Rictameter, Poetic form exercise Options

[JustDaniel]

Thankies, LorII!

Here's one on a much more serious, reflective note:

potter

reshapes his earth

immersing his spirit

into every nuance of touch

sometimes leaving inexplicable marks

unmerciful wheel spins questions

seemingly pointlessly

who controls this

potter

© Daniel J Ricketts 26 Oct 2003

Held Lightly by gravity, Daniel  

[JustDaniel]

I slept

without a stir

alone in my West Wing;

body’s Law and Order sacked me.

Such News frightened me awake but briefly,

whispering, You’ll doze off Tonight.

Good knight woke me this morn

offering a toast;

ice leapt.

© Daniel J Ricketts 06 Nov 2003

[Cleo_Serapis]

You are very clever and original with these Daniel!

Love 'em all!  :cheer:  :sings:  :wave:

Hugarooos!
~Cleo  :lovie:

[JustDaniel]

You are very clever and original with these Daniel!

Love 'em all!      

Hugarooos!
~Cleo  

Thankies, Ms Cleo!  I miss our occasional early morning exchanges... but alas I just am not around much for awile!  Waaaaaaaa!

Blossom
faded though fair
yet withered of a hope
only yesterday emblazoned
on opulently hued petals, fiery sweet
scents permeating a warm breeze,
now stale, acrid, hanging
from a tear-streaked
blossom.

© Daniel J Ricketts 22 May 2003

[Cleo_Serapis]

No worries - we're all so busy!

My PC FRIED yesterday at work at 1 PM. Our IS department hasn't been back since! LOL!

So, I am without a pc at work (been using Lindi's in the afternoon). I do HOPE they at least tell me what's up today! I've been SOOOOOO STRESSED at work (ask Lindi) on a project to go live on Monday (big deal at Bose, been the project manager on this one since April) - I finally see the light and POOF  - black screen syndrome! LOL!

At least it's at WORK and not our home pcs.

My advise nevertheless: Back up your data OFTEN!

I spy a poem coming on - my MUSE is stirring!

Catcha later!
Cleo  :pharoah:  :alien:

[JustDaniel]

No worries - we're all so busy!

My PC FRIED yesterday at work at 1 PM. Our IS department hasn't been back since! LOL!

So, I am without a pc at work (been using Lindi's in the afternoon). I do HOPE they at least tell me what's up today! I've been SOOOOOO STRESSED at work (ask Lindi) on a project to go live on Monday (big deal at Bose, been the project manager on this one since April) - I finally see the light and POOF  - black screen syndrome! LOL!

At least it's at WORK and not our home pcs.

My advise nevertheless: Back up your data OFTEN!

I spy a poem coming on - my MUSE is stirring!

Catcha later!
Cleo    

I surely don't want to get your back up, LorII!  So, get your back-up!

A muse

will stir ewe up;

it’s faun’d of satyrs too.

Can’t see the forest for the trees?

Well, don’t give up! Acorn is all I knead

to fill or sophic’ly reflect

upon a subject here

attempting to

amuse.

© Daniel J Ricketts 07 Nov 2003

deLightingly, Daniel  

[JustDaniel]

Death’s Blind Faith


“No Death?”

Eye’d move away

to sense reel  life… apart

from God, who’d better save His Breath.

No guilt… I’d feel exhilaration’s thrill to fly

on eagle’s wing… then realized

too late… without His wind

I’m fallin’… Oh

no! Death.


© Daniel J Ricketts 23 Nov 2003

[Athena]

Capricious March

Blowing
wind carresses
the trees making sea sounds
nudging debris into ravines
completely out of sight, so we're left
beauties of slow arriving spring
one day cool the next warm
one still, next one
blowing

© D R Harris - 12 February 2004

(Well, I'm still new to rictameters ... they'll get better ... I hope)  

[heartsong7]

I was turned on to this form a few days ago. This is my first. Mine will usually have meter and rhyme.

Gardener

Lush lawns
like emeralds
surround a sapphire gem
whereon the windblown ripplets run
and reach as if to capture beams of sun.
The music of the morning has begun.
As songbirds sing for him,
he starts to mow
lush lawns.

[JustDaniel]

Excellent piece, Sue...

please forgive my response:

Guardin’ ‘er

rush in
to lounge upon
his lucioius carpet green
more plush than I have ever seen
then furtively we’ll slip away, dive in
to cool ourselves until that mean
old gard’ner comes to bean
us; watch that fool
rush in

© Daniel J Ricketts 13 July 2004

[heartsong7]

Amazing...How in the world do you do that so quickly...and well?
I'm speechless
with awe,
Sue

[JustDaniel]

rictametric key

the key
to everything
is choosing that first line
anticipating how you'll close;
the rest will come to you, if patiently
you plod along not fearing how
you'll lock the door behind
because you have
the key

© Daniel J Ricketts 13 July 2004

[heartsong7]

Loving
hands caress her,
coaxingly undress her,
and stroke her cheek to still a tear.
While nibbling on the soft lobes of her ear,
he scoops her up and off to bed,
his sweet words in her head
for a night of
loving.

He leaves
before the dawn,
packs up and travels on
and never even says goodbye.
She sees him go but barely bats an eye,
for in the evening every day,
he wanders back her way
before, once more,
he leaves.

[JustDaniel]

Well, young lady, whoever you are...

you have marvellously captured the essence of rictameter.

I bow to your prowess!

deLightingly, Daniel  :sun:

[Guest_Cathy_*]

 Twilight to Dawn        

                                             Twilight
                                     fades with the dawn,
                                  bright yellows and roses
                                ascending o'er the horizon
                            announcing the arrival of new day.
                                 Captive stars in dark night
                                     bring sweet serenity.
                                          Gaze upon
                                            Twilight
                                             

[JustDaniel]

Twilight to Dawn

Twilight
fades with the dawn
of bright yellow and rose
ascending o'er horizon's mourn
announcing arrival of a new day.
This beauty is so different
from night's serenity
with sparkling stars
that lay captive
Twilight

Write Wright

To right
un-centered piece
do not forget that words
like of and the do not belong
as line-ends on a tight rictameter.
Select two sounds you want
to start as well as end
then just proceed
to write.

© MLee Dickens’son 15 Nov 2004

[Guest_Cathy_*]

I've changed it, does it qualify now?  lol

Thanks Daniel for pointing out my oops!  You did miss one though, I had too many lines in the last half!
                                               :jester:
Cathy
         :lovie:

[JustDaniel]

I've changed it, does it qualify now?  lol

Thanks Daniel for pointing out my oops!  You did miss one though, I had too many lines in the last half!
                                               
Cathy
         

Your revision seems pretty good to me... though I've always found it helpful to others reading such a thread as this, to quote the original so that learners can see the progress of our own learning.  That sort of thing always helps me, at least.  (I know we all learn in very different ways.)

And you're quite right; I did not count the syllables or the lines, and you slipped that in on BOTH of us, it seems... but you get the last laugh about your last half!

Those words (not your laughing at me, because I certainly don't sense that!) have mused another rictameter!  Here goes:

a good guffaw

last laugh,
it's said, laughs best
by those who seem to know,
but if it's at someone’s expense
who's not agreed up front to pay the tab,
I've found it much more apropos
to (with some subtlety)
let them have it...
last laugh

© MLee Dickens'son 15 Nov 2004

sLightly deviously, Daniel  

[Cleo_Serapis]

Give thanks
for our blessings
received in bountiful
doses from near and far by friends
who touch all with a cornucopia
of generosity and love
laced with just the right blend
of spice so nice
Give thanks

[Cleo_Serapis]

.
. .
. . .

Snow falls
serenading
whipped cream dollops dancing
in freckled white powdered sugar
sprinkled with a dash of nutmeg spices
glazing picturesque scenery
on marshmallow bi-ways
tinted cocoa
snow falls

. . .
. .
.