 Prince in Disguise, Aging. Please crit*** |
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Poetry Forums > Free Verse Poetry for Critique -> Seren's Synapse
 Oct 19 13, 23:58
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 Ornate Oracle  Posts: 10,013 Joined: 27-August 04 From: Bariloche, Argentine Patagonia Member No.: 78 Real Name: Sylvia Evelyn Maclagan Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:David Ting  |
 I love you in your ludicrous underwear, diapers and socks notwithstanding; half-moon specs awry on the tip of your nose, add just the right touch to that bib with blue bears in rows. I love your mortal guise -or the Prince in a Beast’s disguise- and wince with compassion for my elderly nurseling. Perhaps each Rose that turned to gall blossomed from a paradox of parts. Crimson petals ....... soft as Indian silk ..............fade .....................and dart away… Beauty also unrobed the Beast. The charm was broken and a handsome Prince stood before her. Except, you’re a clumsy prince ....... who subsists ..............only .....................in my desolate heart. © Sylvia Evelyn, Buenos Aires, Argentina. 2013 Note: Changed lonesome to desolate in last line. ·······  ·······Mis temas favoritos
The Lord replied, my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you. "There is no life higher than the grasstops Or the hearts of sheep, and the wind Pours by like destiny, bending Everything in one direction." Sylvia Plath, Crossing the Water, Wuthering Heights. Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner              |
  
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Oct 22 13, 17:13
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 Mosaic Master Posts: 4,599 Joined: 4-August 03 From: Birmingham, England Member No.: 12 Real Name: Eira Needham Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Lori |
A tremendously moving poem, Syl, which stirred up all kinds of emotions for me. It's very well written and I love the interspersed bits & pieces.
I'll have to come back to this - I see nothing to nit at the moment. Hugs Snow 
······· ·······Live one day at a time -it's simpler that way.
Laugh loud & often - it's medicinal. Write from the heart - it's therapeutic. Beauty comes from within - the outer is just skin! Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more details, click here! MM Award Winner    |
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Oct 27 13, 01:38
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Ornate Oracle Posts: 10,013 Joined: 27-August 04 From: Bariloche, Argentine Patagonia Member No.: 78 Real Name: Sylvia Evelyn Maclagan Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:David Ting |
Thank you, Eisa. I think I was feeling emotional after sharing time with hubby. I tend to remember the good (and some bad) times, and wonder why things should turn out like this.  Afterwards, I mean. While I'm with him I'm too busy wiping his fingers and mouth, as well as being amazed at his tremendous appetite!  I'm so terribly busy planning our move to Patagonia! I finally got LAN CHILE airline to accept him on a flight. But it meant filling in so many forms and getting certificates...oh my! And even at the last moment, if stewards think he's misbehaving or not looking well, they can still ask us to get off the plane. Politely, I hope.  And at check-in I'll have to sign a form releasing the airline of any responsibility should Carlos have a health problem during the 2-hour flight. He's quite stable nowadays, but who knows? Wish us luck and thanks for visiting, hugs, Syl***  QUOTE (Eisa @ Oct 22 13, 20:13 )  A tremendously moving poem, Syl, which stirred up all kinds of emotions for me. It's very well written and I love the interspersed bits & pieces. I'll have to come back to this - I see nothing to nit at the moment. Hugs Snow ······· ·······Mis temas favoritos
The Lord replied, my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you. "There is no life higher than the grasstops Or the hearts of sheep, and the wind Pours by like destiny, bending Everything in one direction." Sylvia Plath, Crossing the Water, Wuthering Heights. Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner |
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Posts in this topic
Psyche Prince in Disguise Oct 19 13, 23:58 
saore QUOTE Perhaps
each Rose that turned to gall
blos... Oct 20 13, 10:36 
Psyche Thank you very much, Sergio, for your encouraging ... Oct 27 13, 01:22 Cleo_Serapis Hi Sylvia,
A moving poem with just the right touc... Oct 27 13, 09:40 Psyche Thank you so much, Lori, for the nom. I don't ... Oct 28 13, 00:04 Cleo_Serapis Hi Sylvia,
YAY! Glad you approve the nod... Oct 28 13, 05:44 saore The more I read this one the more it draws me in. ... Oct 27 13, 15:14 Psyche Thanks again, Sergio. You lift my spirits.
I love... Oct 28 13, 00:06 Eisa Hi Syl
I am so pleased this has been nominated. I... Oct 28 13, 18:02 Psyche Thanks so much, Lori and Eisa, for your help!
... Oct 30 13, 02:27 Cleo_Serapis Hi Syl,
I won't send it in with the dots. I p... Oct 30 13, 06:22 Larry Hi Syl,
Don't get over here much but I'm ... Oct 30 13, 13:14 Psyche Hi Larry,
I'm delighted that you came over to ... Nov 3 13, 01:00 Cleo_Serapis Oh good catch Larry. Syl asked me to add that chan... Nov 1 13, 06:15 Sekhmet Dear Syl, - I came late to this feast of a poem -... Feb 23 14, 14:28 Psyche Oh my, Leo, true love is a wonderful thing, but ho... Feb 26 14, 16:43 Eisa Hi Syl,
I came back to have another read of this ... Feb 26 14, 18:18 Psyche Thank you, Eira, for your good vibes, sent so long... Jun 4 14, 23:42 jerryk QUOTE (Psyche @ Oct 19 13, 21:58 )
I lo... Jun 5 14, 08:59 Psyche Hi Jerry!
It seems I missed this comment from... Jul 6 14, 23:31 Eisa Wow! Syl - Snow! Were just coming into sum... Jun 6 14, 14:59 Psyche Yes, it's strange now that I've moved furt... Jul 6 14, 23:09 1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
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