QUOTE (laryalee @ Jun 12 07, 05:12 )
Hi Snow,
what an effective image!
My first question would be...
when you say "snakes entwine", does that
indicate a mating ritual?
I'm not sure...there could be other reasons,
perhaps.
Would a setting add to this...either the weather,
a kigo such as late summer, etc.?
Mind you, if you want to keep the cold-blooded
connection, it feels a bit like a senryu.
I'm not sure what to suggest...it depends on the
direction you want to go.
snakes entwined
in a mating ritual --
his cold kiss
Lary
Hi Lary -- sorry I'm late getting back to this.
I have pet snakes and the kind of entwining I am meaning is when they're mating. They often coil up together for warmth, but when they mate, they slowly move, entwining their bodies as a kind of foreplay. It's very sensual and beautiful.
I like you suggestion, or perhaps
snakes entwine
in their mating ritual --
his cold embrace
I'll keep thinking on this one -- I'm so tired tonight I can hardly think straight LOL!
Thanks for your help and insiration Lary.
Snow
I was thinking of this more as a senryu