Bridling the Wind -w/edits, sonnet Options

[Michelle]

Bridling the Wind +++w/edits

Her kisses moored her children home in bed
away from whirlpool depths and wizard's ire,
while tucks of linen cooled capricious fires
and feather down allayed each flaxen head.
She tethered dreams to earth with close-knit threads*
from apron strings, for growing up requires
they clamber concrete steps to venture higher;
reality demands its daily bread.

She never gripped a silver spoon until
her children had arrived; she warmed each one
with kindled dreams and forged their hollow bends*
as flat as trowels-- tools that might fulfill
adventures which imagination's spun.*
Her children fashioned stairways to ascend.



* = edited lines




+++original

Bridling the Wind

Her kisses moored her children home in bed
away from whirlpool depths and wizard's ire,
while tucks of linen cooled capricious fires
and feather down allayed each flaxen head.
She tethered dreams to earth with threads
from apron strings, for growing up requires
they clamber concrete steps to venture higher;
reality demands its daily bread.

She never gripped a silver spoon until
her children had arrived; she warmed each one
in kilns of dreams and forged their hollow bend
as flat as trowels-- tools that might fulfill
the ventures which imagination spun.
Her children fashioned stairways to ascend.

[heartsong7]

Ah Michelle... This creates a wonderfully haunting, wistful mood. I so admire your expertise with metaphor and imagery.
I'm really short of time but just had to say how this touched me.
Nit-wise, L5 is short.
I'll come back later for a more thorough review, but right now that's the only line that caused me pause.

While I'm here, I'd like to thank you for your kind words on my "The Good Daughter" sonnet. I let it get way down on the page before I realized I had not replied to your comments.
Your insight is always a joy to receive.
Thank you for that and for sharing this little work of art.

Best Regards,
Sue