The Three Bears, 600 words Options

[Guest_Toumai_*]

Revision 30th March

The Three Bears’ Outreach

Once upon a time two furry, gentle bears lived in harmony, cheerfully walking through the woods. Eventually, Baby Bear was born and Mama and Papa Bear settled in a cottage in the heart of their forest.

Baby Bear was a joy – climbing and cuddling, rolling and running. Mama and Papa Bear were very content until one day …

“Just look at that peeling plaster,” Papa said. “We will have to fix that before Winter.”

So Mama fetched a ladder, Papa mixed plaster and they repaired all the holes. “That should last a while,” said Papa, with satisfaction, as he descended the ladder.

Mama clapped her paws. “It looks like new. Now, what colour shall we paint it?”

☺ ☺ ☺

Baby Bear grew into a strong, boisterous yet loving youngster. He learned the ways of woodland bears and one day he was invited to a Young Bears’ Conference far away in the Big Mountains. He came back full of ideas.

“Mama, we should treat bees better – stop ripping them off.”

“What a sweet idea, Son.”

“Papa, let’s free those caged salmon in the river.”

“Kind idea, Son; wild ones are so rare these days.”

“Mama, Papa … why do we have bare plaster on our walls?”

“Because we’re Bears, son,” growled his parents. Indeed, for many years they had discussed possible colours for the cottage without discerning any conclusion. Mama wanted cream, while Papa, who had a sweet tooth, favoured honey.

“How about some Outreach?” suggested Baby Bear. “I have heard that sometimes small girls get lost in the forest, taking baskets of flowers to their grandmothers, and might need a safe house to stay in until a brave woodsman rescues them.”

“Well …” Baby Bear’s parents scratched their furry pates. “So long as we aren’t mistaken for The Big Bad Wolf: small girls are his territory, you know.”

“Live adventurously,” Baby Bear reminded them. “Hey, how about salmon pink for the cottage?”

“Far too frivolous!” His parents shook their heads and hastily changed the subject back to Outreach. They decided that as lost little girls were rare – the Big Bad Wolf being rather more pro-active in his interpretation of Outreach – they would not need a purpose-built centre but could merely alter accessibility to existing structures.

“We’ll replace our stairs with a ladder and trapdoor,” suggested Mama. So the stairs were demolished and a precipitous, wolf-baffling ladder installed.

“How will they find us?” asked Baby Bear.

“Gosh, I hadn’t thought of that.” Papa frowned. “We should leave signs along forest trails.”

“Humans can’t read bear language,” Baby pointed out. “They don’t smell the message: they are too busy fussing at what they’ve trodden in.”

“Ah, of course.” Mama nodded. “And human writing won’t work: little girls might be too young to read or too poor to attend school.”

“I have it!” Papa cried. “We could spread the idea around town. How about a story that the children can pass amongst themselves – word of mouth?”

“Nah, too slow,” said Baby. “We’re in the information age – I’ll put an ad on our web-site.”

“We’ll have food available,” Mama was enthusiastic.

“Yes,” Papa agreed, “something anyone can eat…vegetarian…cholesterol-free….”

“Oh dear….” Mama said.

“I’ve got it!” Baby waved his copy of The Bare Chef at them: “Porridge!”

“Yes!” cried Mama and Papa, embracing.

“And,” Baby added, “we can leave the plaster bare.”




Original: The Three Bears’


Once upon a time two furry, gentle Bears lived in harmony, cheerfully walking through the woods. Eventually, Baby Bear was born and Mama and Papa Bear decided to settle in a cottage in the heart of their forest.

Baby Bear was a joy, climbing and cuddling, rolling and running. Mama and Papa Bear were very content until one day …

“Just look at that peeling plaster,” Papa said, gazing up at the wall. “We will have to fix that before the winter arrives.”

So Mama fetched the ladder, Papa mixed the plaster and they repaired the holes. “That should last a while,” said Papa with satisfaction as he descended the ladder after the last cracks were filled.

Mama clapped her paws. “It looks like new. Now, what colour shall we paint it?”

☺ ☺ ☺

Baby Bear grew into a strong, boisterous yet loving youngster. He learned the ways of bears in the woods and one day he was invited to a Young Bear Conference far away in the Big Mountains. He came back full of Big Ideas.

“Mama, we should treat the bees better; stop ripping them off.”

“I’d never thought about that, Son; what a sweet idea.”

“Papa, Let’s free those caged salmon in the River.”

“Kind idea, Son; the wild ones are getting rare these days.”

“Mama, Papa … why do we have bare plaster on our walls?”

“Because we’re Bears, son,” growled his parents. Indeed, for many years they had discussed the colour-to-be of the cottage but not reached any conclusion. Mama wanted cream, while Papa, who had a sweet tooth, favoured honey.

“How about some outreach?” suggested Baby Bear. “I have heard that sometimes small girls get lost in the forest – taking baskets of flowers to sick grandmothers – and might need a safe house to rest in until the brave Woodsman rescues them.”

“Well …” Baby Bear’s parents scratched their furry pates, “So long as we don’t get mistaken for the Big Bad Wolf; small girls are his territory, you know.”

“Live adventurously,” Baby Bear reminded them. “Hey, how about salmon pink for the cottage colour?”

His parents shook their heads and hastily changed the subject back to outreach. They decided that as lost little girls were rare – the Big Bad Wolf being rather more proactive in his own interpretation of outreach – they would not need a purpose-built centre but could merely improve accessibility to existing structures.

“We’ll replace the stairs with a ladder and trapdoor,” suggested Mama, “So she can escape the Wolf.” So the stairs were demolished and a precipitous ladder installed.

“How will they find us?” asked Baby Bear.

“Gosh, I hadn’t thought of that.” Mama frowned. “We should leave some signs along the forest trails.”

“Humans can’t read bear language,” Baby reminded her, “They don’t smell the message – they are too busy fussing at what they’ve trodden in.”

“Ah, of course,” Mama nodded, “And human writing won’t work; little girls might be too small to read or too poor to go to school.”

“I’ve got it!” Papa cried. “We could spread the idea around town. How about a story that the children can pass amongst themselves – word of mouth?”

“Nah; too slow,” said Baby, “We’re in the information age; I’ll put an ad on our web-site.”

“We’ll leave food available.” Mama was enthusiastic now.

“Yes,” Papa agreed, “Something anyone can eat … vegetarian …choelesterol free ….”

“Oh dear….” Mama sighed.

“I’ve got it!” Baby waved his copy of The Bare Chef at them: “Porridge!”

“Yes!” cried Mama and Papa, embracing.

“And,” Baby added, “we can paint the cottage oatmeal, of course.”


© Toumai, 2006

Note:
This is for a 600-word story comp in The Friend, a Quaker journal; hence some of the "in" jokes may be a little obscure (a classic Quaker scenario being that Friends can argue forever on what shade to paint the Meeting House).

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Fran what a different take on a fractured fairy tale...I love the humor in it and am sure that the Qaukers will enjoy it as well. This was a very good read.
Steve