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Cathy
A Lira is a five-line Spanish form with 7, 11, 7, 7, 11 syllables and a  rhyme scheme of a b a b b, thus:  

7  a
11  b
7  a
7  b
11  b

~~~~~~~~~~~

Wolf Prints

Dark eyes reveal great valiance,
in padded silence you tread the path of pride;
inner strength perceived in stance.
Insight you freely confide
and forever will you be my spirit guide.

Cathy Bollhoefer
copyright Dec2005
Nina
Hi Cathy


Well done for having a go at this form. It works very well with the image of the wolf as your spirit guide.

Dark eyes reveal great valiance,
in padded silence you tread the path of pride;
inner strength perceived in stance.
Insight you freely confide
and forever will you be my spirit guide.


L5 you could also have it as

and forever you will be my spirit guide.

thanks for the read

Nina
Nefertiti
Hi Cathy!

Amazing!  I really like this format!  Somewhat like a grown-up haiku.  The only bittiest crit I have is that I never like using the word "and" if I don't have to.  This is a personal preference.  It's my belief that there are other words that can be used in place of "and" that are more powerful, that's all.  So, my crit would be to change "and" in the last line to maybe something like "so" or "now" or "then" or whatever word makes the most sense to you to convey your point.  Hope THAT makes sense!:laugh:

Hugs,
B.
Toumai
Hi Cathy,

I like Nef's description - a haiku plus, lol. Very reverent homage to the wolf and ancestry - lovely. Thanks for introducing me to this form here.

Fran
Cathy
Hi Nina,

Well done for having a go at this form. It works very well with the image of the wolf as your spirit guide. Thank you!

Dark eyes reveal great valiance,
in padded silence you tread the path of pride;
inner strength perceived in stance.
Insight you freely confide
and forever will you be my spirit guide.

L5 you could also have it as

and forever you will be my spirit guide. Yes, that would work too. *smiles*

thanks for the read

Your welcome!
Cathy
Hi Nefertiti!

Amazing!  I really like this format!  Somewhat like a grown-up haiku.  The only bittiest crit I have is that I never like using the word "and" if I don't have to.  This is a personal preference.  It's my belief that there are other words that can be used in place of "and" that are more powerful, that's all.  So, my crit would be to change "and" in the last line to maybe something like "so" or "now" or "then" or whatever word makes the most sense to you to convey your point.  Hope THAT makes sense!

I like that ... a grown-up haiku!  lol

I don't like using 'and' either so I will see what I can do.  Thanks!

Cathy
Cathy
Hi Fran,

I like Nef's description - a haiku plus, lol. Very reverent homage to the wolf and ancestry - lovely. Thank you!  Thanks for introducing me to this form here. Your welcome!  It was just introduced to me yesterday.  lol

Thanks Fran,
Cathy
wolf.gif
Merlin
Hi Cathy,
I had to dig back into my books to locate the writeup, never having done a lira, and never having owned any either!

My source gives it as a Spanish form, coming from Italy.  Garcilaso de la Vega is credited with the introduction, and he used the word lira in the first line of his - thus giving the name to the form.

It's interesting.  On occasion I'll play with a Spanish form for variety sake.  I'll have to try one of these.
Congrats on giving it a whirl!

Merlin
Cathy
Thanks Merlin!

I'd never heard of the form until about a week ago when it
was introduced at PV as form of the month.  I hope you
decide to try one!

Cathy Snowflake.gif
circumsolar
never heard or read this form before, so cool! loved your title and enjoyed the read, especially the interesting use of valiance (an extension from valiant that i've not come across before either! ) to work with stance for your rhyme-scheme. not so convinced about your comma and semi-colon though, it feels to me they could be swapped about,  lending the first line a bit more weight and making l's 2 and 3 more of a flowing statement.

nice one, Cathy




Cleo_Serapis
Hi Cathy.

I'll be back later for a critique on this neat piece. In the meantime, would you mind posting this form and your poem in Karnak for us?

thanks.gif

Cleo hsdance.gif
Cathy
Hi circumsolar,

never heard or read this form before, so cool! loved your title and enjoyed the read, especially the interesting use of valiance (an extension from valiant that i've not come across before either! ) to work with stance for your rhyme-scheme. I'd never heard of it either till I ran across it at Rhyme Zone. not so convinced about your comma and semi-colon though, it feels to me they could be swapped about,  lending the first line a bit more weight and making l's 2 and 3 more of a flowing statement. I can change that.  lol  I'm not real good with punctuation.

nice one, Cathy

Thank you!

Cathy
Cathy
Hi Lori,

I'll be back later for a critique on this neat piece. In the meantime, would you mind posting this form and your poem in Karnak for us?

I can do that ... *smiles*

Cathy
Snowflake.gif
AMETHYST
Hi Cathy,

A great job with your very first Lira. I've given this a try or two, but haven't yet completed one yet. Your poem inspires me to pick up that pen again and give it a twirl.

Now for your Lira!  :wave:

QUOTE
Wolf Prints

Great Title.

Dark eyes reveal great valiance,
in padded silence you tread the path of pride;
inner strength perceived in stance.
Insight you freely confide
and forever will you be my spirit guide.

L3, I especially liked the use of 'in stance' giving a dual meaning-simultaneously. in stance, brings an immediate image of strength and a face off... then, my minds eye captures the word 'instance' as in 'in a flick of an eye' or in a split second. Nicely done.
L4, I wasn't too sure that perhas, 'Insight' was that word that fit the follow through of the motion in the poem. The line, with the word insight, isn't too clear for me. Although, it just might be me and the conrfused state inwhich my mind has been in lately.

Other than that little nit, I enjoyed this and have been inspired by your skills.  
Cleo_Serapis
Hi Cathy. wave.gif

Congrats on your first Lira and a big thanks for posting the form here too for us to learn and enjoy!  :cheer:

I love these short forms because they force us to manipulate the words moreso IMO.

I enjoyed the spirit of your poem and could feel myself walking the path of the wolf.  :wolf:

I have the same question point on the word insight and take it to mean 'wisdom'. A wisdom freely given.

Well done Cathy! claps.gif

~Cleo  :princess:
Cathy
Hi Amethyst,

A great job with your very first Lira. I've given this a try or two, but haven't yet completed one yet. Your poem inspires me to pick up that pen again and give it a twirl.

I hope you do!  I'll keep my eyes open for it.  *smiles*

Now for your Lira!  

Quote  

Wolf Prints

Great Title.

Thank you!

Dark eyes reveal great valiance,
in padded silence you tread the path of pride;
inner strength perceived in stance.
Insight you freely confide
and forever will you be my spirit guide.

L3, I especially liked the use of 'in stance' giving a dual meaning-simultaneously. in stance, brings an immediate image of strength and a face off... then, my minds eye captures the word 'instance' as in 'in a flick of an eye' or in a split second. Nicely done.

I hadn't even thought of that when I was writing it!  lol  Thanks!

L4, I wasn't too sure that perhas, 'Insight' was that word that fit the follow through of the motion in the poem. The line, with the word insight, isn't too clear for me. Although, it just might be me and the conrfused state inwhich my mind has been in lately.

I'll have to take a look at that.  He is passing on his knowledge and insight on life.

Other than that little nit, I enjoyed this and have been inspired by your skills.  

Jeeesshh! Thank you!  I really appreciate it!

Cathy
wolf.gif
Cathy
Hi Lori,

Congrats on your first Lira and a big thanks for posting the form here too for us to learn and enjoy!  

Thank you and your welcome of course!

I love these short forms because they force us to manipulate the words moreso IMO.

I agree.  I'm surprised at how well they turn out sometimes.

I enjoyed the spirit of your poem and could feel myself walking the path of the wolf.  

I have the same question point on the word insight and take it to mean 'wisdom'. A wisdom freely given.

Maybe I should just use the word 'wisdom'.  *smiles*

Well done Cathy!

Thank you and I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Cathy
wolf.gif
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