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Poetic challenge using Frost's 'Stopping by Woods...", same format, your own story |
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Jan 9 10, 13:12
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Group: Gold Member
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From: Time, Immoral
Member No.: 66
Writer of: Poetry
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Good to have you join in, Leo & Larry. Poor ole Bob - I wonder if he regrets making those promises... Here's another addition - I thought I'd have a bit of fun with things.
RF was working hard that day, A load of wood was on his sleigh. He noticed he had miles to go So off he went without delay.
The weather changed – wooden you know! The wind began to really blow And Bob decided on the spot He best get moving lest it snow.
He moved the stick-shift onto “Trot” And exited their small woodlot. It soon gets dark that time of year As stars come out. The moon did not.
Down by the lake he saw two deer, One near the front, one at the rear. A splendid scene, cool, crisp and clear; A splendid scene, cool, crisp and clear.
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Guest_ohsteve_*
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Jan 9 10, 17:51
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Guest
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Eric my wizardering friend, what a nice refresher for good ol' Bob.
Steve
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Jan 11 10, 20:33
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
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From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Well done Leo! Glad to see you trying out this challenge too! I luv it! Could it be that jolly old man is RF's long lost cousin? Hmmmm... Maybe HE's asleep! Enjoyed! ~Cleo
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Jan 11 10, 20:37
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Hi Larry, I MUST go ahead and beat my muse into submission one of these days - I'm going on nearly one full year now of hardly a scribble... Perhaps the SQ hybrids is what I need? I particularly like these lines: I fall. A sleep in dreamless sorrows, deep despair at love’s demise? I did not keep those promises I made. I fail to sleep in dreamless sorrows, deep. I fall asleep.I'm certain Robert would like it too! Enjoyed! ~Cleo
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Jan 11 10, 20:39
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
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Referred By:Imhotep
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Eric, A great addition to our little jingle of Frosty proportions! Enjoyed! ~Cleo
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Jan 11 10, 20:53
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
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Referred By:Imhotep
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I've only just jotted down the first stanza - anyone like to add the second?
An arctic chant we’ve come to know has graced us once again and though we shan’t perceive it stopping here, It races on -- this earth-bound snow.
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Jan 12 10, 11:30
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,402
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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Hi Lori,
Glad you and Bob liked my meager offering. I'll give your "starting stanza" a try.
An arctic chant we’ve come to know has graced us once again and though we shan’t perceive it stopping here, it races on. This earth-bound snow
bequeaths, with wind-blown drifts, the queer and eerie sculptures built so near the crystal mirror... azure lake reflections stolen one more year.
Next please!
Lori, I changed the cap "It" in L4. Hope you don't mind.
Larry
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Jan 12 10, 12:58
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
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Referred By:Imhotep
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Larry! Yeah, I had meant to edit that Cap (Word always caps every line) - TY! I'll paste in the next stanza into Word and see if my muse can come with anything. I'm dealing with the teasings of a chest cold so I'm a bit "foggy" all around, lol! Be back! ~Cleo
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Jan 12 10, 14:18
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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OK - here's my attempt at the third stanza, Larry. (I'm not happy with L3/L4 - feel free to offer up something different:
An arctic chant we’ve come to know has graced us once again and though we shan’t perceive it stopping here, it races on. This earth-bound snow
bequeaths, with wind-blown drifts, the queer and eerie sculptures built so near the crystal mirror... azure lake reflections stolen one more year.
A symbol shared? A twofold shake unites this numinous mistake creating an unearthly sweep of snow-white shapes from downy flake.
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Jan 12 10, 16:43
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,402
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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Hi again Lori, Looks like we didn't give anyone else a chance at this one. Changed L3 a bit to go in the direction S4 was headed. Hope you like it. If not, crit and chip away the dross. Also gave it a title which seems fitting but who knows.
Winters Song
An arctic chant we’ve come to know has graced us once again and though we shan’t perceive it stopping here, it races on. This earth-bound snow
bequeaths, with wind-blown drifts, the queer and eerie sculptures built so near the crystal mirror... azure lake reflections stolen one more year.
A symbol shared? A twofold shake unites this numinous mistake creating life with deadly sweep of snow. White shapes, from downy flake,
arise from nothing to grave deep. Hold each unwary soul and keep their pallid form in endless sleep. Chant dirges for those chosen. Sleep!
Hope you don't have H1N1 or even worse, that dreaded winter cold.
Larry
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Jan 12 10, 18:15
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Mosaic Master
Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep
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Well done, Larry! We should pick another poem and try this again (or try another one here)!!! Thanks for your responses - a FAB result! Yeah, I've been bothered by this cold - it hasn't really done much, although I've had it for over a month (just a slight nasal run mostly), hardly enough for the tissue factor, but yesterday and today, it's a bit more runny and now the chest feels compressed a bit. So, I'm home now relaxing after a BUSY but none-to-stressful day at work. Gonna make some soup and rest on the couch. I'll log in later from my laptop downstairs then. I didn't do the H1N1 shot yet, but did do the annual flu shot end of October. Hope you are well! Cheers, Lori
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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the RingsCollaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. KanterNominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner
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Apr 23 16, 00:04
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,402
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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Empty Nest - Again
Excitement wanes for I should know they too will leave these halls, although it was so nice to have them here; they melt away like fallen snow.
I know it’s strange and sometimes queer for folks to come from far and near, across the oceans or a lake they go their way inside a year.
Were there more poet-trees to shake I’d make them sway, make no mistake. Now I’ll just get my broom and sweep the cobwebs from these halls. Each flake
of paint piles up, they’re getting deep and bins are full. I guess they’ll keep until I get a bit of sleep. Where’s everyone? Perhaps they sleep.
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Apr 27 16, 15:02
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From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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A Visit to Sleepy, Hollow WoodMost Karnak visitors I know; some others do come see us, though. Those secret few may stop in here where we hang words on trees like snow. The passers-by will think us queer to blather on while no one's near our woods; they're off to swim their lake and may be back some time next year. (I just slugged down a veggie shake too quick to catch my kale mistake; I think I'll take a break and sweep the kitchen floor of old corn flakes.) I'm back to write, but nothing deep; my way-down thoughts will have to keep. To read such things would make you sleep, and I'm the one who needs the sleep. © MLee Dickens'son 27 May 2016... and Larry, here is an older play on RF's poem. Perhaps your remember it? Non-Stop but Woods on a Summer Evening
Whose roads these are I do not care for I but travel them to where I’d rather be; just stopping here to un-tank from my caffeine share
that guides leased Lancer without fear that into some deep ditch I’d steer… for auto-pilot’s not a choice, not even cruise control this year,
and I’ve no chauffeured black Rolls-Royce. I’ll call to hear my honey’s voice, relieve at every pause I must, play tapes of James Montgomery Boice.
I’m glad there’ll be no snow, but just some rain and wind… no frost, I trust… so back to Bridgeton now or bust ... headlong ... to nestle at her bust.
© MLee Dickens'son 24 June 2004 from Syracuse NY to Bridgeton, NJ
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May 11 16, 22:15
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,402
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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Hi Daniel,
Sorry but I don't remember the second one and could not find it in any of the Frost challenges. I might try it using your last words but don't know anything or anyone called or named Boyce.
I'll have to stick with the original end-rhymes when I write another.
Larry
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May 12 16, 09:31
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 18,643
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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I don't think the older one was from a challenge. it was merely triggered by the same Frost piece of this challenge, long before the challenge. And I'm surprised that you don't know about James Montgomery Boice, who was the long-time pastor at Tenth Presbyterian Church in Philadelphia and was a prolific writer. deLighting in your sharing, Daniel
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May 12 16, 22:03
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,402
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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I am sorry that I didn’t know about Boyce and his writings, although I’m from Texas. He never came here where some Baptists might look for Hell’s snow.
Raised as one, I would think it quite queer that his sermons or writings came near to a small children’s home by a lake. Though our choir went on tour every year
there is doubt without any headshake, and I’d not think it was a mistake that he’d care to attend. When the sweep of our songs, A Capella, would flake
biased scaled from his eyes. We were deep into Bach, Latin chants and we’d keep every venue from going to sleep. Our choir’s voice would wake Boyce from his sleep.
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May 13 16, 09:01
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 18,643
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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I am sorry, but how could I know Dr Boyce was unknown there, although he was widely well-known, not just here where the Baptists say, Hell to the snow!
And they like Presbyterians. Queer? I don't think so; their churches are near to each other. It's not like a lake is between, so they meet up each year.
I am wondering why the head-shake; Tenth Pres. choir never makes a mistake and their organist really might sweep you right off of your feet. They've no flakes
in their choir, and their repertoire's deep into classics and modern, so keep your own bias at bay; you'd not sleep when they sing. In your bed you will sleep.
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May 17 16, 11:34
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,402
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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Would that I, in my youth came to know choirs of excellent skill and although they used orchestras; there were none here in my Church of Christ years. It would snow
in the desert and none think it queer. A Capella! No instruments near that denomination by the lake. It seemed strange in my first college year
as a voice major. I couldn’t shake the strange feelings, thought it a mistake which at times would drown harmony’s sweep. Instruments hid those few who were flakes.
My great love as a purist was deep like my voice which I no longer keep for my life choices put it to sleep. It remains in my dreams when I sleep.
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May 17 16, 18:34
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 18,643
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
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In my youth, I sang tenor, you know, in falsetto through voice-change, although I'm a basso. But we've no choir here where we've worshipped for five or six snows.
Well, we used to have one, and it's queer that we stopped, and resuming's not near. It had happened when our nearby lake emptied as the dam broke; but last year
it has filled up again. Yet, no shake in our musical lack. A mistake? Choir's director's on leave; did they sweep the group under the rug like corn flakes?
I don't think there's some mystery, deep; We were part-time at best, didn't keep up a schedule; we didn't lose sleep if we didn't perform. Let it sleep.
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May 20 16, 18:43
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,402
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
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There are some things I wish that I could know, and others hidden from my ken, although there are no written records. Are they here or buried on the mountain tops with snow?
Scientifically, anomalies are queer; though faith is rampant, proof is nowhere near. Some folks would tell me, “go jump in the lake” but I reply, “no thanks, did that last year”!
Did meteors cause all the world to shake and kill the dinosaurs? Was it mistake that archeologists find bones and sweep millennia away, one flake by flake?
The origin of man… a subject, deep will be around for some time but will keep until the One all-knowing bids us sleep and all will waken from our naive sleep.
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