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> faux-ku, titled haiku/senryu w/word play [ Daniel's 'creation' ]
JustDaniel
post Jul 20 04, 14:11
Post #201


Ornate Oracle
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Group: Gold Member
Posts: 20,081
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori



Faux-ku is my own brain child, developed over a long time of playing with haiku and senryu. My Light, so to speak, dabbles in wit, and hopefully it has its place in haiku/senryu-type poetry. This form can have seriousness, but it will always be dressed in Light clothing.

(Just remember, these threads are for us to PRACTICE in! Let NO ONE suppose that I'm here to be a teacher. I AIN'T! But practicing in short forms, I believe, can improve one's ability in other forms, including Haiku. However, I AM the expert in faux-ku merely because it is my own baby! I'm willing to engage a tutor to bring it to maturity, if one is here and available to me.

The absolute criteria for faux-ku:


1) a fetching title
[ haiku and senryu never have a title ]

( title must be or have a play on words )


2) haiku/senryu form [ two snapshots ]

[ 5-7-5 syllables... or 3-2-3 beats -- OR LESS ! ]

one snapshot in two lines

another snapshot in one line

or vice versa



3) word-play in each snapshot (as well as in title)

Initial Samples:

high coop

foxy but chicken –
red hens turned into roosters
often high in trees


© Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002

out to launch

three nautical girls --
malled by low-price salers
during their noon break


© Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002

loud warning

red sails in sunset
clash crewedly once a blue moon;
mutin’ ears marooned


© Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002

stocking up down

white sales for son sets
precedent: Martha Stewart
fitted stock preferred


© Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002

dark fears

scared by Dad's visits?
at bottom had you been switched
to a light sleeper?


© Daniel J Ricketts 08 Dec 2002

sub lime pieces

you've run out?  blimey!
just cut up with ripe lemons
to post on our glass


© Daniel J Ricketts 10 Dec 2002

Now it's YOUR turn!

DeLightingly, Daniel 8)

P.S. One other concern... We reserve the responsibility to throw Sue out for several days at a time if she shows signs of addiction!


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