Haiku: new perspectives, some thoughts, lessons, links Options

[laryalee]

I've put together a few thoughts and links about
haiku for study and discussion....

The traditional image of haiku based on 5-7-5 syllables
is of course true in Japan. But times have changed,
especially with the internet, and haiku now encompasses
a global community.

A glance at the World Haiku Review (editor Susumu
Takiguchi) indicates how this community is evolving.
Skimming down the left column on link below, under
International Languages, WHR offers several languages
besides Japanese and English:

http://www.worldhaikureview.org/5-1/contents.shtml

Besides having the pattern of each language to deal
with, when translating these haiku into Japanese, a new
problem arises -- one English/Spanish/French syllable can
become two or three in Japanese.
This is one reason why fewer than 17 syllables in English
is the accepted pattern in most Western haiku publications
today.

However, the 5-7-5 pattern is still followed by some, with
excellent results. Here is a link to prize-winning haiku in
such a contest held in 2000, including comments from the
judge, Isamu Hashimoto:

http://www.youngleaves.org/activities/2000contest.htm

(I'm guessing that Michael Dylan Welch's magnolia haiku has
a typo, and "cool" is meant to be on line 3)

As mentioned in the judge's comments, the Mainichi Daily News
has a monthly Haiku Column -- it also sponsors an international
contest each year.

http://mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp/entertainmen...aiku/index.html

In the 10th annual (2006) contest, one of the judges offered
this comment:

"It seems that Japanese haiku have eventually spread widely
around the various countries in America and Europe. It is a shame
that the entries in English and French have come to resemble the
works of Japanese. They are small, prim and affectedly elegant. I
would like to see short poems that make use of the fact that they
are works in foreign languages and more boldly and freely break
through the borders of Japanese ideas and haiku."


Getting back to WHR, in 2001 the ezine began a series of Hibiscus
School lessons by Ferris Gilli. Here is one about juxtapostion --
"The Space Between":

http://www.worldhaikureview.org/2-2/whcsch...lessonwjf.shtml

If you click on "Back" at the bottom of the page, you'll find
another good article on "Clutter and Credibility - Trust between
Reader and Poet".

Here is a link to the beginning Hibiscus lessons (3 pages):

http://www.worldhaikureview.org/1-1/hibiscus1a.shtml

And another excellent topic here, on verbless haiku:

http://www.worldhaikureview.org/1-3/whcsch...lesshaiku.shtml

Again, at the bottom, you'll find links to others...
"Regarding Poetry: the Shape of the Song" by Peggy Willis Lyles,
and "Seasoning Your Haiku" by Ferris.

As a final note, when considering the problems of translation, here
is a delightful page about Basho's famous frog:

http://haikutopics.blogspot.com/2006/06/sound-of-water.html

No wonder the subject of haiku has resulted in so many varying
opinions over the years!


Additional study links:

Jane Reichhold's site:
http://www.ahapoetry.com/haiku.htm

"In the moonlight a worm...":
http://www.haiku.insouthsea.co.uk/

The Haiku Habit:
http://www.haikuhabit.com/index.htm

Mike Rehling has compiled many links here:
http://www.haikuhut.com/Haiku%20Definition.htm


I hope you enjoy the journey!


Lary

P.S. Another article I just discovered, by Keiko Imaoka,
on Jane Reichhold's site (I feel that when a Japanese
poet explains about the syllables, it holds even more
weight!):

http://www.ahapoetry.com/keirule.htm


.

[Eisa]

Hey Lary -- this is great stuff. I haven't written a haiku for a while. I'm off to bed now (1am in UK) but will be back tomorrow to read this more thoroughly.

Thanks Snow

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hey Lary,

Thanks so much for posting this one. I will be coming back to this tile often, trying my hand at haiku and seeing what you masters have to say about my feeble attempts....

You rock!

~Cleo

[Guest_Kathy_*]

Wow Lary, this looks great! Concise yet comprehensive. What a big wide world of haiku there is here! You have a much wider grasp of this world than I do; I haven't read some of these important articles. I'm especially excited about the one re writing in our own languages and breaking through the borders of Japanese. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

There's so much good stuff here I may never get to bed.

Thanks, Lary.

[laryalee]

Snow, Cleo and Kathy...
thank you very much, and I do
hope you'll enjoy exploring the sites!

Perhaps I may add another link here...
for simple enjoyment, I invite you to visit
"a procession of ripples" (Kathy's in it).

It's an anthology I compiled last autumn.
You might like to brew a cup of tea, put on some
soft music, and relax...

http://laryalee.users.sunwave.net/ripples.htm



Lary

[AMETHYST]

Oh Lary,

I just came back from reading in A Procession of Ripples. I was left with a gapping mouth after reading several of them, some are like snapshots of some universal secret captured in words. Amazing. Although I only got up to Sunlight, because Laurens wants pancakes! LOL But I will return later on to finish those off... and read the other links. I am going to try my hand at another Haiku, I remember creating one once and I think you helped me on it. I have to check...

Ah yes, The Haiku Thread at Poetry 911 - Haiku I Know Dave put his heart and soul into that thread. He would also enjoy this as well. The links and information and the opportunity to practice and creat haiku is something he thrives on. He is quite good at them as well.

You had written some remarkable Haiku there as well. I am not sure if you have them, but if not, they are still there... Dave salavaged the thread through his MS File. and reposted every post by hand. :)



Hugs, Liz

[Guest_Cathy_*]

I've made it through 'winter chills'. The Haiku's are great! I think my favorite so far is

August twilight
one wildflower dying
on another one in bloom

Ion Codrescu

I'm confused though. I was taught that Haiku was two perspectives of one picture and I don't see that in some of the ones I've read.

Cathy

[laryalee]

Hi Liz, I'm so glad you're enjoying Ripples!
And I had forgotten all about Poetry 911...
such a long time ago! Thanks very much
for the link!


Hi Cathy,
there may well be some poets who lean toward
that theory, but none among the haiku community
that I'm familiar with.
This link on juxtaposition might explain it:

http://www.worldhaikureview.org/2-2/whcsch...lessonwjf.shtml


Lary

[Guest_Cathy_*]

Thanks for posting that link Lary! I'm going to reread it but I think I get the idea. This was one of my earlier attempts... is it or isn't it? LOL


whispering silence
graceful as cascading silk
winter drifts earthward

Cathy

[laryalee]

Hi Cathy...
what lovely images --
fragile beauty and delicate sounds!

Ok, a couple of thoughts...
Haiku tends to avoid simile and metaphor...
instead, relying on images that allow the
reader to make her/his own connection.

Also, "whispering silence" and "winter drifts"
feel a bit too abstract and poetic for haiku --
concrete visuals are encouraged.
(And realism: if there are whispers, can
there be silence?)

To play a little, what if it's reworded so the
silk could possibly refer to actual fabric:

cascading silk...
the silence of snow
drifting earthward

Does this open the door to the hint of other
images, other meanings?

Now it's probably not at all what you had in mind...
it's just an example!



Lary

[Guest_Kathy_*]

What a wonderful suggestion, Lary! Now it is a haiku.

[Guest_Cathy_*]

This is soooo very different from what I thought! LOL

I do like what you did with mine. It's the same idea I had, just worded differently. Actually I think your suggestion gives it clarity that it didn't have before. Hmmm... I may have to give this another shot!

Cathy

[Guest_Cathy_*]

Okay, what about...

pearl in an oyster;
protected within your heart
is the gem of love

Cathy

[laryalee]

Hi Cathy,
my apologies for my slow response...
I had a busy weekend!

Your pearl is a lovely image!
However, it seems to be telling me everything...
in haiku, what is unsaid is as important as what
is said.
Thinking of someone you love while gazing at
a pearl in an oyster is a beautiful thought.
How could you show this, rather than
tell us?
Also, haiku stresses the moment of now...lines
2 and 3 feel more like a general comment?


pearl in an oyster --
the touch of his hand
on my shoulder

pearl in an oyster --
the lingering scent
of his aftershave

Does something like this let the reader sense love?

Or perhaps that gem of love relates to a child...

pearl in an oyster --
her small hand
clasping mine

Here's a winning haiku where love is shown, rather than told:

http://www.theheronsnest.com/haiku/0804q22...n_issue.c1.html

And there are more hints among the topics in the links in my original post...



Lary

[Guest_Kathy_*]

That's a wonderful reply, Lary. You are teaching me also.

origamo

[Cleo_Serapis]

This is fantastic!

I have an idea in mind for haiku, but not sure how best to forumulate my thoughts?

My theme in mind is 'wind chimes' - my thought is how I love the sounds they make when the spring winds set them of in concert - it reminds me of times when I was young and the sounds would make me fall asleep or put me in such a contented state of mind.

Concerted wind chimes
ignite spring's reminscence
contented ovation

I know this is not very good - but I'd love feedback and will toss this theme out to you readers to create your own with this theme (and of course, help me along too).

~Cleo (in training)

[laryalee]

Hi Cleo...
wind chimes is a wonderful theme!
And memories are difficult to work into
a haiku while still keeping to the present
moment.
If you think back again to those chimes...
how you felt, was the sun shining, was there
a scent of flowers, etc.?

I know that I put too many links up top, but
Jeanne Emrich's Haiku Habit is a great place
to start:

http://www.haikuhabit.com/index.htm


And it would be fun to have a place for all
short forms...haiku, tanka, cinquain, etc...
These long threads take so long to load --
it would be nice to be able to work on haiku
one at a time!



Lary

[Guest_Kathy_*]

What a wonderful idea, Lary.

his fingers
on the keys --
windchimes

or

windchimes --
his fingers
on the keys

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hi Cleo... wind chimes is a wonderful theme! And memories are difficult to work into a haiku while still keeping to the present moment.
If you think back again to those chimes... how you felt, was the sun shining, was there a scent of flowers, etc.?

I know that I put too many links up top, but Jeanne Emrich's Haiku Habit is a great place to start:

http://www.haikuhabit.com/index.htm


And it would be fun to have a place for all short forms...haiku, tanka, cinquain, etc... These long threads take so long to load --
it would be nice to be able to work on haiku one at a time!



Lary

Hello Lary. Thanks for the newest link! I am reading the 'guidelines for edit' section now. Avoid cause and effect, Say what you mean, Provide only what is essential, Follow the order of perception, Engage the senses - and so much more! This is great!

So.... I am still on the wind chimes theme here:

whispered wind chimes
cleanse winter's lethargy --
peaceful concerto

Or maybe something like:
whispered wind chimes
cleanse winter's lethargy --
arousing inner-frolic *I think this one is cause and effect though :(

As to your query on short forms - do you mean creating a new critique forum specifically for short forms?
~Cleo

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hmm - or what about:


whispered wind chimes
His perennial songs --
simple pleasures

OR

whispered wind chimes
His perennial voice --
inner contentment