Image by the Stormy Sea, surprise challenge Options

[Cleo_Serapis]

I don't believe I've written a response to this one yet myself!

One of these days (my latest motto)! Shock

~Cleo

[Blank_Canvas]

Thanks Lori & James for the welcome back.....makes me feel very nice. I have missed many things about MM, but especially you people who seem like old friends. This is the first poem submitted in many many months. Have written very few since being away. I appreciate your comments and am glad you found it enjoyable to read. So glad you stopped by to read and voice your thoughts.~ smile ~ Thought I would start out with a few challenges, as having guidelines and visuals to inspire me often gets me motivated and the creative urges flowing. This was fun....felt very good to write something original again.
And, yes, Lori was kind enough to accomodate my name change. Have been considering it for some time. Don't mean to confuse everyone...it just seems a better fit for me.
                                   Thanks, guys....
                                     Marcia

[Guest_Nina_*]

Hi Marcia

Well done with this challenge, a very moving poem.  I could see the ghostly shadows of old ships and hear the moans and cries, feel the eerie atmosphere you depict.

I agree with James about the last line, it is very powerful.

I'm glad you found inspiration from this.  I hadn't seen this challenge before.  It is an interesting picture.  I may have a go at it myself.

I hope we see many more of your poetry on the board.  I didn't know your old screen name so I'm not confused.  Good you see you back on here and I look forward to interacting with you some more.

Nina

[Blank_Canvas]

Nina,
    Thanks for commenting on my first attempt upon returning. Glad you found it had some praiseworthy attributes. Do so appreciate the encouragement friends offer here.....
     My former screen name was nubian healer. Came up with that in the beginning when a lot of historical references were popular. I am a former nurse, hence the healer......
     I am a gemini, and I favor change and variety.....I just found a title that fit me better and ties in with my quote on the bottom of my postings. Making a new start and starting out with a fresh attitude and a new name. Can't change the person within much, but I'm trying to make a few changes in her, too ! ~laugh~
                                            Marcia  

Do give this challenge a try.....one photo can impact each person in a totally different way and the poems can become as varied as the people themselves. Hear that Lori and James? What's holding you guys back ?  Do Bren and I have to do all the work around here ?   ~just teasing~

[Cleo_Serapis]

Tee hee!

Now Marcia, everyone knows that it takes me at least a month AFTER I promise to do something that i actually do it. :p Thanks for whipping me into the spirit though! I've got this one, Grace's train image challenge and the Sept Pandora to do. Nd I mustn't forget the snowball fight! WHIPPPEEEEE!

I'll be there real soon!
Cheers
~Cleo

[Guest_Nina_*]

Hi Marcia

Thanks for telling me what your screen name was.  A change can be good thing quite cleansing.  I'm a scorpio.  I'll have a look at the picture and if it inspires me, I may write something.

Nina

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Twilight’s Last Gleam

Lone citadel on peninsulas fingery point,
light flows both ways in the tangerine sky.
Neon artistry pierced by a slow circle of yellow-white,
at times fog enshrouded your groaning echoes
from the rocks and the low scudding clouds.

Barnacled encrusted cliffs cut the rolls
of overrated vapors in twain.
A lone sea Tern cries out his disgust at being
roused at early dusk.

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hi Steve.

What a fab response to this image!  

Some of your phrases like Lone citadel, fog enshrouded and lone sea Tern really mark the title of your piece well - last gleam.

I enjoyed this one!

Cheers.
Cleo  

[Blank_Canvas]

Steve,
Am just reading this, but I must echo Lori and say this was a wonderful response. Your lines evoke images and are beautifully written.
Marcia

[Guest_Rosemerta_*]

I wanted to post this before reading and posting to the others.


The Devil's Lighthouse

Some say it is a legend,
others see only a curse.
To me it is a story,
to share with you in this verse.

Upon the eve of summer,
beneath a tangerine sky,
come vessels for the slaughter,
for here is where they will die.

It’s called the Devil’s Lighthouse,
this tower that holds the sea.
It’s light guides every sailor
to where their last breath will be.

“Come to me blue-jackets all,
follow the warmth of my glow.”
The song is quite deceiving
for beams hide the rocks below.

As the sky fades to twilight,
if you be a passer by,
you’ll only see the splinters
and hear the skeletal cries.

[Guest_Rosemerta_*]

Hi Steve

You have so much vivid imagery woven within this poem. You covered the aspects of strength, beauty, mystery, time, and humor most amazingly. Huzzah!

[Guest_shaggy breeks_*]

hello my names james
Im about four years old and i love living with my daddy in the lighthouse, he makes me so proud because i know that know one will hit the shallow end of the sea because my daddy has turned the lights on for them.

The other day mum went to the post office just down the road and she saw a really fun magazine that she said would really squeeze my creative juices.

I was a little confused when she said that becasue i checked and i couldnt find any creative juices in me at all. perhaps she got her words muddled up.

When she got home she put on a cd, she says this is what makes my creative juices flow. She sat down at the piano and played along with it. I watched for ages and ages but she didnt even look a little bit juicy at all. In the end i turned to my magazine, atleast that wont make my head go blurry.

I was so wrong! On the front where super specs they say it can make you see 3d, i dont think id ever seen 3d before so i was really exited. As i put them on the whole world went funny, my mum turned green and the fruit in the fruit bowl where all the wrong colour. I ran to my mum and told her that these glasses make everything the wrong colour but she was too busy singing about tangerine skies with mr beatles.

In desparate need of answers i ran up and up, and then up about another 100 trillion times to my daddy who was going to be turning our big night light on soon. I got to the top and the sight that greeted me was so pretty. The waves had orange riding on them like surfer people and the rocks werent brown anymore they where black, just like my mums piano but less shiny. that wasnt the best bit though, up in the sky shining through the clouds which where red was a sky just like the words in my mums song.

The tangerine sky!

[Cleo_Serapis]

Tee hee!

A very creative response (despite what your 'narrator' might say). Welcome to Pandora's Chaos!

Enjoyed!

~Cleo

[wordsart]

Hope this is right ? Not sure if I shoudl use reply or new topic?

I posted in the wrong place initially.

Tangerine Sky Song

The tangerine sky crept over last Tuesday
as I picked my way through the rocks.
you said good bye on that purple and blue day
and left me to ponder the flocks
of sea birds who gathered to watch your departing
under a crepusculed sky, where it seems,
the lighthouse and I have each played our part in
crushing my tangerine dreams.
The turquoise rock pools and the dark chocolate sands
will weep with me 'til they are dry.
How I yearn to see you return to me
under the tangerine sky.

Feb 10th 2007

[Larry]

Misconception

A boiling, caustic sea ascends in blue-grey clouds
to quench, appease an angry fire, insane rainbow,
from palette of humanity’s insanities;
a blow.

Accusing finger’s bones ignite, through white hot shrouds
of melting skin, point to a planetary glow.
Conception of man’s esoteric vanities
will grow

into a beacon; candle in the stellar crowds.
Extinction… as the tangerine sky’s garish show
reflect death’s mushroom colors; grotesque fantasy’s
shadow.

My apology is offered, in advance, to the artist who created this vibrantly colored painting of a lighthouse by the ocean.
My first impression stayed with me and I could think of nothing else but "a moment" depicting the impending result of a neuclear holocaust.
That is why I titled the poem as I did.

[Cleo_Serapis]

Why hello wordsart!

Sorry fot not seeing this sooner - yes, this is the correct place to reply for this particular challenge. I enjoed your
Tangerine Sky Song response! It starts so sincere then whoops, turns to the crushing realization of the parting of the couple. Not sure if this is 'death' or something else, but that's how I interpret it. Well done with soft rhymes and a brilliant message.

Enjoyed!
~Cleo


Hello Larry!

Thanks for the reminder to visit this thread!

What a fab opening to your response, filled with wonderful inner rhymes and imagery! I love the visual of an insane rainbow and it being a palette of humanity’s insanities - AWESOME!!!! Great lead in to the thoughts of the Haulocast and those horrific events.

S2 keeps the inner rhymes and theme of such despair going smoothly and distinctly - a bit gross but poignantly worded.

S3 - a great follow through and new twist on the utter toil of death and devastation that insane, sick, twisted man Hitler wrought. I think you could make this poem even stronger and more violent if you should choose to further this along.

Enjoyed the read and the message!
~Cleo

[Larry]

Lori,
You picked up on the "Hitler" nuance but didn't get the follow-through into the total extinction of mankind and the self destruction of a nuclear holocaust and the making of a "new" candle among the brighter stars of the universe. That is, of course, what would/will happen if all the nations' bombs went Ka-blooie. I am glad you liked the poem and await your "long promised" addition to this particular challenge.

Larry

[Cleo_Serapis]

Ok Larry,

You asked for it, LOL - so here it is..

Aftermath

The world screams unto deaf ears…

A bronzed-tangerine sky
envelops crystal-blue eyes
that no longer yearn to see.

In a sea of climacteric tears,
she weeps --
questioning why the Existence
she once recognized
has withdrawn itself.

No more do Sun and Moon rise
to glorify new beginnings!
Today, they hide from truth.
Their purpose…
untold;
misplaced to evolution.

Once the vapors clear,
she will open her eyes
to light the way to fresh starts,
but for what or whom,
she cannot say with certainty.


_{Copyright © Lorraine M Kanter 29 Mar 08}


This idea came from watching a tv program recently called 'Aftermath' intended to show how the earth will change if all humans are wiped off it. A great show!

[Larry]

Hey Lori,

A very nice prosaic summation of the bitter end to which mankind is rushing. I have only one small nit (if nit's are allowed in this forum).

You split the "Tangerine Sky" with bronze. You could have said "A bronzed tangerine sky" to maintain the directive for this challenge.

Otherwise, I loved your addition to this thread (finally).

Larry

[Cleo_Serapis]

HI Larry - thanks so much!

Sure, one can offer advice here, but remember it's not an official crit forum. I have posted this for crtis however, in Seren's here: http://forums.mosaicmusings.net/index.php?showtopic=11976 and have made some changes which I'm not certain are better or worse, lol!

If you'd be so kind, I'd enjoy hearing your thoughts on it.

Thanks so much! Hope to post some responses, but am straight out at work for the past two weeks plus next four on that ongoing project...

Take care,
Lori