 Words [Rev 2, 27 Oct], Rhyme in Heptameter |
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Archives > Archives > ARCHIVES -> Poetry for Crit Prior to 2011
 Oct 12 07, 09:06
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 Creative Chieftain  Posts: 11,722 Joined: 15-June 07 From: Springfield, Louisiana Member No.: 446 Real Name: Larry D. Jennings Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Just wondered in.  |
Revision #2 (thanks to Mary, Merlin & Amythyst)
Words Strange lines, woven together in an odd, haphazard way, are writhing on with twists and turns. Across the centuries they’re painted, coarsely carved in caves; all meaning lost today, or finely penned on parchment in precise calligraphy‘s revealing goodness, evil, love or hatred, truth or lies; reside where they’re ensconced, awaiting one who understands. When heralding a birth or etched in stone at one’s demise, each line is new. Though used before by many different hands; they’re easily affordable to paupers and to kings. The cost is naught but knowledge of their structure and portent. Lines neither know the smiles or tears their convolution brings, nor wait, with baited breath, returns, from where they’re sometimes sent. From animal caricatures to geometric forms, these lines give meaning to a thought, a way, a time or place. Linguistically elusive, yet their shape, like mother’s arms; when understood, brings to the mind the Words in warm embrace. Dedicated to Wordsmiths everywhere and everywhen. ·······  ·······When power leads man toward arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the areas of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy Kindness is a seed sown by the gentlest hand, growing care's flowers. Larry D. Jennings MM Award Winner       |
  
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Oct 17 07, 08:05
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Creative Chieftain Posts: 11,722 Joined: 15-June 07 From: Springfield, Louisiana Member No.: 446 Real Name: Larry D. Jennings Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Just wondered in. |
Hi Snow,
Like I told John, old habits are difficult to break/change. Does "imo" mean "in my opinion"? Looks like something one would use in text messaging. Anyway, thank you for your kind words on my choice of rhyme. May I please correct you on the quantity of "feet" in each line? There are seven, making it, as stated, a rhyme in heptameter whereas pentameter has only five.  Larry ······· ·······When power leads man toward arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the areas of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy Kindness is a seed sown by the gentlest hand, growing care's flowers. Larry D. Jennings MM Award Winner |
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Oct 18 07, 03:17
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 Mosaic Master  Posts: 4,599 Joined: 4-August 03 From: Birmingham, England Member No.: 12 Real Name: Eira Needham Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Lori |
Hi Larry - My mistake (writing in a hurry) of course this is heptameter, which is more diffficult than pentameter. Yes imo does mean in my opinion. I agree that old habits die hard - I never used to use enjambment at all - found it difficult, now that I've got used to it I use it more frequently.
Nice revision - I'm wondering if some of the semicolons could be replace by commas - seems to be a lot of them. Just a thought! Snow 
······· ·······Live one day at a time -it's simpler that way.
Laugh loud & often - it's medicinal. Write from the heart - it's therapeutic. Beauty comes from within - the outer is just skin! Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more details, click here! MM Award Winner        |
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Oct 19 07, 23:39
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Creative Chieftain Posts: 11,722 Joined: 15-June 07 From: Springfield, Louisiana Member No.: 446 Real Name: Larry D. Jennings Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Just wondered in. |
Snow,
Good thought! You're probably right about the semicolons. My punctuation skills have never been a strong point. I might figuratively shout to my MM peers: "Is There An English Teacher In The House?". If so, HELP ME, PLEASE!  Thank you, Larry ······· ·······When power leads man toward arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the areas of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy Kindness is a seed sown by the gentlest hand, growing care's flowers. Larry D. Jennings MM Award Winner |
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Posts in this topic
Larry Words [Rev 2, 27 Oct] Oct 12 07, 09:06 
Merlin Hi Larry,
I would encourage fewer end-stopped pair... Oct 13 07, 12:47 
Larry Merlin,
(What an appropriate name) for you are a w... Oct 14 07, 08:09 Eisa Hi Larry
Well done at writing this in pentameter ... Oct 17 07, 03:53 Nada Lott Hi Larry. I have the feeling we've met before... Oct 21 07, 14:33 Merlin Hi again, Larry,
Tis I once again. Let me attack... Oct 21 07, 22:26 AMETHYST Hi Larry,
I am beginning to look forward to snea... Oct 21 07, 23:48 Larry Hello Mary, Merlin & Amethyst,
Now that is wha... Oct 26 07, 23:11 Nada Lott Ah, yes, the longest poem. The Lost Episode. The... Oct 27 07, 09:31 1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
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