Spirit's Flight, adapted from a drabble Options

[Guest_Nina_*]

Spirit’s Flight (revised, thanks Cathy)

While others slumber,
I stand in half-light,
watching Sun’s fiery ascent.

Light shimmers on incoming tides;
waves wash golden sands,
lapping bare feet;
sea-breeze ruffles
flowing locks.

Wrapt in Nature’s rhythms,
my spirit soars.
Stretching cramped limbs;
it flies on gossamer wings -
dancing, spinning, gliding
into imagination’s furthest reaches.

Eagerly it stows drifting dreams,
rainbow fantasies,
star-spun thoughts
in a hope-lined basket.

As life stirs,
enchantment fades,
images dissolve;
leaving only a faint trace…

words conjured on a page.




Spirit’s Flight

While all around slumber,
I stand in half-light,
watching Sun’s fiery ascent.

Light shimmers on incoming tides;
waves wash golden sands,
lapping bare feet;
sea-breeze ruffles
flowing locks.

Wrapt in Nature’s rhythms,
my spirit soars.
Stretching cramped limbs;
it flies on gossamer wings -
dancing, spinning, gliding
into imagination’s furthest reaches.

Eagerly it stows drifting dreams,
rainbow fantasies,
star-spun thoughts
in a hope-lined basket.

As life stirs,
enchantment fades,
images dissolve;
leaving only a faint trace…

words conjured on a page.


copyright Nina 2006


Nina

[Guest_Cathy_*]

Hi Nina,

Isn't it great to get the words down before the images or thoughts disappear? *smiles* I think this a wonderful depiction of hitting on an idea and hoping to get it down before it's lost! That has happened to me so many times, I finally decided I couldn't trust my memory and if I think of something while I'm in bed I make sure I get up and jot it down somewhere! lol

While all around slumber, This line was a bit confusing to me for some reason. Why not simply 'While all slumber' or 'while others slumber' ...?
I stand in half-light,
watching Sun’s fiery ascent. You could actually be doing this or ... lying in bed imagining it!

Light shimmers on incoming tides;
waves wash golden sands,
lapping bare feet;
sea-breeze ruffles
flowing locks. This is a beautiful image! I'm wondering ... would it work connected to the next verse with an elipsis or another semi-colon? It feels as though it should go on with the first line in your next stanza instead of having an end stop.

Wrapt in Nature’s rhythms,
my spirit soars.
Stretching cramped limbs;
it flies on gossamer wings -
dancing, spinning, gliding
into imagination’s furthest reaches. I love the imagery here! lol It's a wonderful feeling when inspiration takes over and you write and write with no obvious trouble ... words have taken wing!

Eagerly it stows drifting dreams,
rainbow fantasies,
star-spun thoughts
in a hope-lined basket.

As life stirs,
enchantment fades,
images dissolve;
leaving only a faint trace…

words conjured on a page. Great ending! The dream fades as we awaken but luckily you were able to capture it!

I enjoyed the read Nina! Most assuredly! *smiles*

Cathy

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

enraptured with your spirit dancing, cavorting on a whim. then fade in to reality,,,great read thanks,
Steve

[Guest_Nina_*]

Thanks Cathy

This line was a bit confusing to me for some reason. Why not simply 'While all slumber' or 'while others slumber' ...?

yes, could say others, thanks.

You could actually be doing this or ... lying in bed imagining it!

my intention was the former.

This is a beautiful image! I'm wondering ... would it work connected to the next verse with an elipsis or another semi-colon? It feels as though it should go on with the first line in your next stanza instead of having an end stop.

thanks very much. I will consider your suggestion.

I love the imagery here! lol It's a wonderful feeling when inspiration takes over and you write and write with no obvious trouble ... words have taken wing!

yes, doesn't happen very often

Thanks muchly for reading and commenting.

Nina

[Guest_Nina_*]

Thanks Steve :)

Nina

[JLY]

Nina,
I know you have been so busy, it's always a pleasure to read your work. Always look forward to your poetic postings.
This was very nice and your images are very moving.

It may be just me but in the following line, I subsconsciously interject "deepest" into the following line:

into imagination’s furthest [deepest] reaches.

JLY

[Guest_Nina_*]

Hi John

I know you have been so busy, it's always a pleasure to read your work. Always look forward to your poetic postings.

Thank you so much for your lovely words. You are too kind.

This was very nice and your images are very moving.

Thank you

It may be just me but in the following line, I subsconsciously interject "deepest" into the following line:

into imagination’s furthest [deepest] reaches.

My only problem with deepest is that it tends to make me think of the dark side of my imagination which isn't the image I wanted here.

Thanks again for reading and commenting

Nina

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hi Nina.

What a wonderful poem here to remind us of imagination's grasp - finding it sometimes in reach and sometimes just shy of it. This is a wonderful depiction Nina of personifying your muse. The images of sun, warmth, ocean, tie with fantasy very well.


Wrapt in Nature’s rhythms,
my spirit soars.
Stretching cramped limbs{;}[,]
it flies on gossamer wings -
dancing, spinning, gliding
into imagination’s furthest reaches.
This could be a poem all by itself - lovely!

As life stirs,
enchantment fades,
images dissolve;
leaving only a faint trace…

words conjured on a page.

Bet the imagination had a hell of a fun journey while conjuring?
Enjoyed!
~Cleo

[Guest_Nina_*]

Thanks Lori

Yes, it was fun to write, though it actually started off as a drabble which I've adapted to a more poetic form.

Nina

[Cyn]

Nina
This is lovely
Would you consider though refering to Spirit as SHE instead of IT. Try it and see how you think it reads

[Peterpan]

Spirit’s Flight (revised, thanks Cathy)

While others slumber,
I stand in half-light,
watching Sun’s fiery ascent.

Light shimmers on incoming tides;
waves wash golden sands,
lapping bare feet;
sea-breeze ruffles
flowing locks.

Wrapt in Nature’s rhythms,
my spirit soars.
Stretching cramped limbs;
it flies on gossamer wings -
dancing, spinning, gliding
into imagination’s furthest reaches.

Eagerly it stows drifting dreams,
rainbow fantasies,
star-spun thoughts
in a hope-lined basket.

B>Lovely images Nina!!!!

As life stirs,
enchantment fades,
images dissolve;
leaving only a faint trace…

words conjured on a page.


B>Well done Nina! Loved the poem!

PP




Spirit’s Flight

While all around slumber,
I stand in half-light,
watching Sun’s fiery ascent.

Light shimmers on incoming tides;
waves wash golden sands,
lapping bare feet;
sea-breeze ruffles
flowing locks.

Wrapt in Nature’s rhythms,
my spirit soars.
Stretching cramped limbs;
it flies on gossamer wings -
dancing, spinning, gliding
into imagination’s furthest reaches.

Eagerly it stows drifting dreams,
rainbow fantasies,
star-spun thoughts
in a hope-lined basket.

As life stirs,
enchantment fades,
images dissolve;
leaving only a faint trace…

words conjured on a page.


copyright Nina 2006


Nina

[Guest_Nina_*]

Thanks very much Cyn,

I will consider changing "it" to "she"

Nina

[Guest_Nina_*]

Thanks very much Bev

Nina