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Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews > Poetry Forums > Poetry Education -> Karnak Crossing
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If her tantrum begins your vacation
I must wonder, does she cause elation
because she's all lit up
and that you'll be close-up
when she's down and can have culmination?
Culminate when she’s down and you’ll have
a big problem. Best check the old valve
to make sure your control
finds you in the right hole
even if you must break out some salve.
If you break out the salve for your hurts
it's not likely that you will insert
your brain back in there
where you're likely to share
all the ills of the street and perverts.
If perverts on the street are your ills
and drug pushers are selling their pills
then lawyers in the courts
should examine their torts
and uphold the laws, not just make deals.
If you want to make deals with the law
you must know some big folks with big claws
and you need lots of dough
'cause you will have to show
you can keep placing bucks in they paws.
If you pause placing bucks they can keep
some may think of you as being cheap
but the honest ones will
leave the cash in the till
for they know, “what you sow, you will reap”!
If you sew what you rip they will know
from the stitches which are to and fro
like poor Frankenstein’s face
they’re all over the place
and expose junk you don’t want to show.
If you want to expose all your junk
you should do what you do in your bunk
not where everyone sees
how the fat old man pees...
or at least they could have ere it shrunk!
If it shrunk they could have cared the least
but the voyeur in them never ceased
looking for the odd slip
to upload a film clip
so their sick libidos were increased.
If libidos increased when you’re sick
then I wouldn’t know what makes you tick
as you holler and curse
every good looking nurse
who may comment, “That guy is a prick”!
You may comment, that guy who is pricked
tried to prune a rose bush but it nicked
both his finger and thumb
and they now have become
so infected they’ll have to be wicked.
To have infected wickets, you’ll be
on the sidelines although you may plea
to get out on the pitch
when they’re making a switch
but that doesn’t sound cricket to me.
If you haven't seen Ricketts, you see
that I'm busy with moving, but gee,
I'll be back when I can
come and sit on my can
and type rhymes; what will be then will be!
“What will be rhymes whenever I type?”
is a question folks ask as they gripe
about meter and rhythm,
that’s all that I’ll give ‘em
when they sit on the sidelines and snipe.
I won't sit on the sidelines and snipe,
and I sure ain't here smokin' no pipe,
but I'll rock when I rhyme
and roll back to the time
of the beat when I've moments to type.
When I type, every moment’s the best
whether serious or just in jest
for which I thank my muse
to bring tears or amuse
but I hope what I write stands the test.
I've lost hope that my stuff passes tests
and I don't care if others' work bests
what I write for myself;
it won't sit on their shelf
with the classics... but I'll share my jests!
To share jests is a classic approach
getting people to post. No reproach
will you find in our crits.
We just chew little bits
‘till your poem looks like a diamond broach.
If my poems become diamond broaches
it will be 'cause I'll have many coaches
to throw out my junk
to which lately I've sunk;
hopefully some new time now approaches.
Hopefully, there approaches new times
when the mosaic’s filled with good rhymes
and a lot of free verse
with critiques that aren’t terse
which bring smiles, not unlike a good mime.
I got smiles for my work in my den
where I set up a chair for my hen
to come watch some TV
and have time just with me...
when I move... maybe days down to ten!

(But even then we'll have months of work to do at BOTH places till we're done!)
“Ten more days ‘till you move with your hen?”
I’d ask, tongue-in-cheek, hiding a grin,
and inquire if a rooster
phoned Simon and Schuster
about publishing fowl books he’d pen.
We have booked all our foul in their pen
at night 'cause o' four-leggeds' yen
fer chicken an' such
which we don't like much...
but in ten days I'll be in my den.
Ten more days and your den will be filled
with the comforts of home; you’ll be thrilled
to relax and just slouch
on your big comfy couch.
Don’t get lost in the cost; you’ll be billed.
I'll be billed, and I still won't relax
'cause with 23 cents more in tax
to our gallons of gas
I can't sit on my ass;
still must drive to the old, forth and back

Last week NJ's gas tax went up 23 cents per gallon! ... and we will still have a couple of walls and two ceilings to build at the old house for our tenants to move in where we have been.
Driving back and forth still must get old
when there’s work to get done, but it’s cold
that they levee a tax
with one hand in your slacks
while the other steals monies that fold.
With their hands stealing monies that fold
and their mouths making promises old
we have nothing to do
but to get in a stew;
I've got nothing to buy up some gold!
If you’ve naught to buy gold, you’re in luck
for you’re most likely going to be stuck
with some old shiny rocks.
You’ll do better with stocks
paying dividends which you can pluck.
If the stock market crashes, your bucks
will be less than today, and it sucks
that we just cannot tell
if we'll fall in a well
and go down with the swans and the ducks.
You’ll get down from the ducks but not swans
and don’t mix them with geese on your lawns
or the yard-eggs you find
may get you in a bind
when you step in some smelly bon-bons.
If your bon-bons are smelly, choc-lit
isn't what they're made of, sure as spit,
so just leave them alone
'cause geese on the throne
grind an' splat all the stuff that they's et.
When geese splat all the stuff that they eat
on your grass all the worms have a treat
which will aerate the soil
so when spring comes your toil
will be less and your lawns are replete.
If you're pleating your lawn to impress
all your neighbors, I think your excess
goes so far o'er the pail
that you need to inhale
and enjoy the lawn's greening success.
A green lawn’s a success to enjoy
if the fertilizer you employ
has been treated and dried
before it is applied
or the smell of your grass will annoy.
If the smells of the asses annoy
tell the donkeys that you don't enjoy
the aromas that they
fill the air with; don't say
that each morning their backs you employ.
If employees are mourning their back
and they can’t take a break for a snack
then you’re a sorry boss
whom they all want to toss
in the shed by the dynamite shack.
Since the dynamite shack is a shed
when it rains, you can go there for bed;
but I hope you don't smoke
'cause you surely would croak
when it scatters your body and head.
If you shatter your body and head
you are probably better off dead
for wheelchairs or a crutch
will not help you too much
with your savings and you in the red.
If your savings account's in the red
you have taken a loan out instead
of the goals that you set;
you had better not bet
any more on the black, as I've said.
You have said, “Do not bet on the black!”
even if you’ve amassed a big stack
of nice multi-hued chips;
Lady Luck often slips
and the bouncers will throw you out back.
If you're bouncing, you'll throw up out back;
do you want trampoline heart attack?
As we mellow in age
we should try to be sage...
even parsley with thyme for the rack.
You have parcels of time in the rack
to alleviate pain in your back
from a spine which was bent
past its greatest extent
and your chiropractor was a hack.
If your doctor is having a hack
he should tell you that you can come back
when his cough's in control
and he can console
you for teeth that are covered with plaque.
If your teeth are all covered with plaque,
rot and pyorrhea will attack
until teeth have to be
saved by good dentistry
or you’ll get a new set that will stack.
If your books are all piled as a set
you will not have been reading, I'd bet
'cause the ones underneath
can't be reached, and your teeth
stacked beside them is poor etiquette.
Stacking teeth beside books is alright
and Mrs. Manners can sleep well at night
for she knows her cute smile
had set there for a while
until dental experts fixed her plight.
If your plight has been fixed by a driller
you have likely then heard from the biller
to send him some bucks
'cause his work was deluxe
and Collector is known as a killer!
A collector who kills all his prey
to prepare them for show or display;
pins and decapitates
species in dire straits
causing many extinctions each day.
If you want to extinguish each day
birthday candles that your cakes display
give an optional fan
that your technical man
will turn on so the child won't dismay.
If your child’s in dismay will you turn
on the lights in the hall? Let them burn
all the fears of the night
when their comforting light
scares the monsters which cause his concern.
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