QUOTE (4rum @ Apr 5 10, 21:49 )
Dear Eisa;
As is the case with Dani, I'm just blown away by the kindness and sincerity I've been shown in this write. I do wish you to also know that I have not been idle through this correspondence. I have read much reference material and many wonderful entries by the very gifted folks here in my studies. I've truly been enriched by this experience and pray that you and all who helped so wonderfully receive a blessing.
Sam
Hi Sam
It is evident by your revision that you have worked hard in the background and I congratulate you again.
I am still unsure of this line though as it doesn't flow so easily
wanton breath vaults breasts clefted shadows Perhaps something like:-
wanton breath vaults
clefted shadows of your breasts
licking at your neck
turned to catch last lightThis is a bit more wordy, but flows of the tongue a little easier.
Take or toss!
Snow