Could I belie, 2nd Sonnet Originally 2002 Options

[AMETHYST]

I haven't written in a long while. With lack of something new and fresh to offer you, I dusted off this older Sonnet, my 2nd Sonnet infact and I am open to any suggestions and thoughts for improvement. It is a Reply Sonnet to Samuel Butler's "She was too kind, she woo'd so persistently..."

Could I Belie?

Would I have been so wise to love without
a heart to break, a voice to vow and dreams
of blissful nights-to offer less? It seems
a waste of time to entertain this doubt.
Would I be more adored by you, if I
had used you as a fool -- had played a game
and masked my care in deeper shades of shame?
To hide behind feigned words implies a lie;
perhaps this voice that says "I will be true,"
or speaks in written verse, enkindled dear,
by hands that stop to wipe away a tear,
could never spark a kindred flame in you?
Should I decide to hide a better me,
or speak of love and hope to set it free.

[anaisa]

Hi Liz,


I really enjoyed this. It's somewhat old fashioned in tone, but it all pulls together
well-- and written about a universal theme we can all relate to.

K

I haven't written in a long while. With lack of something new and fresh to offer you, I dusted off this older Sonnet, my 2nd Sonnet infact and I am open to any suggestions and thoughts for improvement. It is a Reply Sonnet to Samuel Butler's "She was too kind, she woo'd so persistently..."

Could I Belie?

Would I have been so wise to love without
a heart to break, a voice to vow and dreams
of blissful nights-to offer less? It seems
a waste of time to entertain this doubt.
Would I be more adored by you, if I
had used you as a fool -- had played a game
and masked my care in deeper shades of shame?
To hide behind feigned words implies a lie;
perhaps this voice that says "I will be true,"
or speaks in written verse, enkindled dear,
by hands that stop to wipe away a tear,
could never spark a kindred flame in you?
Should I decide to hide a better me,
or speak of love and hope to set it free.