The Case for Candlelight, Enhanced ballad metre Options

[jgdittier]

In candlelight the world seems right
and romance rules the day.
He'll strum the lute before he'll shoot,
ole Cupid has his way.

I wonder why so many sigh,
their love was just a phase?
Does Cupid care if love is there?
Does he deserve our praise?

Let's use our brain and now explain,
it's simply Cupid's sight.
In shadows dim, we can't blame him,
in flick'ring candlelight.

It may be true that love's blind, too,
but Cupid takes the cake.
Now we got through and our love grew,
though arrow wounds still ache.

[AMETHYST]

Bravo ... Bravo ...

Ron, I know you don't want to go in for competitions, but could I just nominate it anyway... :)

This is a great poem. I think I am going to use this as my new Valentine's Anthem! If you wouldn't mind! It is truly fitting to the occasion...

Big hugs and keep these coming, I need something to spark my happy muse!

Liz

[jgdittier]

Dear Amethyst,
I'm delighted you like this one. It was written as a challenge, the topic candlelight. In fact, it originally lacked the last stanza and I was credited with getting the word in both the first and last stanza.

Add this if you like: (stanza 4)
He'll raise his bow and draw it slow.
His aim in darkness drifts.
His arrow darts, its aim departs,
Delivers not its gifts.

Nominate it if you feel it worthy.
Thanks, I'm elated.
Cheers, ron jgd

[AMETHYST]

Thanks Ron,

I've added the additional stanza, placing it in the 4th stanza position. And I've nominated it for IBPC ~ and I thank you for letting me! This is such an enjoyable poem to read, and yet... I connect to both the humorous voice, and the subject (a slight seriousness of going through relationships and the scars they leave behind) ... Very strong piece of poetry...

Best Wishes and again, Thank You! Liz

[jgdittier]

Thanks Ron,

I've added the additional stanza, placing it in the 4th stanza position. And I've nominated it for IBPC ~ and I thank you for letting me! This is such an enjoyable poem to read, and yet... I connect to both the humorous voice, and the subject (a slight seriousness of going through relationships and the scars they leave behind) ... Very strong piece of poetry...

Best Wishes and again, Thank You! Liz

Dear Liz,
That last line, the one about the arrow wounds still aching came as a last thought. The ditty originated as a response to a challenge to write about candlelight. My design is almost always directed towards a smile
and so, later I added the last line as the smile was missing. There was no philosophical thought involved.
Well, maybe it was subconscious!
Cheers, Ron jgd

[AMETHYST]

Hi Ron,

If you look at the post in IBPC please let me know if the sequence of the stanzas (including the newer one added) is how you would like it to be? ... Thanks...

Yes, I figured there wasn't any forced philosophy, but my mother always said, many a truths told in jest... which adds to both the delight and interest of this poem!

Best wishes, Liz

[JustDaniel]

Sheesh...

I can't believe I read this for voting for the IBPC competetion and never even left a comment... but I see that others didn't either, which is almost too hard to believe!

Brava to Liz and Bravo to you. I think maybe you have so few responses is that there's nothing to comment on except that it's pretty much perfect!

Ron, you've gone way past 'light verse' in my view. The depth in your work and study simply seems to get broader and more enticing the further you dig. It's rather a wonderful thing to watch.

Please forgive my lateness, as I've just been so busy of late off the site... and sometimes I forget think that I've posted when I've not. It's rather embarrassing.... and is far less than the supporting role that I love to play. I trust that I'll be seen in that role again; it's where I belong.

deLighting to see that your ballad has been enhanced, Daniel