Wheels of Change [ Revision #1 ], a Revolutionary Rondeau Options

[JustDaniel]

Wheels of Change

A smouldering... a charcoal fire
that heats great iron hoops for tires
to ring the wheelwright's oaken spokes
on circled pine, for working folks
to move with freedom — their desire.

Their taxing load, it seems, inspires
new ways of commerce and requires
a new restraint, a gentler yoke —
a smoldering.

Wheels turn. Some gentry now admire
their revolution, yet the ire
of governance will steep, provoke
still more rebellion as he soaks
them... takes a powder... leaves his pyre
a-smolderin'.

© MLee Dickens'son 18 July 2006

at the wheelwright’s shop in Williamsburg, VA
near the Colonial Governor’s Palace.

Original

A smoldering, a charcoal fire
that heats great iron hoops for tires
to ring the wheelwright's oaken spokes
on circled pine, for working folks
to move with freedom — their desire.

Their taxing load, it seems, inspires
new ways of commerce and requires
a new restraint, a gentler yoke
— a smoldering.

Wheels turn. Some gentry now admire
their revolution, yet the ire
of governance would soon invoke
new fear, tea-off his subjects, soak
them, take a powder, leave his pyre
a-smoldering.

[AMETHYST]

Hi Daniel,

It is always a pleasure to read your work. As John puts it, you take great command over your forms and work with them as if molding them with your hands. I have not yet done a Rondeau, I find them somewhat hard and you create it as if it is made with ease.

I felt the title was applaudable, brought out minor hidden meanings that I compared with the fiery images. I also thought that the emphasis placed on the 'a' before charcoal was necessary to enhance your intent.

I was a little left confused with 'tea-off ...' but will wait for commentary to see what I am not seeing.

Hugs, Liz