Not Alone *** Revised, Villanelle Options

[Michelle]

Not Alone - Revised

My time is not my own
when siblings seek a hand.
I’ll never be alone.

Our children always moan
for needs and wants expand;
my time is not my own.

My husband takes his throne,
his wish is my command:
I’ll never be alone.

I use a soothing tone;
as Mother’s wits disband.
My time is not my own

when friends decide to phone.
A party urged and planned:
I’ll never be alone.


God’s plan, once dim, now shown;
He gives where life demands.
My time is not my own--
I’ll never be alone.




Not Alone

My time is not my own
when siblings seek a hand;
I’ll never be alone.

The children always moan.
Their needs and wants expand.
My time is not my own.

My husband wears cologne;
we dance beside the band.
I’ll never be alone.

I use a soothing tone
as Mother’s wits disband.
My time is not my own.

When friends decide to phone
our barbeque is planned;
I’ll never be alone.

His voice, once dim, has grown;
God speaks as life demands.
My time is not my own--
I’ll never be alone.

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hi Michelle,

I really enjoyed this! YOu've employed solid rhythms throughout while maintaining your trimeter. I think your revision sharpens your message too, and I'm particular fond of this passage:

God’s plan, once dim, now shown;
He gives where life demands.
My time is not my own--
I’ll never be alone.

No nits!
Enjoyed,
~Cleo