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> THE FLAME, Sonnet for Ralph
Cybele
post Oct 11 03, 03:00
Post #1


Ornate Oracle
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 3,660
Joined: 23-August 03
From: Somerset, England
Member No.: 22
Real Name: Grace
Writer of: Poetry & Prose



FIRST REVISION


THE FLAME


Between first meeting and our last goodbye,
are days in which I’ll tend my most true flame,
that it may neither sear your loving face with its
white heat, nor by neglect or my inconstancy
leave you cold. In love’s name
let my gentle fire live in your embrace.


Love is not love, that uncontrolled, consumes
its source of fuel with jealousy and greed,
nor unattended, chokes with noxious fumes
the loving heart on which it needs must feed.

So like the crucible, which holds the gold
protected from the furnace blast – I will,
with tender warmth, your treasured love enfold
until your need of me it quiet and still.



"All rights reserved by Grace Galton as an unpublished work."


·······IPB·······

Love

Grace


http://mysite.orange.co.uk/graceingreece

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.


Nominate a tile for the Crown Jewels and Faery Awards today! For details, go to the Valley of the Kings!



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Cybele
post Oct 11 03, 06:03
Post #2


Ornate Oracle
******

Group: Gold Member
Posts: 3,660
Joined: 23-August 03
From: Somerset, England
Member No.: 22
Real Name: Grace
Writer of: Poetry & Prose



Greetings O Great One bowdown.gif

You are quite right of course Akh.  This is not a true representation of a sonnet (except in line form).

My only defence is that I wrote this many, many years ago in the first throes of love (still burning brightly) for Ralph.

At that time, I knew nothing about verse form and the rules of poetry, I wrote this purely as my heart dictated it. (God, that sounds so cheesy, but I can't help it - and will not defend it). That is how I felt but more importantly that is what I wanted him to know. It still holds true, even now.

I love your version Akh, such a talent to come back with this so quickly. Your is very Will S (my idol) cloud9.gif

Love

Grace farmer.gif wave.gif


·······IPB·······

Love

Grace


http://mysite.orange.co.uk/graceingreece

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.


Nominate a tile for the Crown Jewels and Faery Awards today! For details, go to the Valley of the Kings!



MM Award Winner
 
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