 Beneath My Hand |
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Archives > Archives > ARCHIVES -> Poetry for Crit Prior to 2011
| Guest_Cathy_* |
 Oct 30 05, 18:42
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#1
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I remember Black Suede - scented skin; muscles - firm, rippling. I feel the change in facial structure as you smile ... beneath my hand. Encircled by your warmth, wherein our love resides; I know your thoughts and you sense mine ... Placed upon your heart, I feel passion roiling; as lips draw near feelings grow stronger ... beneath my hand. Cathy Bollhoefer copyright Oct2005 |
  
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| Guest_Nina_* |
Oct 31 05, 00:52
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#2
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Hi Cathy
A very passionate, sensual poem from you this time. Just a few thoughts: Beneath My Hand I remember Black Suede - scented skin; muscles - firm, rippling. ...mmmm I feel the change in facial structure as you smile ... beneath my hand. Encircled by your warmth, wherein our love resides; ...I wonder if you really need this line. Does love only live in his warmth? I know your thoughts and you sense mine ... ...aww, lovely Placed upon your heart, I feel passion roiling; ....is roiling the right word? If feels somewhat negative more how you'd describe a storm rather than passion. I can't think of an alternative that doesn't have a double meaning though. as lips draw near feelings grow stronger ... beneath my hand. ooer, my imagination is working overtime, LOL I enjoyed this, thanks Nina |
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Posts in this topic
Cathy Beneath My Hand Oct 30 05, 18:42 
Cathy Hi Nina,
A very passionate, sensual poem from you... Oct 31 05, 08:27 Nina Hi Cathy
>C>I was thinking of my fiancee - who li... Oct 31 05, 14:04 Peterpan Hello Cathy~
This is a different angle for a love... Oct 31 05, 15:56 Cathy Hi Nina,
I didn't know you were engaged, cong... Oct 31 05, 17:48 Cathy Hi PP,
This is a different angle for a love poem.... Oct 31 05, 17:52 Nina Hi Cathy
>C>Nina's imagination ran further wh... Nov 1 05, 01:17 Cathy Hi Nina,
>C>Nina's imagination ran further wh... Nov 1 05, 07:05 Peterpan A sad but, beautiful story, Cathy. You sound like ... Nov 1 05, 12:43 Cathy Hi Bev,
Thank you, I appreciate that! H... Nov 1 05, 19:20 Cleo_Serapis Hi Cathy.
This is a lovely piece and I particular... Nov 13 05, 10:15 Cathy Thank you Lori! :ballet: :rose: Nov 13 05, 11:50 ohsteve Very good descriptions and imagery here, good writ... Nov 22 05, 19:22 
Cathy Hi Steve,
First off, let me welcome you to MM... Nov 23 05, 11:02 1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
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