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> Garden of Eden, revised
Guest_Nina_*
post Jul 24 05, 01:07
Post #1





Guest






Thanks to James for the comment he made which gave me the inspiration for this poem

Garden of Eden (revised with thanks to Cathy, Don and James)

Alluring winding lane
leads enticingly
to elegant splendour;
magnificent garden
in secluded enclave.

Lush trimmed lawns
border neat flowerbeds:
rich profusion
of flourishing flowers.

Rainbow colours
nestle proudly among  
rich green foliage.

Heady perfume
attracts brightly
coloured butterflies
flitting between blooms.

Sparkling-clear icy water
tumbles from majestic waterfall
into gently flowing stream.

Tranquillity surrounds.

I tread eagerly along
intricately patterned path,
venturing deeper
into magical garden:
unaware,
unsuspecting.

My mirror shatters:
paradise fractures into
deadly shards.

Illusion dissolves.

Withered, gnarled trees ,
become distorted headless bodies:
they tower menacingly above
barren, desolate landscape.

Spiders’ webs span
rusting jagged spikes;
lean brown rats
rummage rotting rubbish
on stony cracked earth

Dense dank fog lingers
over stagnant slimy pond:
death and decay
from every crevice.

Lured by childish trust
through false veneer of
beauty and enchantment:,
I’m trapped in
unrelenting, waking
nightmare…

Black reality






------------------------
Garden of Eden (original)

Alluring winding lane
leads me enticingly
to elegant splendour
of magnificent garden
in secluded enclave.

Lush trimmed lawns
border neat flowerbeds,
planted with rich profusion
of flourishing flowers.

Pinks, reds,
yellows, mauves
nestle proudly among  
rich green foliage.

Heady perfume
fills the air,
attracting brightly
coloured butterflies
who flit from bloom to bloom.

Sparkling icy clear water
tumbles from majestic waterfall
into gently flowing stream below.

Tranquillity surrounds me.

I tread eagerly along
intricately patterned path,
venturing deeper
into magical garden:
unaware,
unsuspecting

The mirror shatters:
paradise fragments into
deadly sharp,
glassy shards.

Illusion dissolves.

Withered, gnarled trees,
like distorted headless bodies,
tower menacingly above
barren, desolate landscape

Spiders weave webs
between rusting jagged spikes,
while lean brown rats rummage
amid rotting rubbish
on stony cracked earth.

Dense dank fog lingers
over stagnant slimy pond:
death and decay
emanate from every crevice.

Lured by childish trust
into false veneer of
beauty and enchantment:,
I’m trapped
in unrelenting,
waking nightmare.

Black reality


Nina




 
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Guest_Nina_*
post Jul 26 05, 07:19
Post #2





Guest






Hi J

Grow lawn wallpaper and have a pully-system from the ceiling, slowly allowing the indoor mover down then hoisting it back up and along to re-start - or have fun with the scissors. Beats watching paint dry any day!
ROFL

The only problem with that idea, is the thought of having to remove all the lovely painted over woodchip paper we have throughout the flat.

Nina
 
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Posts in this topic
- Nina   Garden of Eden   Jul 24 05, 01:07
- - Cathy   Hi Nina, This was a shocking twist!  I was lu...   Jul 24 05, 07:37
- - Nina   Hi Cathy This was a shocking twist!  I w...   Jul 24 05, 07:57
- - Don   Hi Nina, Your plethora of awards intimidates my h...   Jul 24 05, 08:48
- - Nina   Hi Don Many thanks for your extensive and careful...   Jul 24 05, 09:32
- - Don   Hi Nina Many thanks for your extensive and carefu...   Jul 24 05, 10:25
- - Nina   Hi Don As you can tell colorful badges are colorf...   Jul 24 05, 10:44
- - Don   Hi Nina, It would be difficult in this particular...   Jul 24 05, 11:09
- - Nina   Hi Don Difficult only to the degree of images wit...   Jul 24 05, 16:20
- - Jox   Hi Nina, some suggestions... {-}[+](Comments) Th...   Jul 24 05, 17:09
- - Nina   Hi J Thanks for the credit! thanks for the id...   Jul 25 05, 00:17
- - Nina   I've made some revisions which I hope improve ...   Jul 25 05, 14:47
- - Cleo_Serapis   WOW Nina!  Shock A very stimulating tile! J...   Jul 26 05, 05:24
- - Nina   Hi Lori Thanks for popping in here to read. ...   Jul 26 05, 06:51
- - Jox   Hi Nina, Well done - good revision. >N>I'm n...   Jul 26 05, 06:54
- - Nina   Hi J Well done - good revision. thanks and thanks...   Jul 26 05, 07:02
- - Jox   Hi Nina - Grow lawn wallpaper and have a pully-sy...   Jul 26 05, 07:16
- - Cleo_Serapis   QUOTE(Nina @ July 26 2005, 07:51)Hi Lori Tha...   Jul 26 05, 07:23
- - Nina   Hi Lori I've never heard of boxwoods, so had ...   Jul 30 05, 01:42
- - Toumai   Hi, Nina The imagery is vivid and striking; the s...   Jul 30 05, 03:00
- - Jox   Hi Nina, et al. Box is a tree / shrub grown much ...   Jul 30 05, 03:09
- - Nina   Hi Fran The imagery is vivid and striking; the sc...   Jul 30 05, 04:38
- - Nina   Hi James Box is a tree / shrub grown much in the ...   Jul 30 05, 04:41

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