|
|
|
Tetractys Train, Interactive Tetractys - Come play! |
|
|
|
Mar 18 13, 08:19
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,117
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
|
fit
your words
for the lines
both 5 and 6
into ten-syllable lines, and not nine-
and try to make each line a distinct piece
when attempting
tetractys;
keep it
up
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Mar 18 13, 14:48
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,505
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
|
Hey Daniel,
I started at the beginning of this post and read all the parameters and then the various posts and found very few who maintained strict adherence to the " Every line must be as self-contained as possible not relying on the next line to make its point" rule of thumb. I know, mine didn't either! The reason I tried to pen one was while reading your post beginning with "ears", I found that your line 3 was 4 syllables long: dif-fer-ent-ly; so I looked it up in numerous references to make sure I wasn't pronouncing it wrong myself. I know some people do pronounce it "dif-frent-ly". That is why I had the word parsed out in italics at the bottom of my Tetractys trial.
My line 6 is only 9 syls long but is an easy fix by adding "some" to "one" for someone, thus attaining the required 10 syls for that line. I'll try more of them but even in the Tetractys I referenced, there are a few lines there which are not self-contained and do rely on the previous or following line. None of this is a critique, just an observation.
Larry
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Mar 18 13, 15:16
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,117
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
|
up
above
where you cite
my rule of thumb
the key words are "as much . . . as possible"
and of course 'thumb rules' are merely guidelines
so that this form
won't merely
slice up
lines The idea of this 'rule of thumb' is not so much that each line is self-sufficient in the sense that it makes a point all by itself, but that is delineates a distinct PART of a point in combination with the other distinct pieces of the statement when the lines are joined together. I've merely challenged participants to exercise some kind of careful measuring of each line to make the form stand out as something worthwhile... and not just a cut-and-paste stringing together of words. Sometimes, of course, in such an exercise, our desire for a quick and/or humorous response may cause us to cast caution to the wind... but I hope that will be less and less the case as we seriously play with the form. ... and of course you're absolutely right about the 'correct' pronunciation of 'differently'... but the colloquial pronunciation in this neck of the woods would make four syllables sound a bit stiff-shirted. It's always that way in different corners of America and between various locations both in the US and in Brit-speaking areas. deLighting in your careful observations, Daniel
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Mar 18 13, 16:00
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,505
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
|
lines
adhere
gluing eyes
knowledge burrows
like small creatures who want to build a home
connect with all the other neighborhoods
building cities
from letters
sent to
minds
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Mar 19 13, 10:39
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,117
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
|
minds
enjoin
each other
to try to meld
and embark on a great space adventure
only to discover there's too much space
inside their brains
to connect
a real
truth
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Mar 19 13, 15:32
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,505
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
|
truth
kernels
recount facts
thoughts complicate
remembering highlights convolutions
forgetting distorts the various paths
never traveled
leading to
shadowed
lies
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Mar 19 13, 19:24
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,117
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
|
lye
bucket
soaks the chain
that Burger King
uses to broil all their lean hambergers;
if you stand them on their sides, however,
they won't lean well;
they'll fall flat
on sliced
buns
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Apr 2 13, 16:52
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,505
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
|
How about a double acrostic Tetractys? flour power
bread
and cake
kills masses
each day and night
decreasing blood flow, harming the liver
generating good cholesterol; so
omit any
or bodies
die from
same.
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Apr 5 13, 14:43
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,117
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
|
OK, Larry... You asked for it, so here's my response to your very clever Double Acrostic TetractysSACRIFIC(I)AL ENCLOSURES
some
adorn
c-cryptic
runes with awful
idiomatic sayings simply to
frustrate potential, curious readers;
if such are you
create your
acute
lines
© MLee Dickens'son 2013
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Apr 30 13, 09:49
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,505
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
|
Great Daniel! Now, back at you once more with another D-A-T! Limned Lines
lines
appall
builders who
yearn to know how
rooms, halls and doors, drawn by architects, form
interiors which fill all that home’s space. neatly, plans lined
to scale to
help, now
stun.
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Dec 8 13, 21:08
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 19,117
Joined: 2-August 03
From: Southwest New Jersey, USA
Member No.: 6
Real Name: Daniel J Ricketts, Sr.
Writer of: Poetry
Referred By:Lori
|
ELIMINATED LIMNBURGER
eel
limni
inked by him
may not brighten
intelligent discourse in your suburb;
no local fisherman ever asked you!
attend to your
tiny-burg
empire,
dear
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
|
Dec 10 13, 01:13
|
Group: Gold Member
Posts: 11,505
Joined: 15-June 07
From: Springfield, Louisiana
Member No.: 446
Real Name: Larry D. Jennings
Writer of: Poetry & Prose
Referred By:Just wondered in.
|
A WREATH
DECORATION... EMERALD EYE
Dare
each norm
called for here
on your front door
regardless of neighbor’s criteria
about how each house looks, or its appeal;
to flaunt your mood
in a theme
of joy,
nye!
······· ·······
|
|
|
|
1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
0 Members:
|
|
Read our FLYERS - click below
Reference links provided to aid in fine-tuning
your writings. ENJOY!
|
|
|
|