Limerick, Poetic Form Exercise Options

[Larry]

So all Italy thinks I’m a bitch;
I complain but my thoughts I’ll not switch.
How you drive! How you park!
Eat pizzas with a fork
and your hygiene habits make me itch.

[JustDaniel]

If your hygiene leaves you with an itch
perhaps you'd consider a switch
from that soap that you use.
It is dumb to refuse,
'cause you found it last week in the ditch.

[Larry]

Driving ‘round when I found in a ditch
some bar soap that’s used by filthy rich.
Well, the suds it released
made me feel I’d been greased
and extent of its scent won’t bewitch.

[JustDaniel]

You're bewitched by the scent of your tent?
Do you wonder where shower-smells went?
Then went right down the drain
with the sewage and rain
and the money you paid for the rent.

[Larry]

If you’ve paid all your money for rent
and maxed out what the credit cards lent
for your food, bills and gas
then you’re up to your ass
in deep do-do that Biden has sent.

[JustDaniel]

If one takes in the do-do Joe sends
it is likely there's smell that offends
all that enter one's house;
could embarrass his spouse
and he may need to make some amends.

[Larry]

If he’s making amends to his wife
for the crap that Joe’s put in their life
tell her this time he’ll vote
to retire the old goat.
He’ll clean house like he’s wielding a knife.

[JustDaniel]

If you like to clean house with your wife
while she's wielding a large butcher knife
I suggest you wear armor
so you will not harm 'er
defending yourself for your life

[Larry]

If your life is what you would defend,
let me introduce you to my friend.
He speaks little but loud
and can subdue a crowd.
Get your own friend because I don’t lend.

[JustDaniel]

If you your loud friend will not lend
are there others you might recommend
who could offer protection
perhaps with affection?
... or at least someone who could defend?

[Larry]

If you look for someone to defend
I would say “Get a mirror!” my friend
for if you’re not around
there’s no one to be found
who’ll protect and whom loved ones depend.

[JustDaniel]

If your love protects you with Depends
who can know where your future now wends?
Will you move to a home
where but mean nurses roam
and where no one your loaded pants tends?

[Larry]

When you’re loaded, your pants tend to sag
for your belt’s just a dirty old rag.
You’re in San Francisco
so when needing to go
pick a place that will not make you gag.

[JustDaniel]

If you gag after picking your place
move your fingers to some other space
They will smell better too
Don't be lickin' that dew
'til you've cleaned 'em, or live in disgrace

[Larry]

No disgrace for my fingers are clean
like the rest of this aging Marine
and the house, yard and car
would be graded five star.
I prefer that it all stay pristine.

[JustDaniel]

You require it to all be pristine?
Then be sure your detergent is green.
Keep our Earth clean and bright
but pretend you're not white
so that you won't be caught in between.

[Larry]

If you find yourself caught in-between
two woke crowds who are venting their spleen,
take out your concealed carry…
I don’t think they’ll tarry
but run as they vacate the scene.

[JustDaniel]

If they vacate Scene Three of your play
is there really a reason to stay
just to spout your last words?
Go outside with the birds
and fly off with them to Bombay.

[Larry]

If you fly with the birds to Bombay;
do you take some rest stops or just stay
flying up in the air
when you want to take care
of your needs; hope no one’s in the way?

[JustDaniel]

You don't care if someone's in the way
when you're going let-fly with your spray
or you're dropping a poo
smack inside that canoe
since your aiming seems top-notch today!