblazon each and every dream.
Words used (in order of appearance): star, sparkle, twenty, love, burgundy, tax, mask, recollect snip, steel
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Give thanks for your new friends of today, but never forget the warm hugs of your yesterdays.
Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!MM Award Winner
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Feb 24 17, 13:32
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,117
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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Well done, John... and I think you ought to offer this for critique. I thing it's worthy of taking a little more time with it without the constriction of the words given... even though you sewed them in very nicely! ... and of course you've been missed in the critique forums... like a lot of other folks.... hint, hint... deLighting in your sharing, Daniel
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Feb 25 17, 10:20
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,497
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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Hello John,
It is so nice to see you back and answering challenges once more. I agree with Daniel that you should post this for critique. It is a beautiful story and from what I gather, probably true to life.
Mine is a bit shorter and mostly tongue-in-cheek but the idea came from the given words.
Great job,
Larry
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Feb 26 17, 17:32
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Hi John, It's so nice to read your poetry again! I always see a scene so vividly in my mind. Enjoyed this, ~Cleo
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Feb 26 17, 19:02
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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I can do relate!!! Mine was even longer.
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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