 Air to a Summers Day, An Oxynation. |
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Archives > Archives > ARCHIVES -> Short Form Poetry -> Shogun's Psalms
 Sep 24 08, 07:43
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 Creative Chieftain  Posts: 2,587 Joined: 9-August 03 From: Australia Member No.: 17 Real Name: John Writer of: Poetry  |
Revision 5.40:pm 26th September 2008
Air to a Summer's DAY Summer: silent steps with gentle feet and from flowers bees buzz merrily. Creatures clothed in pigments that deceive; dissolve into nature's wonderland-- where blows a hot wind to kiss my cheek. Air to a Summers DAY Summer: steps with gentle feet and from flowers, bees buzz merrily. Insects sporting pigments that decieve fade into coloured petaled chambers. Where blows a hot wind to kiss my cheek. repeat Where blows a hot wind to kiss my cheek. John 
·······  ·······Arnfinn
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Sep 29 08, 19:29
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 Mosaic Master  Posts: 18,892 Joined: 1-August 03 From: Massachusetts Member No.: 2 Real Name: Lori Kanter Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Imhotep |
Hey John,
What a lovely new take on your Summer's Day saga!  I haven't heard of this form before but your poem is very calm and serene. Other than not needing those commas up in L1, this is a lovely read!Enjoyed mate. ~Cleo
······· ·······"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!  "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner     |
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Posts in this topic
Arnfinn Air to a Summers Day Sep 24 08, 07:43 
ohsteve John, Is that first word summen or summer? Makes a... Sep 24 08, 19:00 Arnfinn G'day Steve,
Summer, mate.
I left a word out... Sep 26 08, 02:36 Peggy Carpenter Harwood Hi John,
I'm not familiar with this style, bu... Sep 28 08, 17:51 Arnfinn Hi, Peg
Nah, I want a pause before 'and... Sep 29 08, 06:06 Peggy Carpenter Harwood Hi John,
Thanks for clarifying "air." ... Sep 29 08, 08:46 Arnfinn Yeah, Peg,
The whole scenario, is captivating. ... Sep 30 08, 09:04 Arnfinn Hi Lori,
Yeah, I'm very happy with this piec... Sep 30 08, 09:09 ohsteve John, I like the change very much, makes for an ea... Sep 30 08, 15:34 Arnfinn Thank Steve,
I think I'll take the girls adv... Oct 1 08, 02:44 prerna bala your nine silly bulls sing a nice song Mister Jan 13 09, 06:49 
Arnfinn Thank You PB,
dON'T GET ME GOING.
i... Jan 14 09, 05:50 1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
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