Help - Search - Members - Calendar
Full Version: Catharsis
Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Archives > Archives > ARCHIVES -> Poetry for Crit Prior to 2011
Cathy
Catharsis

Lazuline sullied by Nemesis:
squalling winds
sling sand of scorpion's bite;
presage wanton devastation.

Carphophis;
coupled with atmospheric shock,
reveal astraphobia...
the darkness where evil lurks.

Chin up;
face the inevitable...

Dawn awakens
aurified hope.
Kissed by sunlight,
playful waters caress new shore;

her profile has changed ...
yet she's still a beach.

Cathy Bollhoefer
copyright Dec2005

Carphophis - thunder snake
Astraphobia - morbid fear of thunder & lightning
Nemesis - goddess of divine retribution & vengeance
Nina
Hi Cathy

I like the move from negative to positive in this poem.

Lazuline sullied by Nemesis:
squalling winds
sling sand of scorpion's bite; ..good alliteration however, and it's probably just me being dense, I'm having trouble making sense of these two lines.  Should it be sling sand on scorpion's bite.
presage wanton devastation.    ..perhaps presaging?

Carphophis;
coupled with atmospheric shock,
reveal astraphobia...
the darkness where evil lurks.  ...brrr

Chin up;
face the inevitable...    grinning.gif

Dawn awakens
aurified hope.
Kissed by sunlight,
playful waters caress new shore;

this is my favourite verse.

her profile has changed ...
yet she's still a beach.

outside she's changed but inside she's still the same


Nina




Cathy
Hi Nina,

I like the move from negative to positive in this poem.

Thank you ... so do I  lol

Lazuline sullied by Nemesis:
squalling winds
sling sand of scorpion's bite; ..good alliteration however, and it's probably just me being dense, I'm having trouble making sense of these two lines.  Should it be sling sand on scorpion's bite.

It should probably read 'like' scorpion's bite.  I was trying to show that the blowing sand would sting like a scorpion.

presage wanton devastation.    ..perhaps presaging? Maybe ... ???

Carphophis;
coupled with atmospheric shock,
reveal astraphobia...
the darkness where evil lurks.  ...brrr

Chin up;
face the inevitable...    

Dawn awakens
aurified hope.
Kissed by sunlight,
playful waters caress new shore;

this is my favourite verse.

Mine too!   sun.gif

her profile has changed ...
yet she's still a beach.

outside she's changed but inside she's still the same

She may have changed some on the inside too but she is still 'herself'.  A person with feelings, hopes and dreams.  Although they may have changed as well.  She has learned that some things aren't as important as she once thought and her priorities have changed.

Thanks for reading and I'm glad to see that the intent came through.  I was afraid that it might not be clear enough.

Cathy
rose.gif  :dove:  :rose:
This is a "lo-fi" version of our main content. To view the full version with more information, formatting and images, please click here.
Invision Power Board © 2001-2019 Invision Power Services, Inc.