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August 2007 IBPC Nominations, September Competition |
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Aug 29 07, 05:14
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Congrats Michelle and best of luck! ~Cleo
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Aug 29 07, 06:29
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 532
Joined: 4-September 03
From: Northwest Coast
Member No.: 29
Writer of: Poetry
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Hey Lori, I got your pm. I'm ecstatic. This is my final and best version, in my opinion:
A drop of water neither begs to stay afloat and travel leisurely for miles nor opts to fall upon a south sea isle and moisten threaded flowers on a lei.
A mountain cannot try to elevate its snowy peak nor lose its massive girth as thawing summits carry motes of earth to line the depths beneath a sound or strait.
As moons revolve, their parent planets trace a path around a star. A billion stars are like galactic cogs in spiral bars and countless galaxies dot boundless space.
The universe keeps pace. The cosmos whirls; no constellation questions movement‘s means. No rift of jealousy occurs between a moon and star; gears mesh as nature twirls.
Inside its nuts and bolts, our form conceals the consciousness within a human mind. We note the patterns coded in design and learn the laws which turn celestial wheels.
Man sees this grand machine and stands erect above its hum. He logs activity with scientific objectivity yet doubts his archetype, The Architect.
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Aug 29 07, 17:57
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Eccellent Michelle - I've made the revision for you. Best of luck - love this poem! ~Lori
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Aug 31 07, 18:12
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 862
Joined: 25-June 04
From: Ohio, USA
Member No.: 70
Real Name: Susan Eckenrode
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Merlin
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You all have been so gracious in you encouragement and support. I am most grateful that this has made it to this stage.
Here is my final version for submission:
Lovers Meet Again Two Views
Hers:
I watched you wrapping life in fantasy until you lost yourself in make-believe. Appearances took precedence and we soon parted. I still wonder—did you grieve to wake and find me gone? No way I'd leave the man you used to be. Today I know too much has come between, we won't retrieve the newness of a love we both let go. It's time to travel on with memories in tow.
His:
It’s true, I’d hide behind a fantasy, imagining some day you would believe a prince had won your heart but, sadly, we were far too far apart; it’s that I grieve. The maybes topped with what-ifs made you leave and left me lost in all I didn’t know. If fate allows one chance, we could retrieve the remnants of our love. Don't let it go to perish, pulled apart by pride’s strong undertow.
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Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it. MM Award Winner
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Aug 31 07, 19:09
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Excellent Rev Sue. Best of luck! I'll be sending off the email in the morning to Gina and Robert at IBPC. Cheers ~Cleo
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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