Strange Day {CR - ***} Options

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Strange Day

I was up before the sun
laying out my morning clothes,
wondering where I was,
whom to thank for my bed,
bath, and last nights repast.

As I upped and out the door to go,
I looked, where was my road?
I see no path; do I go left or right?
Does anyone here know?

I am high up in the mountains,
and the ocean's far below...

I don't know, well I don't know.

There was no one here to talk with,
there is no one here I know.
Just the company of strangers
I met along the row,
who avert their faces
as if in fear. They don't
speak like me, you know.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dreary dear.

How do I get directions?
How can I foretell?
What is wrong, what is right,
where do I find the guiding light?
To illuminate my darkening way,
it's been such a grave unusual day.

I'd post a letter, let them know
I'm on my way.
But I have no paper, no pen, no envelope
nor stamp.
My eyes are getting damp,
'cause I don't know what I'd have to say,
anyway.

To them I was a child, a young man
insipid, uninteresting, just a kid.
Although I have grown
from the seed that was sown.
I am old enough to be out, on my own,
all alone.

No time to phone, just no time to phone.

6 June 2010
© Steve Pray

I changed some words and punctuation.

[Psyche]

Oh Steve, I've just read your poem in a rush before bedtime, and right now I can only say that it offers up impressive ideas, but needs quite a bit of trimming.

It gets better after the first stanzas. It instills a sort of desperation in me, as in those dreams where you never quite catch the train or bus!

But I think it's a poem about dying before the MC can say goodbyes or warn people that he/she is on her way....where?

Hugs, I'll be back, hope you don't mind my comments, Steve.

Syl***

[Kimi]

Hi Steve -

I noticed you use a varied syllable count and some lines rhyme and some do not. The first thing that came to my mind was a person with Alzheimers. I am very interested in the meaning of your poem. I am intrigued.

hugs
kimi

[merle]

Hi Steve -

This poem could very well have several interpetations and perhaps you set it up that way. My only suggestion would be to smooth it out with rhythm or syllable count and remove those pesky typos.

Robin

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Sylvia, you are always welcome to comment, critique, or just to say hi, or hey you. To tell you the truth, I am not sure what it is all about either.... it just came to me in a sort of semi haze, half awake half asleep thinking about something else and these words just intruded, I think i could have written another page in my notebook but my fingers were cramping... I really can't look at it just yet as I need some time before I can be objective.
I hope you are resting up after your hectic days with all the relatives.

Kimi, thanks for reading and your comments, I rarely ever count silly bulls, and yes some rhyme and some don't, I call it rhyming free verse...it feels right to me of course it is open to interpretation and I am open to change, as for the meaning... read the reply above to Sylvia.

Robin, Sorry, I found only one typo, 'for(e)tell' I fixed it. Yes it could have very many interpretations and as far as I am concerned what ever you put on it is fine with me. As you can read above, I am not sure myself so how can I say that yours is wrong? I do appreciate your reading and your comments.

I don't mean to be rude but I have just about stopped writing for anyone but myself anymore, if someone else enjoys it that is a bonus, if they don't like it ... oh well. I just found my DVD With all my poems. I now have 856 that I have saved. Not very much, seems like I should have more...
Thank you all for comments.

Take Care
Steve

[Kimi]

Hi Steve
I don't think you are being rude at all, it is far better to write for yourself. I like the free verse. And writing what comes to mind. Don't stop.
Hugs kimi