Welcome Guest ( Log In | Register )

IPB
 
Reply to this topicStart new topic
> Naughty Loan **, response Sonnet to Larry's "Not Alone"
JustDaniel
post Jul 2 17, 20:09
Post #1


Ornate Oracle
******

Group: Gold Member
Posts: 12,784
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori



... a specific response to Larry's fine sonnet, Not Alone in Hermes


Naughty Loan

I too am so impressed to read your work;
It seems that I've neglected reading here.
So here I am and trouncing like a jerk,
I leave the path and venture without fear

of stepping on your feet or on some home
of insects, vermin, birds or who knows what
to wander off where'er my eyes may roam
and run or play or simply rest my butt.

A cautious step is something that I've not
been taught, perhaps is now too late to learn.
If I go on like this, will I be caught
and sent away to somewhere I will burn

forever for my lacking social skills
and racking up so many hidden kills?

© MLeeDickensson 23 June 2017

in response to Larry D. Jennings' Not Alone


·······IPB·······

Slow down; things will go faster!

MM Award Winner
 
+Quote Post  Go to the top of the page
Ali zonak
post Jul 3 17, 07:50
Post #2


Babylonian
*

Group: Gold Member
Posts: 91
Joined: 22-June 17
From: Arizona, USA
Member No.: 5,325
Real Name: Ali Zonak
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:none



Very humorous, Daniel;
good clean fun. I might question the rhyme "what and butt." "What" sounds okay in conjunction with the softer "but,"
However, it's still a passable near-rhyme. Delighted to read your sonnet, charliebrown.gif Ali


·······IPB·······

~~~~
It is a poem’s absolute perfection that can lead to its imperfection.
~~~~
 
+Quote Post  Go to the top of the page
Eisa
post Jul 4 17, 17:23
Post #3


Mosaic Master
Group Icon

Group: Praetorian
Posts: 4,599
Joined: 4-August 03
From: Birmingham, England
Member No.: 12
Real Name: Eira Needham
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori



You and Larry are certainly the sonneteers of MM, Daniel. This one is good fun! Enjoyed.

Eira


·······IPB·······

Live one day at a time -it's simpler that way.
Laugh loud & often - it's medicinal.
Write from the heart - it's therapeutic.
Beauty comes from within - the outer is just skin!

Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more details, click here!

MM Award Winner
 
+Quote Post  Go to the top of the page
JustDaniel
post Jul 6 17, 00:11
Post #4


Ornate Oracle
******

Group: Gold Member
Posts: 12,784
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori



QUOTE (Ali zonak @ Jul 3 17, 07:50 ) *
Very humorous, Daniel;
good clean fun. I might question the rhyme "what and butt." "What" sounds okay in conjunction with the softer "but,"
However, it's still a passable near-rhyme. Delighted to read your sonnet, charliebrown.gif Ali

Thanks, Ali. I do like to write response pieces, and humor is something built-in for me.

I'm curious how you may pronounce "butt"; I have always pronounced it exactly as "but"... and least it's that way where I grew up and in each of the places I've lived: WA state, southern CA, W. Florida, Phila suburbs, South Jersey. I'll be very interested in your answer, since I can't imagine how else it is pronounced.

deLighting in your sharing, Daniel sun.gif


·······IPB·······

Slow down; things will go faster!

MM Award Winner
 
+Quote Post  Go to the top of the page
JustDaniel
post Jul 6 17, 00:14
Post #5


Ornate Oracle
******

Group: Gold Member
Posts: 12,784
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori



QUOTE (Eisa @ Jul 4 17, 17:23 ) *
You and Larry are certainly the sonneteers of MM, Daniel. This one is good fun! Enjoyed.

Eira

It's an honor to be mentioned in the same sentence with Larry. I'm glad that you appreciated the fun, Eira!

deLightingly, Daniel sun.gif


·······IPB·······

Slow down; things will go faster!

MM Award Winner
 
+Quote Post  Go to the top of the page
Larry
post Jul 6 17, 09:25
Post #6


Creative Chieftain
******

Group: Gold Member
Posts: 9,448
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.



Hi Daniel,

Yes, I did read, laugh at and enjoy your retort to my “Not Alone” and appreciate the links you provided for the reader in reference to my sonnet. You have me blushing with your statement that you feel honored to be mentioned in the same sentence with myself when it comes to sonnets. To be able to come up with even a tongue-in-cheek response is, to me, very admirable. You ain’t no slouch when it comes to writing sonnets. I’d have to say, “right back at you” because I admire all your work; even the off-the-wall stuff we trade with each other over in Karnak.

Larry


·······IPB·······

When power leads man toward arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the areas of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy



Kindness is a seed sown by the gentlest hand, growing care's flowers.
Larry D. Jennings

MM Award Winner
 
+Quote Post  Go to the top of the page
JustDaniel
post Jul 6 17, 13:09
Post #7


Ornate Oracle
******

Group: Gold Member
Posts: 12,784
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori



... and it's a joy to do so, Larry!

deLightingly, Daniel sun.gif


·······IPB·······

Slow down; things will go faster!

MM Award Winner
 
+Quote Post  Go to the top of the page
1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
0 Members:

Reply to this topicStart new topic

 

RSS Lo-Fi Version Time is now: 18th October 2019 - 18:05




Read our FLYERS - click below



Reference links provided to aid in fine-tuning your writings. ENJOY!

more Quotes
more Art Quotes
Dictionary.com ~ Thesaurus.com

Search:
for
Type in a word below to find its rhymes, synonyms, and more:

Word: