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Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Poetry Forums > Free Verse Poetry for Critique -> Seren's Synapse  |
 Apr 19 16, 13:38
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 Assyrian  Posts: 256 Joined: 2-November 15 From: Croydon, Surrey Member No.: 5,284 Real Name: Antony Glaser Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Eira Rhaposdy  |
From our shell we emerge
scattering words like confetti. We only needed papyrus to safeguard permanence Yesterday had the better scope truthful memory. Instead today seems uncertain, an omen of a bad sunrise follows, delving like a bare Buddha, we've uncoupled Heaven regaling the tongues of shadows. Why such a profusion of imagery ? Hadn't we braved a river, barely emerging we should have woken. ·······  ·······Imagination fires the soul, resolution the longing.
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Apr 20 16, 17:42
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 Mosaic Master  Posts: 4,599 Joined: 4-August 03 From: Birmingham, England Member No.: 12 Real Name: Eira Needham Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Lori |
Hi Antony,
Wonderful imagery in this one. What a wonderful way to begin From our shell we emerge scattering words like confetti. From our shell we emerge scattering words like confetti. We only needed papyrus to safeguard permanence. full stop Yesterday had the better scope, comma truthful memory. Instead today seems uncertain, an omen of a bad sunrise follows, delving like a bare Buddha, we've uncoupled Heaven regaling the tongues of shadows. Why such a profusion of imagery ? Hadn't we braved a river, barely emerging we should have woken. Not much to nit here, Antony Eira ······· ·······Live one day at a time -it's simpler that way.
Laugh loud & often - it's medicinal. Write from the heart - it's therapeutic. Beauty comes from within - the outer is just skin! Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more details, click here! MM Award Winner            |
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Apr 23 16, 04:35
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#3
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Egyptian Posts: 399 Joined: 11-April 13 From: Australia - The great Southern Land Member No.: 5,178 Real Name: Maureen Clifford Writer of: Poetry Referred By:arnfinn |
I really like this poem - it struck a chord with me - especially this line
We only needed papyrus to safeguard permanence I was visualizing ancient Egypt, the Nile area, ancient temples as I read...that maybe at odds with your writing but was the picture clearly etched in my head. Nicely done. Thank you for sharing it. ······· ······· |
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