Reunited Beneath the Elderberry *** (couple of editts), A follow on from 'The Heavens Open' Options

[Eisa]

Reunited Beneath the Elderberry

I'm emptying a cereal box
as the car pulls into the drive.
He has brought you home.

You look so alive
bright eyed - yet cool.
I prepare you for the garden.

Cirri slowly roll westward
for sun to lighten the day;
the dog sleeps indoors.

Strains of Take My Breath Away
drift over the garden fence.
A red-tailed bumble buzzes round my head.

Bluebells are in bud above your sisters.
The ground is ready to receive you
coiled in your cardboard coffin.

Three days they strove to deliver you
until your kidneys could no longer
sustain the potent saving fluid.

My husband covers you with earth.
On nearby lavender,
a peacock flutters large eyes.

Perhaps I'll plant a rose amidst you all
and when thorn pricks cease to sting,
blooms will summon fragrant memories.

Weighted with the day's happenings
I doze in my armchair
until I drift into vivid dreams, where

three sisters entwine for warmth;
in a flurry of rose petals, my mother appears
arms outstretched ... then vanishes.

-----------------------------------------------------

St 7 was:

My husband covers you with earth
as a peacock flutters large eyes
on nearby lavender.

St 8 L3 was:

blooms will bring happier memories.

[jerryk]

Reunited Beneath the Elderberry

I'm emptying a cereal box
as the car pulls into the drive.
He has brought you home.

You look so alive
bright eyed - yet cool.
I prepare you for the garden.

Cirri slowly roll westward
for sun to lighten the day;
the dog sleeps indoors.

Strains of Take My Breath Away
drift over the garden fence.
A red tailed bumble buzzes round my head.

Bluebells are in bud above your sisters.
The ground is ready to receive you
coiled in your cardboard coffin.

Three days they strove to deliver you
until your kidneys could no longer
sustain the potent saving fluid.

My husband covers you with earth
as a peacock flutters large eyes
on nearby lavender.

Perhaps I'll plant a rose amidst you all
and when thorn pricks cease to sting,
blooms will bring happier memories.

Weighted with the days happenings
I doze in my armchair
until I drift into vivid dreams, where

three sisters entwine for warmth;
in a flurry of rose petals, my mother appears
arms outstretched ... then vanishes.

Hi Snow;
fine write; quite touching, actually. I can see where the death and burial of a pet can conjure up the vision of a human you cherished. Each time one of my pets died, usually at a ripe old age, I too died a little. That's how some of us humans are programmed: we accept our pets so totally and make them a permanent part of our lives. I have no crits to offer, as I find your verses well thought through. By the way: our son lives in Connecticut in a wooded area with all sort of wildlife about, including garter snakes that have taken over his garage, lol. He had to usher a 3-footer out the open door--right after my 6 year old grandson inspected it from head to the tip of its tail. Great sequel to your previous. Be well, Snow. :)
Jerry

[Eisa]

Thanks Jerry,

Our garden has quite a large pet cemetery, with dogs, guinea pig, fish and many reptiles. Even a few nestling fallen out of their nests.
Good luck to your son with those snakes. I prefer them kept locked in a vivarium.

Snow

[Psyche]

Dear Eira,

Great reply to the other poem. I like it very much. It has feelings. Thoughts. Visions of loved ones gone.

One strophe trips me up a little:

My husband covers you with earth
as a peacock flutters large eyes
on nearby lavender.

I think it might flow better if you were to say:

My husband covers you with earth.
On nearby lavender,
a peacock flutters large eyes.

ToT!!!

The finale is so true! Once when I said I was depressed, to a family member, I was told not to think about events that happened long ago. But depression works exactly that way: All the sad things in your whole life seem to weigh down on you like a stone. Stuff you thought accepted creeps out of niches in your mind and hits you unforgivingly.

This can happen in a short period of feeling "down", or in a major depression.

So I think you've painted a picture in verse that is so very real. Love it!

Hugs, Syl***

[Eisa]

Thanks Syl,

It's good to have you comment here. I like your suggestion for that stanza and I'll change it now in a minute.

I think I write the best poetry when I express my feelings - I suppose everybody does. I sometimes think when we are depressed we need to revisit the past to face our demons to get through it. Some might say I think too much - but I can't help it!

Hugs
Snow

[Psyche]

Hi Eisa, I missed your answer. Nobody comes here anymore. At least I'm now receiving the e.mails, but not of this one, it's old.

You express your feelings beautifully. Nowadays "Carpe Diem" or even "live each instant of your day" appears to be the right thing. But many people's Present is not so good...I don't like general rules for all!

It's a paradox that when you drift off to sleep, you again conjure up visions of the past, of your mother. We don't really have much control over our thoughts, and certainly not of our dreams! My cat sleeps on a cushion on my bed: sometimes I wake up thinking my husband is by my side...in that period when one is only half awake...

Love your poem! It's really perfect, full of imagery and colours, like a painting.

Hugs, Syl***

Thanks Syl,

It's good to have you comment here. I like your suggestion for that stanza and I'll change it now in a minute.

I think I write the best poetry when I express my feelings - I suppose everybody does. I sometimes think when we are depressed we need to revisit the past to face our demons to get through it. Some might say I think too much - but I can't help it!

Hugs
Snow

[Eisa]

Hi Syl,

I've just realised I didn't acknowledge your reply. This poem was written so long ago. Thanks for coming back to it.

Hugs
Snow