Limerick, Poetic Form Exercise Options

[Larry]

If you aw-fully impress the girls
‘cause your chest-hair has ringlets and curls
I’d suggest that you shave
it all off just to save
eyes from buttons your vest often hurls.

[Alan]

I's got buttons your vest often hurls
at those mighty strange creatures called gurlz
all peaked in a sweater
what don't know no better
who - goddamn it - put swine before purlz

Alan

[JustDaniel]

If you're feeding fine pearls to your swine
I must wonder on what you would dine:
do you drink silverade
that is served by a maid
who's decked out in gold chain? I decline.

[Merlin]

I decline a gold chain and e-rings,
e-male and e-lope, all those things,
and swine might get flu
so what’s there to do
if Pearl keeps undoing your strings?

[Larry]

If your strings are undone by Ms. Pearl,
rest assured, she’s a wonderful girl.
She’s a master masseuse
who’ll massage your caboose
and the rest until your toes uncurl.

[JustDaniel]

If your toes are uncurled, you can walk
much easier, and you can stalk
Ms Pearl where she works,
but there are no perks
if arrested, where you're found to gawk!

[Larry]

If arrested for gawking, you’ll find
that the term, “Out of sight, out of mind!”
doesn’t work as a crutch.
“You can look but don’t touch”
will not cover a voyeurs behind.

[Merlin]

A voyeur observing the action
saw addition and also, subtraction.
A pencil, eraser,
a skirt and a chaser
were parts of a total attraction.

[JustDaniel]

Attracted to girls at the park
he'd often go there on a lark
to ogle and stare
and dream to ensnare
a partner so they'd disembark.

[Merlin]

A partner of mine owned a barque
where he spent all his time, light or dark.
Dis em barque was his joy –
there was no cabin boy
so he barked at himself; what a quark!

[JustDaniel]

In the dark, Merlin barks at the moon,
which I hear he first did in Cancun,
where he went with a girl
who forbade him a whirl
on her bicycle that afternoon.

[Larry]

On her afternoon bicycle ride
she got hot and pulled off by the side
of the road for a dip
in the cove where a ship
full of septuagenarians cried

[Merlin]

On a septuagenarian cruise
there was bowling and barrels of booze
for spry, lively fellas
still able and zealous;
for others, large couches to snooze.

[JustDaniel]

While the ship full of old codgers drool
the young lady just waves as she cools
her bicycle buns
then wades out and suns
the rest, unaware she was cruel.


... and since I posted right after Merlin, evidently:


Lie about on your couch and grow fat
or roll off the veranda, go splat
on the concrete below
to let the blood flow
to the terra from which you'se begat.

[Merlin]

Begat poked at Terrance, who snored
unaware of the others aboard,
butt those buns in the sun
brought his snooze to undone,
and his anchor arose aweigh for’rd.

[JustDaniel]

When the archer arose near the ford
he crossed over the river; his sword
was still in his sheath
as he slipped beneath
the water... with arrows was gored.

[Larry]

With the water, agoras arose
and the shops all sold fish, I suppose
but in Venice, I’ll bet,
they catch fish with their net
and the shopkeepers all hold their nose

[Merlin]

Bill Shopkeeper’s sonnet on noses
was meant to be all about roses
but a typesetter’s goof
turned it into a spoof,
that R a true tale, one supposes!

[Larry]

One supposes that true are the tales
Merlin spins. Purposely, he misspells
words so linguistically
that it consternates me
but his last lines leave mental contrails.

[JustDaniel]

Pens are found at the end of con trails --
state or federal -- or county jails;
it is sad they repeat
but it's hard to defeat
the fact many felons oft fail.