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> Impossible Watch **
greenwich
post Apr 5 16, 11:12
Post #1


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From: Croydon, Surrey
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Real Name: Antony Glaser
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Eira Rhaposdy



By journey's end the scythes will have rusted.
How they long to be preserved
for gratitude of use.
But such is life
wheat and chaff thrashed
together in the same breath.
The Willows languish by the silted pool
they never had their season.
Just when we thought the highway
would take us
this omen runs.


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Imagination fires the soul, resolution the longing.
 
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Psyche
post Apr 6 16, 02:01
Post #2


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From: Bariloche, Argentine Patagonia
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Real Name: Sylvia Evelyn Maclagan
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:David Ting



Interesting, Antony. Not sure I understand where you're going, but I certainly like your word usage. Just one nit, I think.


QUOTE (greenwich @ Apr 5 16, 13:12 ) *
By journeys end the scythes will have rusted.<<<<<<<journey's
How they long to be preserved
for gratitude of use.
But such is life <<<<<<cliché?
wheat and chaff thrashed
together in the same breath. <<<<<<good biblical ref. 'Separate the wheat from the chaff'...
The Willows languish by the silted pool <<<<<<comma.
they never had their season.
Just when we thought the highway
would take us
this omen runs <<<<<Full stop. Not sure of your meaning, but I like it all the same!

Can you enlighten me a little? Tx, Syl butterfly.gif



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The Lord replied, my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.


"There is no life higher than the grasstops
Or the hearts of sheep, and the wind
Pours by like destiny, bending
Everything in one direction."

Sylvia Plath, Crossing the Water, Wuthering Heights.



Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!

MM Award Winner
 
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greenwich
post Apr 6 16, 11:42
Post #3


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From: Croydon, Surrey
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Real Name: Antony Glaser
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Referred By:Eira Rhaposdy



This is about the road to death and taking into account past justice and future luck needed for this. The scythe is also the human body, the cyclical function of living, thus wheat and chaff are the mixtures in life, the flow of justice


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Psyche
post Apr 7 16, 18:02
Post #4


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Real Name: Sylvia Evelyn Maclagan
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:David Ting



Hi again, Antony,
Now I understand it perfectly, thank you. Should have on my own. Really good, this one.
I like 'wheat and chaff are the mixtures of life' ...quite so, not easy or even possible to separate.
Syl butterfly.gif



QUOTE (greenwich @ Apr 6 16, 14:42 ) *
This is about the road to death and taking into account past justice and future luck needed for this. The scythe is also the human body, the cyclical function of living, thus wheat and chaff are the mixtures in life, the flow of justice



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Mis temas favoritos



The Lord replied, my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.


"There is no life higher than the grasstops
Or the hearts of sheep, and the wind
Pours by like destiny, bending
Everything in one direction."

Sylvia Plath, Crossing the Water, Wuthering Heights.



Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!

MM Award Winner
 
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Psyche
post Apr 7 16, 18:11
Post #5


Ornate Oracle
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Group: Praetorian
Posts: 8,882
Joined: 27-August 04
From: Bariloche, Argentine Patagonia
Member No.: 78
Real Name: Sylvia Evelyn Maclagan
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:David Ting



BTW, where is everybody? I wish Lori, our Administrator, would make an appearance. Poetry websites don't function when the boss is not around. Moderators are not enough. We can only deal with certain matters, such as being vigilant about who comes in, move posts on request or necessity, answer PM's, etc.
I've sent a PM to Lori but received no answer. I think she's OK, because she's busy on Facebook with other interests.
I don't visit FB very often, but might do so to ask her why she's AWOL...

My view is that FB is the downfall of many poetry websites. I've visited some and they're OK, but slow.
But the Admins. are always around, every day. That shows that somebody cares, don't you think?

Syl


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Mis temas favoritos



The Lord replied, my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.


"There is no life higher than the grasstops
Or the hearts of sheep, and the wind
Pours by like destiny, bending
Everything in one direction."

Sylvia Plath, Crossing the Water, Wuthering Heights.



Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!

MM Award Winner
 
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Heather
post Apr 9 16, 04:24
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Real Name: Heather Lazarus
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Rhapsody



I had just read a poem on a similar theme and was just in the mood for this.
L1 is awesome. Perfect. Love it.
I stumbled on L3- I get it, but suggest:

out of gratitude for use

I also found 'but such is life' a bit too colloquial for the piece. If you are really committed to that line, you might consider leaving it as 'such is life'.

I love the ending. A very satisfying piece.

Heather
 
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greenwich
post Apr 9 16, 05:03
Post #7


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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 256
Joined: 2-November 15
From: Croydon, Surrey
Member No.: 5,284
Real Name: Antony Glaser
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Eira Rhaposdy



Thank you Heather and Syl. I am very grateful for your interest in my words.


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Imagination fires the soul, resolution the longing.
 
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Eisa
post Apr 9 16, 18:12
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Posts: 4,599
Joined: 4-August 03
From: Birmingham, England
Member No.: 12
Real Name: Eira Needham
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori



Hi Antony,

Beautiful thoughts here. I love your use of the scythe and the wheat and chaff. It also reminds me of the grim reaper coming with his scythe at the journeys end.

I have to agree that such is life is cliché

These lines are beautiful

The Willows languish by the silted pool
they never had their season.



By journey's end the scythes will have rusted.
How they long to be preserved
for gratitude of use.
But such is life
wheat and chaff thrashed
together in the same breath.
The Willows languish by the silted pool
they never had their season.
Just when we thought the highway
would take us
this omen runs.

I always enjoy your poems, Antony. Short, but filled with plenty to think about

Eira


·······IPB·······

Live one day at a time -it's simpler that way.
Laugh loud & often - it's medicinal.
Write from the heart - it's therapeutic.
Beauty comes from within - the outer is just skin!

Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more details, click here!

MM Award Winner
 
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