 Senryu, Japanese form: 5-7-5 or less |
 Oct 12 04, 04:41
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 Ornate Oracle  Posts: 19,936 Joined: 2-August 03 From: Southwest New Jersey, USA Member No.: 6 Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr. Writer of: Poetry Referred By:Lori  |
Senryu is a short form of poetry identical in construction to haiku: (three lines with 17 or fewer syllables with a cut after the first or second line forming two related snapshots of an experience of reality), but is generally about human foibles, while haiku references nature. Senryu need not include a kigo, or season word, like haiku (though it seems that much of modern English haiku tends toward senryu; that is, unlike traditional Japanese haiku, it may not necessarily adhere to the 5-7-5 syllable form which may be suitable in Japanese, but which tends to produce long or stilted language in English). A simple rule seems to be, Take a deep breath and read all three lines... cut and all.
I'll offer a couple of examples of my own, however inadequate. Perhaps someone with greater stature would like to add greater insight to this thread. How I love thee with breadth, length, depth and height… but who counts the days? © MLee Dickens'son 11 Oct 2004 feeling seventeen your heart pounds out senryu; you just can’t beat it © MLee Dickens'son 14 Feb 2004 By the way, I understand that they're often with a bit of humor, so I don't think I'm desecrating the form if I wink a bit. sharin' a bit o' de Light, Daniel 
·······  ·······Slow down; things will go faster!
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Posts in this topic
JustDaniel Senryu Oct 12 04, 04:41 
Larry she was a cut-up
working in a butcher shop;
cut ha... Apr 17 17, 14:08 JustDaniel the butt of her jokes
were the hams that she trimm... Apr 17 17, 15:56 Larry did ribs stand up to
hugs from the friendly grizzl... Apr 19 17, 22:45 JustDaniel she's found bare-able
in a flimsy nightgown;
c... Apr 20 17, 03:00 Larry her plan can see through
all the aps on your new p... Apr 22 17, 21:21 JustDaniel low down on your down load
you could die from smot... Apr 24 17, 01:19 Larry your bettor nose knows
that ante is all you lose
... Apr 26 17, 22:25 JustDaniel if I say 'Uncle'
let go or there'll be... Apr 27 17, 03:11 Larry your gnarly isle’s a kick
with its grass hut and b... Apr 28 17, 23:37 JustDaniel tourists pay a toll
on the bridge to your beaches;... Apr 30 17, 05:42 Larry free to leave all ways
but being on an island,
you... May 1 17, 21:09 JustDaniel you walk to your boat
across the face of the lake;... May 10 17, 18:32 Larry its mouth swallows ewe
and doesn’t like roadrunner... May 13 17, 19:02 JustDaniel why lea coyote?
it prefers the meadow sheep
'c... May 17 17, 07:30 Larry they’re lies cause a round
to be scored way below ... May 17 17, 22:34 JustDaniel Mulligans can't count
past sixty or seventy;
t... May 20 17, 21:19 Larry they thrust their low scores
under amateurs’ noses... May 22 17, 13:16 JustDaniel ode to priceless pear:
enjoy the juicy feeling
bit... May 22 17, 19:53 Larry biting an Anjou
is almost like chewing gum;
it’s a... May 23 17, 17:12 JustDaniel I saw juicy fruit
way up in the higher limbs;
low-... May 26 17, 17:59 Larry low-hanger’s too wet
to pick without squishing it... May 29 17, 17:36 JustDaniel pruned fruit tree 'til sticks
were all that wa... May 31 17, 04:44 Larry I amp your tater
in a microwaving bag;
saves time ... Jun 1 17, 09:18 JustDaniel save time and flavor:
dip your watch in chocolate
... Jun 1 17, 16:26 Larry ants stored in freezer
and then dipped in chocolat... Jun 2 17, 09:25 JustDaniel frozen ants covered
with chocolate and frozen?
han... Jun 3 17, 18:13 Larry hand swill is a mess
when you are slopping the hog... Jun 4 17, 22:02 JustDaniel Pall Malls in the swill
no more dangerous than dry... Jun 8 17, 05:17 Larry just herders who smoke
drive away some predators;
... Jun 8 17, 18:46 JustDaniel smells will get your goat
to take tomato soup bath... Jun 9 17, 05:00 Larry seems her milk was chunked
with a lot of butter fa... Jun 9 17, 10:55 JustDaniel chose way too much cheese:
mild, sharp, extra-shar... Jun 10 17, 07:17 Larry eat-um good Swiss
said the large cannibal chief;
I... Jun 10 17, 21:46 JustDaniel I'm having a ball
said the lone survivor;
it w... Jun 11 17, 04:23 Larry it was Tom’s cruise
so Jerry went for a ride;
on a... Jun 11 17, 22:07 JustDaniel when the comics tripped
they created a prat-fall;
... Jun 13 17, 04:36 Larry was a page-turner
for the public library;
it’s a h... Jun 15 17, 14:00 JustDaniel it's a handy job
being a sock-puppeteer...
a f... Jun 16 17, 04:51 Larry a foot in the door
might break it off its hinges;
... Jun 17 17, 08:21 JustDaniel a simple knock worst
habit at a deli;
just roll on... Jun 18 17, 06:16 Larry they just roll on in
to destroy old sand castles;
... Jun 19 17, 22:27 JustDaniel Waves lost their dreams
during World War II;
fathe... Jun 21 17, 10:31 Larry sailed farther away
than any European;
Vikings got... Jun 22 17, 13:41 JustDaniel Vikings got there first
as an expansion team;
Supe... Jun 22 17, 18:01 Larry soup or bowl of four
main food groups make up a me... Jun 23 17, 12:57 JustDaniel serial eaters
stay away from food groups;
like to ... Jun 23 17, 15:51 Larry likes to eat alone
but the ranger doesn’t hunt;
To... Jun 24 17, 17:12 JustDaniel Tonto brought him food;
neither White Feller nor S... Jun 25 17, 05:56 Larry would eat with silver
but they must be cleaned by ... Jun 26 17, 17:10 JustDaniel stain less in dishwater;
however, I no longer
fit ... Jun 27 17, 01:35 Larry fit the kitchen sink
into the large moving van;
yo... Jun 28 17, 09:15 JustDaniel you'll get everything
if she dies before you..... Jun 28 17, 11:01 Larry everything’s not well
when you’re kicking the buck... Jun 29 17, 08:30 JustDaniel after the rope breaks
don't worry about the fa... Jun 29 17, 13:41 Larry you want last summer
when it wasn’t so rainy;
wate... Jun 30 17, 21:09 JustDaniel water can down trees
especially if it's frozen... Jul 1 17, 05:12 Larry floods will it to do
anything to stay alive;
mangr... Jul 2 17, 10:14 JustDaniel man gives up rooting
with Phillies again routed;
n... Jul 2 17, 15:43 Larry no play of this year
was better than the one scene... Jul 3 17, 14:13 JustDaniel granddaughter's starring
in back-yard pool rid... Jul 3 17, 15:38 Larry blown-up unicorn
had tried to sound the alarm;
no ... Jul 4 17, 22:35 JustDaniel horn sounds piecefully
as the unicorn blows up;
no... Jul 6 17, 14:07 Larry know it will not float
when you eat a heavy meal;
... Jul 8 17, 22:22 JustDaniel no stink when it sinks;
skunk that you ran over
fa... Jul 9 17, 16:17 Larry falls in the river
might mean there’s danger ahead... Jul 11 17, 12:09 JustDaniel Roe, Roe, Roe, your boat
caused some to Wade throu... Jul 12 17, 02:19 Larry Manny aborted
the business with Moe and Jack;
boy ... Jul 12 17, 22:23 JustDaniel pep rally could not
revive Manny, Moe and Jack;
th... Jul 13 17, 01:05 Larry The Cars were retired
after a final world tour;
ju... Jul 13 17, 21:54 JustDaniel just what he kneaded:
more dough to inflate ego
so... Jul 14 17, 14:31 Larry he could loaf just so
it seemed like he was busy;
... Jul 16 17, 22:14 JustDaniel laissez-faire practice
means government lets go;
f... Jul 16 17, 23:31 Larry competition frees
prices which had been frozen;
co... Jul 17 17, 21:45 JustDaniel cold cash in the till
completely froze his assets;... Jul 18 17, 17:30 Larry can’t use his drawers
so he is a poor dresser;
had... Jul 21 17, 14:01 JustDaniel wore his shifty robe
because it was bareable;
it w... Jul 21 17, 14:53 Larry It was very hot
so he shaved off all his hair;
Fes... Jul 24 17, 17:59 JustDaniel festive bawling out-
side the funeral service;
mis... Jul 25 17, 12:56 Larry miss butt heaven bound
because it was well rounded... Jul 26 17, 17:55 JustDaniel Icarus winged it
waxing eloquent in flight;
feathe... Jul 29 17, 06:31 Larry fathers in the See
could not be superior;
nun was ... Jul 31 17, 08:17 JustDaniel Nun was a father;
he was the progenitor
of Joshua Jul 31 17, 13:23 Larry of Joshua’s kin
there were too many numbered;
only... Aug 2 17, 23:49 JustDaniel only one counted
playing the hide-and-seek game;
a... Aug 3 17, 12:55 Larry all went home to rest
from a hard day of playing;
... Aug 4 17, 08:54 JustDaniel now they just don't leave;
the branches reach ... Aug 4 17, 10:00 Larry from the dead, grey trunk
comes a lot of good fire... Aug 4 17, 16:15 JustDaniel less loaves leave less mess;
bakery opts to shut d... Aug 4 17, 22:38 Larry bees caused workers loafs
to fly through the baker... Aug 7 17, 07:43 JustDaniel sweet breads hit the spot
where angry bakers toss ... Aug 7 17, 16:39 Larry they demand more dough
and some yeast to make it r... Aug 9 17, 09:16 JustDaniel dip pretzels in beer
and they will come out soggy;... Aug 9 17, 10:06 Larry mustard is used best
as a flavor condiment;
when f... Aug 10 17, 14:22 JustDaniel if you're being frank
it's quite hard to b... Aug 10 17, 18:04 Larry when your roll won’t fit
because of the beer you d... Aug 11 17, 16:12 JustDaniel it's a hangover...
and a small belt won't ... Aug 12 17, 02:49 Larry tighter makes you just
able to take a deep breath;... Aug 14 17, 14:34 JustDaniel wheezing is teasing
your lungs to pneumonia;
scarr... Aug 14 17, 16:56 Larry you can kill scaring
gullible older people;
would ... Aug 16 17, 13:54 
JustDaniel would be fry-tender
but McDonald's fired me;
d... Aug 17 17, 12:56 2 User(s) are reading this topic (2 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
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