Summers Day [revised 06 Sep] Options

[Arnfinn]

With thanks to Lori.

Revision 18/09/2008


Footsteps: tread gently.
Bees a-buzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Aphids in white jackets.
Flowers; confusion of colour.
A hot summer's breeze-
on my cheek.



Revision 6th September 2008


Footsteps; tread gently,
bees a-buzz,
aphid's in white jackets,
flowers, confusions of colour.

A hot summers breeze-
on my cheek.



REVISION. AS summers day 4/9/2008


summers day

st
r
o
ll
i
ng
t
h
r
o
u
gh
t
h
e
g
a
r
d
en
i
n
s
e
c
t
s
m
o
v
i
ng
w
o
r
k
i
ng
d
id
y
ou
h
e
ar
t
h
at?
h
e
a
r
w
h
at!
t
h
e
.
.
.
h
o
t
b
r
ee
z
e
S
N
I
FF
I
NG



i neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeever promised YYYYYYYYYYYYYou a Rose Garden.

john


Summers Day


S
t
r
o
ll
i
n
g

t
h
r
o
u
g
h

t
h
e

g
a
r
d
e
n,

i
n
s
e
c
t
s

m
o
v
i
n
g,

w
o
r
k
i
n
g.

Did you hear that?

Hear what!

T
h
e

h
o
t

b
r
ee
z
e

S
N
I
F
F
I
N
G...


Arnfinn

[Maggie]

Hi John,

I agree with Snow. This poem certainly has changed! Wow! What a fine final version!

I have one teeny, tiny nit to pick! "Summer's" should have an apostrophe to show ownership. Summer owns the day.

Great revision!!!

Peggy