Tea, Senyru Options

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

I will pour the tea
drink carefully it is hot
it tastes bittersweet.

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Leo, Thanks for reading, no problem on the personal message, I figured you hadn't quite got the rules straight. As for my poem, it is not Haiku it is senyru and it was supposed to be 5-7-5 I missed a syllable in the second line by the contraction of "it is" to 'it's' have changed that. Yes, Snow stated that she has seen two forms of Haiku although I have not. The difference between Haiku and Senyru is that Haiku usually is referenced to a season or nature where as Senyru deals with all else. The two, two, one rule applies to all critique formats Not just Shogun's. Just remember two days, two critiques, one post. LOL. PS I am not an expert in haiku or Senyru, I just write and post...lol.
Steve

[Eisa]

Leo, Thanks for reading, no problem on the personal message, I figured you hadn't quite got the rules straight. As for my poem, it is not Haiku it is senyru and it was supposed to be 5-7-5 I missed a syllable in the second line by the contraction of "it is" to 'it's' have changed that. Yes, Snow stated that she has seen two forms of Haiku although I have not. The difference between Haiku and Senyru is that Haiku usually is referenced to a season or nature where as Senyru deals with all else. The two, two, one rule applies to all critique formats Not just Shogun's. Just remember two days, two critiques, one post. LOL. PS I am not an expert in haiku or Senyru, I just write and post...lol.
Steve

Hi Steve, Leo and everyone

I've just come in again with the haiku links I put in Larry's 'Hugs' thread, in case peopel come here wondering what all these versions of haiku are.


The traditional image of haiku based on 5-7-5 syllables is of course true in Japan, but times ideas have changed.
When translating haiku into Japanese, a new problem arises -- one English/Spanish/French syllable can become two or three in Japanese. This is one reason why fewer than 17 syllables in English is the accepted pattern in most Western haiku publications today.
However, the 5-7-5 pattern is still followed by some, with excellent results,but the subject of haiku has resulted in many varying opinions over the years!


If you want to read more on this subject you can follow the linkhere

you can follow some excercises here

and learn more here


This is an older link to senryu, which gives more details on actually writing here

Who would have thought that such small verses could be so complicated! I have learned a bit from other sites too and conciseness in writing seems to be the key. If it reads well with 5/7/5 that's ok, but sometimes it can be trimmed to less than 17 syllables remembering short/long/short line patterning. It's a pity our syllables don't correspond with Japanese.

I am no expert at haiku/senryu, and still flounder at all the various opinions, but I occasionally have inspiration. I feel we should enjoy our writing and not force words into a 5/7/5/ pattern if it's not necessary, but don't avoid it either - just go with the flow & enjoy!

I hope some of this might help

Snow