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> Cryptic Chrysalis, Revised 01 May ~ thanks Liz!
Cleo_Serapis
post Apr 14 05, 18:49
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Mosaic Master
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From: Massachusetts
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Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep



Cryptic Chrysalis


Days are made longer
by a longing to belong...


Dusk turns detestable
in shadowy guise,
left to rot in a cryptic
chrysalis...


Out of the wakening
an epiphanous light
proffers in kind;


wings widen
to nurture faculties
unfocused…


only to be
traumatized by truth
veiled in fallacious vows.


© 2005 Lorraine M Kanter






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"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings

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"I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter

Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!

"Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.

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Cleo_Serapis
post Apr 17 05, 13:22
Post #2


Mosaic Master
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Group: Administrator
Posts: 18,892
Joined: 1-August 03
From: Massachusetts
Member No.: 2
Real Name: Lori Kanter
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Imhotep



QUOTE(Billydo @ April 17 2005, 04:02)
Hi Lori

James suggested that I crit away and not to worry about making a fool of myself.

Firstly, I really enjoyed this poem. Why cryptic though, and why rot? A chrysalis is usually associated with birth, transformation and regeneration, not rotting. Faculties unfocused, implies potential. My interpretation is that this is about words longing to be butted up to other words, locked away waiting to be used, brought out and then thrown away in meaningless sentences (just like a politician would use methinks).

I doubt that this is what you had in mind but I thought in abstract terms and came up with this. Regardless, I thought this an excellent poem.

Cheers

Mike

Hello Mike.  :wave:

Good suggestion - why would you make a fool of yourself? Just go with your impressions as I do...  :vic:

By 'cryptic', I mean hidden/obscure. A being that is just about to enter into a new environment, unknown territory as it were. SOme do not realize this undertaking.

By 'rot' I mean to reference that we all need LIGHT to grow, survive - light can also indicate a hope in faith of God. IN this environment, there is very little LIGHT to shine through.  :sun:

Yes - you have grasped my message. Words not only to be read, but to be heard and understood. Politics of another kind...

You are 100% spot-on in your interpretation. Congrats - I feel better too!  :cheer:

Thanks for your visit today Mike,
~Cleo  :pharoah:


·······IPB·······

"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings

Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind.

"I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter

Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!

"Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.

MM Award Winner
 
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Posts in this topic
- Cleo_Serapis   Cryptic Chrysalis   Apr 14 05, 18:49
- - Nina   Hi Lori There is a sad despairing feel to this po...   Apr 15 05, 01:07
- -   Dear Nina, Days are made longer by a longing to b...   Apr 15 05, 02:00
- - Nina   Hi Alan I think the long - in 3 different way, is...   Apr 15 05, 02:41
- -   Dear Nina, "you are probably right.  It was ...   Apr 15 05, 04:28
- - Jox   Hi Lori, This is more an appreciation, than a cri...   Apr 15 05, 04:35
- - Ephiny   Hello Lori This is beautifully written, and as ...   Apr 15 05, 12:26
- - Billydo   Hi Lori James suggested that I crit away and not ...   Apr 17 05, 03:02
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Nina @ April 15 2005, 02:07)Hi Lori Th...   Apr 17 05, 12:08
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Alan @ April 15 2005, 03:00)Dear Nina, ...   Apr 17 05, 12:14
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Jox @ April 15 2005, 05:35)Hi Lori, Th...   Apr 17 05, 13:03
- - Jox   Hi Lori... Sorry about your thumb - nasty. (Was i...   Apr 17 05, 13:08
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Ephiny @ April 15 2005, 13:26)Hello Lor...   Apr 17 05, 13:12
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Jox @ April 17 2005, 14:08)[b]Hi Lori.....   Apr 17 05, 13:25
- - Toumai   Hi Cleo, This poem made me very uncomfortable whe...   Apr 21 05, 00:56
- - Siren   Hey Lori, Reading this made me feel a kind of bar...   Apr 24 05, 18:26
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Toumai @ April 21 2005, 01:56)Hi Cleo, ...   Apr 24 05, 18:50
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Siren @ April 24 2005, 19:26)Hey Lori, ...   Apr 24 05, 18:54
- - AMETHYST   Wow Lori, This is a very dramatic and powerful p...   Apr 25 05, 20:50
- - Cybele   Dear Lori, This one appeared while I was on holid...   Apr 26 05, 04:25
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(AMETHYST @ April 25 2005, 21:50)Wow Lor...   May 1 05, 12:58
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Cybele @ April 26 2005, 05:25)Dear Lori...   May 1 05, 13:04

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