Hi Linda
There is a lot to like here. I do love short poems that say so much in a few lines. I love your vivid imagery.
A few thoughts - use or lose!
It was a death by daffodils;
There are 2 points I'd like to make about L1
1st - Was the death actually by daffodils. Perhaps I'm reading it wrong, but I'd have thought it was death to daffodils.
2nd - Perhaps you are giving too much away in the 1st line.
shocked golden mouths agape; fisted together like family (I think a comma would suffice here) on their watery lean stalks, grieving at how she had spoiled I feel it is her death, not her that spoiled the perfect spring.She didn't cut herself away a perfect spring. A cut flower now; (again, I feel a comma would suffice) just a still life on green canvas.
A suggestion of revising (only my thoughts)
Shocked golden mouths agape, fisted together like family on their watery lean stalks, grieving at how her death had spoiled a perfect spring. A cut flower now -- just a still life on green canvas.
Just something for you to think on
Snow
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