 A Second Chance, ...at life, family, friends |
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Archives > Archives > ARCHIVES -> Poetry for Crit Prior to 2011  |
 Aug 13 04, 11:54
Post
#1
|
|
 Ornate Oracle  Posts: 4,592 Joined: 31-October 03 From: New Jersey Member No.: 39 Real Name: John Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Larry Carr  |
Faery Award  *Graphic provided by Celtic Castle Designs A SECOND CHANCE The towering pine trees became ever more stately, thanks to a bounty of golden sunshine and gentle rain. Pruning the old brittle limbs would make them seem shapely, and the pinewoods could look healthy and trim once again. Smelling the beauty of the pines from my perch up high, I had a strange feeling that something possibly could go awry. Those thoughts of uncertainly were casually brushed aside as I felt secure for that one moment in the treetop I did reside. It was dreary and sullen on that fateful day in August of 1998. In the distant horizon was a northeasterly zephyr blanketing the sky with a tinge of color the shade of slate and for a brief moment, my tenure on earth became just a blur. The breezes that blew were no longer so gentle precipitating my fall to the ground as solely accidental. While lying entwined with the branches I had just clipped I screamed aloud for anyone whose hand I could grip. A host of angels hovered over and greeted me at a time when my body and soul were set to be free. Visions of my family and friends glowed like bright lights, as God's little attendants reached down to tug me off into flight. A solitary guardian savior heard my hysteric and desperate pleas; she opened up my eyes to the wonders I had yet to foresee. Vowing my heart would be generous till my last dying gasp, my divine messenger carefully released me from her grasp. In some strange way my aborted journey to the hereafter was for me an epiphany that encouraged me to envision one’s lifetime should be reveled in and filled with laughter, showing compassion to others would be my finest decision. My renewed spirit has given me many precious blessings. I’ve learned to love living with all its marvelous trimmings. I thank that sacred being for asking me to dance, forever thankful for being bestowed a second chance. ·······  ·······Give thanks for your new friends of today, but never forget the warm hugs of your yesterdays.
Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner             |
  
|
|
| Guest_Zeus²_* |
Aug 13 04, 12:22
Post
#2
|
|
|
John,
having heard first hand over dinner about your NDE, it was profound moment. It has reflected itself these past few years, especially in your writings. They are so full of life, and appreciation of things around you, especially loved ones. A source of inspiration to all. Larry |
|
|
|
|
Aug 13 04, 12:28
Post
#3
|
|
 Creative Chieftain  Posts: 847 Joined: 14-November 03 From: Ireland Member No.: 41 Real Name: Lucie Writer of: Poetry & Prose |
Hello John
 This is so uplifting and beautifully written, not only the central story but the details you include, the descriptions, the trees ever more stately, thanks to a bounty of golden sunshine and gentle rain. You describe the event so poetically..the fall itself, what you saw happening around you and finally the effects and consequent feelings and emotions. I really love these lines she opened up my eyes to the wonders I had yet to foresee. Vowing my heart would be generous till my last dying gasp, my divine messenger carefully released me from her grasp. This is one quick suggestion if you wanted to think about it one’s lifetime should be reveled in and filled with laughter, showing compassion to others would be my finest decision. Really enjoyed reading this..you have made this glimpse into another world so vivid and colourful :pharoah2 ······· ·······Lucie
"What could have made her peaceful with a mind That nobleness made simple as a fire, With beauty like a tightened bow, a kind That is not natural in an age like this, Being high and solitary and most stern? Why, what could she have done, being what she is? Was there another Troy for her to burn?" WB Yeats "No Second Troy" MM Award Winner   |
|
|
|
|
Aug 13 04, 12:28
Post
#4
|
|
|
Ornate Oracle Posts: 4,592 Joined: 31-October 03 From: New Jersey Member No.: 39 Real Name: John Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Larry Carr |
Larry,
Thank you....my experience has definitely changed my focus. I write about the little everyday things that people take for granted; I have learned to appreciate everyone and everything that much more JLY ······· ·······Give thanks for your new friends of today, but never forget the warm hugs of your yesterdays.
Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner |
|
|
|
| Guest_Tao_* |
Aug 13 04, 12:57
Post
#5
|
|
|
Hi John of July,
Is this the original version, before it was tweaked for Pandora's? It seems to read smoother. Nice to see a second chance for Second Chance. Gather ye rosebuds while ye may... David |
|
|
|
|
Aug 13 04, 13:15
Post
#6
|
|
|
Ornate Oracle Posts: 4,592 Joined: 31-October 03 From: New Jersey Member No.: 39 Real Name: John Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Larry Carr |
David, this is the real honest version. The one in Pandoras was changed to fit the criteria of the exercise and some lines do not ring true.
······· ·······Give thanks for your new friends of today, but never forget the warm hugs of your yesterdays.
Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner |
|
|
|
|
Aug 13 04, 13:17
Post
#7
|
|
|
Ornate Oracle Posts: 4,592 Joined: 31-October 03 From: New Jersey Member No.: 39 Real Name: John Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Larry Carr |
Lucie,
Thanks so much. Your comments are ones I am going to use right away. JLY ······· ·······Give thanks for your new friends of today, but never forget the warm hugs of your yesterdays.
Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner |
|
|
|
|
Sep 4 04, 18:19
Post
#8
|
|
 Mosaic Master  Posts: 18,893 Joined: 1-August 03 From: Massachusetts Member No.: 2 Real Name: Lori Kanter Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Imhotep |
Hello John!
WOW - what a detailed recouting of your own near death experience!  To hear from your own words the power of faith that you were blessed with and to be a messenger is truly admirable and spiritual. I wouldn't really want to change this piece, however I will offer ONE observation all the same. I noticed in your first three stanzas you follow an ABAB scheme, then for the remainder of your piece, you switch to an AABB pattern. I wondered if that was intentional? No matter, I like one as is!  Cheers! ~Cleo :lovie: :sun: ······· ·······"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here!  "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner  |
|
|
|
|
Sep 7 04, 06:16
Post
#9
|
|
|
Ornate Oracle Posts: 4,592 Joined: 31-October 03 From: New Jersey Member No.: 39 Real Name: John Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Larry Carr |
Cleo,
The rhyme scheme was unintentional; that is just the way it turned out. Thanks. JLY ······· ·······Give thanks for your new friends of today, but never forget the warm hugs of your yesterdays.
Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! MM Award Winner |
|
|
|
|
Jun 1 05, 05:15
Post
#10
|
|
|
Mosaic Master Posts: 18,893 Joined: 1-August 03 From: Massachusetts Member No.: 2 Real Name: Lori Kanter Writer of: Poetry & Prose Referred By:Imhotep |
I'd like to nominate this poem for the Faery Award...
Congrats John and thanks for tickling my muse! ~Cleo :pharoah2 ······· ·······"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to." ~ J.R.R Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Collaboration feeds innovation. In the spirit of workshopping, please revisit those threads you've critiqued to see if the author has incorporated your ideas, or requests further feedback from you. In addition, reciprocate with those who've responded to you in kind. "I believe it is the act of remembrance, long after our bones have turned to dust, to be the true essence of an afterlife." ~ Lorraine M. Kanter Nominate a poem for the InterBoard Poetry Competition by taking into careful consideration those poems you feel would best represent Mosaic Musings. For details, click into the IBPC nomination forum. Did that poem just captivate you? Nominate it for the Faery award today! If perfection of form allured your muse, propose the Crown Jewels award. For more information, click here! "Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." ~ Early detection can save your life.MM Award Winner |
|
|
|
| Guest_Toumai_* |
Jun 1 05, 05:41
Post
#11
|
|
|
John,
What a wonderful poem from such a profound experience. Lori, Thanks for remembering and rewarding it. Fran |
|
|
|
| Guest_Nina_* |
Jun 1 05, 06:21
Post
#12
|
|
|
Hi John
Congratulations on your Faery award which is very well deserved. You capture your experience so poignantly in this poem and the profound effect that it has had on how you look at life. Well done Nina |
|
|
|
1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
0 Members:
|
|
Lo-Fi Version | Time is now: 4th June 2026 - 18:23 |
Read our FLYERS - click below
|
| more Quotes |
| ||
|
|
|
|
