A Paraphrased Tribute to a Bard of Yore, An effort to restate the poet's prize piece Options

[jgdittier]

This rewrite honors the originator poet and is intended to follow as much of his "mystery poem" as I could devise. Hopefully, it might be somewhat like what he might have written with the same thought on a different day.

A canopy of stars o'erhead
Before an ebon canvas spread...
The Heavens smile and then proclaim

With ev'ry star a candle's flame...
And shining sun, in daily glow,
This Sachem's Sire, doth power show
And demonstrate to all the world
HIS land below the solar curl.*

Late in the day as darkness calls,
Then luna's lux on flowers falls.
And once again, dear Mother Earth,
Just wrap your arms around your girth
As stellar shafts and moonlight streams

And planets too, in their regimes
Attest to tidings in their place
And hold us all in their embrace.

What means it all, this universe?
So many worlds, so vast, diverse!
In all of space, what be our aim?
Are we to claim both blame and fame?
What be our cause, to heights we'll rise,
Those balls of rock, be our allies?

Let's all rejoice, heed His design.
What God has wrought, is all divine!

*curl-apparent orbit of the sun

Can you ID the mystery poem and link to it?

[JustDaniel]

Greetings, JG...

I don't know just which of his poems this one is a tribute to, but I suspect that the author is your namesake, Mr. Whittier ?

Here's a link at least to one of his poems:

Randolph Of Roanoke

Gotta scoot for now...

Lightly hoofin' it, Daniel

[jgdittier]

Dear Daniel,
I am being very experimental here by posting something thid diverse from what is anticipated.
My paraphrases are written as close to the original as I can make them. I use the same metre, the same rhyme scheme, as much as possible the same message, the same number of lines, the same punctuation and capitalization.
I know this forum gets little traffic and I know that puzzles here are a longshot.
I've posted hundreds of these mystery tributes at other sites where there was little interest in serious critiques. Thus my anticipation is minimal and I'm practical as to whether folks will respond or better yet, try to do the ID.
Please feel no obligation.
Cheers, Ron
ps- You've reminded me of how many Whittier works I've not yet read!
Cheers, Ron jgd

[JustDaniel]

I have a great inerest to make the comaprasin, but alas I'm so narrowly read that I have little to go on. One cannot be reminded of something one has never read!

All I can do is wait to find out from you or another, no matter what the length, depth, breadth or height of my interest. One cannot squeeze blood out of a pea-brain.

Lightly, Daniel

[jgdittier]

Dear Daniel,
Historically there have been less than a dozen gumshoes who ever solved one of these tribute/puzzlers. Therewere two fellows, who, between them mastered about 95% of them,
one whom recently passed on. Hopefully, Chanticleer/Rooster/Merlin will peek in and supply the competition.
I believe successful tecs find key words to use at certain poetry sites to aid them in their searches. When I misplace my answers I usually find I can't solve my own puzzlers.
I promote the form of the bards of yore and thus these paras are intended to motivate the curious to reading their works while in the search for the answer. I doubt fewer than 5% of all the paras I've written elsewhere were identified due to initial familiarity.
As to blood out of a pea brain, I agree. However, you do one better by getting all your masterful poetry from it, that is if it's really pea-like.
Cheers, Ron, jgd

[JustDaniel]

I'm terrible at research, since I'm such a sluggishly slow reader, Ron...

so if you have any suggested search vehicle specifically for poetry, I'd be happy to utilize it... so I can be selective in the pieces that I will take time for.

... and okay, so my brain is prune-sized!

Lightly, Daniel

[JustDaniel]

Well, I've been searching for almost two more hours, and I'm out of time, Ron... (of which I unfortunately have too little)...

and I'm totally stumped. I've looked up every key word I could think of, and simply find nothing, though I've scanned some pretty interesting works by Burns, Keats, Whitman, Whittier and many lesser knowns, but alas...

Anyhow, I did run across this piece, and since one of your goals is to get us to read the oldies, what could be much older that Ovid:

Metamorphosis VIII, 611-724 Baucis and Philemon

... but I still have no clue...

scratchin' my head Lightly, Daniel

[Merlin]

I thought The Thought.

Merlin

[jgdittier]

Dear Daniel and Merlin,
I rarely do 24 lines line for line but here I did so.
I can find this original in Representative Poetry but get no help when attempting to seek it with key words. PR doesn't let me in, key words wise.
Some clues:
the form is groups of lines of 3-5-5-3-8 and rhyme scheme aabb
nearly pure iambic tetrameter
a paean to the universe
Altho The Thought is a thought, it's not the right thought.
I don't know where to go with key words, one of which would be "divine".
Cheers, Ron jgd

[Merlin]

Dear Ron,
Methinks the line-breaks are not correct in your version, that is, the 5/3 combination makes an 8, and 3 x 8 makes up the 24 line ode.

My version has it as 3 x 8, by the poet whose initials are JA. Somebidy at RPO might have been a bit "spacious", what! Hows that for a thought?

Merlin

[JustDaniel]

Ah, Ron...

and if Eric is correct in that suggestion, I'd read that favorite hymn of mine earlier today! ... and the version I found of the lyrics has it in three stanzas of 8, 12, and 4 lines... so I'd ruled it out, according to your description hints.

At any rate, a beautiful replication of a beautiful hymn... It's firm!... uh... meant it too!

Lightly, Daniel

[Merlin]

Is it hymn - John Addison, JD?

M

ps - I'm not "on high" either.

[jgdittier]

DEar Merlin,
Nicely done!
The spacing I used was as Rep. Poetry had it.
Cheers, Ron jgd

[Merlin]

I'm a-wondering if our different computer/monitor settings make a difference in the appearance of the subject poem - I get 3 x 8 from both first line search, and from author selection.

Joseph Addison, Ode.

Merlin

[jgdittier]

Dear Merlin,
My face is red!
My version came from Poemhunter, the daily poem sent to me by e-mail.I checked RP and it appears as you say.
Now, any comment on the basis for the hint?
Cheers, Ron jgd

[Merlin]

Dear Ron,

Re the hint, the answer is twofold.
1st - yes, that became a clincher.
2nd - it shouldn't have been required cuz I had checked that particular one earlier, but was looking for a tercet to begin things and didn't take a close look.

When I went back for the link, I noticed that it had already a changed color on the hypertext, indicating I had been there previously. I just went too fast.

Poemhunter or not, well done.

M

[jgdittier]

Dear Merlin,
Ah so!
Now, a comment about the Hit Parade?
Cheers, Ron jgd

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hi Ron.

I do not know the author of the original poem, but I enjoyed your response very much. There is so much to like in this piece!

I am most fond of these phrases:

A canopy of stars o'erhead
Before an ebon canvas spread

And demonstrate to all the world
HIS land below the solar curl

Late in the day as darkness calls,
Then luna's lux on flowers falls.

Let's all rejoice, heed His design.
What God has wrought, is all divine!

Here, here.
A lovely poem!
~Cleo

[jgdittier]

Dear Cleo,
The poet is John Addison, the poem, "Ode" and it's at Representative Poetry.
Does it sound silly to say that some poems by the bards of yore can be rewritten
in less than an hour and sound pretty good. Addison's is one of these. That may be why I have such respect for the bards of yore.
(Then again, some don't para easily!)
Cheers, Ron jgd

[JustDaniel]

I do love the hymn, Ron; as I said, one of my very favorites.

And your poem very much does it justice in every way. I sang it all the way through to the majestic hymn-tune that I know with it.

deLightingly, Daniel


P.S. Ofen entitled in hymnals A Spacious Firmament on High