 Wanderlust **, an Alternating Sonnet |
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Poetry Forums > Fixed Form and Rhyming Poetry for Critique -> Herme's Homilies
 Jul 19 14, 10:13
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 Mosaic Master  Posts: 18,892 Joined: 1-August 03 From: Massachusetts Member No.: 2 Real Name: Lori Kanter Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Imhotep  |
Wanderlust
She greets the morn' with tantalizing grace and flits along an unsuspecting breeze. Her wonderland awaits. Moments she'd freeze if only she could find her long-lost place. Among a floral canvas, splendor calls where boundaries are scaled. No longer walls preclude her progress; winsome turns she'll drift! Entwined within bright blooms, she hides her face and dines on woodland's nectar. She's a tease! Companions of the glen can never seize her boundless will. Yet, always there's a trace . . . And when her time has come to pass, we'll see true loveliness preserved: Perception's gift and wonder if somehow, she could be me. Copyright © Lorraine M Kanter 15 July 2014 ·······  ·······"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!  "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner           |
  
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Aug 1 14, 23:18
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 Ornate Oracle  Posts: 10,025 Joined: 27-August 04 From: Bariloche, Argentine Patagonia Member No.: 78 Real Name: Sylvia Evelyn Maclagan Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:David Ting |
Hi Lori!
 What delicately inspiring lines in this beautiful sonnet! I'd been here before but without time to read it carefully, as it fully deserves. On this visit I like it even more.  I don't nit F&R poetry; as you know, I'm always a learner, the eternal student...LOL But I can suggest words for you to ToT, according to your rhyme pattern. Yep!  QUOTE (Cleo_Serapis @ Jul 19 14, 12:13 )  Wanderlust She greets the morn’ with tantalizing grace <<<<<<Lovely line! and flits along an unsuspecting breeze. <<<<<I like personalized breeze. Her wonderland awaits. Moments she’d freeze<<<<<delights? events? degrees? allure? I realize these suggestions change the meaning, but perhaps would make the line flow better? Either in singular or plural. ToT!! if only she could find her long-lost place. Among a floral canvas, splendor calls <<<<<< I know, or think, canvas is metaphorical, but "among a floral canvas" trips me up! where boundaries are scaled. No longer walls preclude her progress; winsome turns she’ll drift! Charming stanza. I love the word winsome! Entwined within bright blooms, she hides her face and dines on woodland’s nectar. She’s a tease! Companions of the glen can never seize her boundless will. Yet, always there’s a trace . . . And when her time has come to pass, we’ll see true loveliness preserved: Perception’s gift and wonder if somehow, she could be me. <<<<LOL...of course! Great finale. Copyright © Lorraine M Kanter 15 July 2014 I'm absolutely enthralled by your sonnet, Lori. Bring on more, please. We've missed you a lot. And when you have a mo', do drop over the wall and post some of your great FV. Jerry and I have been keeping that side moving a little, but he's said he won't keep on posting. Take a peek, please do. Jerry says he'll keep in touch, but it's a shame he's moving on. Big hugs, Syl*** ······· ·······Mis temas favoritos
The Lord replied, my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you. "There is no life higher than the grasstops Or the hearts of sheep, and the wind Pours by like destiny, bending Everything in one direction." Sylvia Plath, Crossing the Water, Wuthering Heights. Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner     |
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Posts in this topic
Cleo_Serapis Wanderlust ** Jul 19 14, 10:13 
jerryk Hi Lori,
now let's see who the mysterious ... Jul 19 14, 17:27 
Cleo_Serapis QUOTE (jerryk @ Jul 19 14, 18:27 ) Hi Lor... Jul 21 14, 07:27 Thoth Mmh . . .who is this minuscule ethereal spirit? I ... Jul 20 14, 01:32 Cleo_Serapis QUOTE (Thoth @ Jul 20 14, 02:32 ) Mmh . .... Jul 21 14, 07:35 Keith Logan Hi Lorri,
as usual, I enjoy your writing and find... Aug 5 14, 02:28 Cleo_Serapis Why hello Keith!
Hahaha - I find my writing ... Aug 10 14, 14:38 Cleo_Serapis Why hello Sylvia and thanks for dropping into my ... Aug 10 14, 14:33 1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
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