Dark Piper, poem about Andre Nortons book Dark Piper Options

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

These were written shortly after readin Andre Nortons Dark Piper,, for the first time back in 1967 my Junior year of high school. Please keep that in mind when critiquing...LOL.


Requiem for a Piper

Piper blowing search the scale,
Float your music on a windy gale.
Caress your tones pipe them well,
Sing a song and weave your spell.
Traveling minstrel string your lute
Come and join with the piper’s flute.
Strum your mandolins golden strings
Play the songs that the morning brings.
Play for us the lusty and bold,
Then play the ballads sad and old.
Minstrel, piper play out your hearts
Show us your beauty before you part.
Piper sweet piper, play me a tune
Piper poor piper what have they done.
Too well have you played gone is your soul,
Now whispering winds are piping your call.
Minstrel, minstrel where are your strings,
Strung between harps and angel wings.
Come piper, come troubadour give one last song,
Play for us sweetly help us belong.

Wind Widows Waltz

Wind widow wind widow,
Fly with the breeze.
Laugh at the sun,
Cry on the trees.

Wind widow wind widow
Your piper has fled
Follow him softly
Mourn him when dead.

Wind widow wind widow
Whisper his songs.
Whistle his tunes
For words don’t belong.

Wind widow wind widow
Cry out in vain.
Shed not your tears,
Just remember his name.

Wind widow wind widow
Blow away free.
Fade away softly,
In sweet reverie.

Lament for the Piper

Softly, softly piper walk
Gently, gently minstrel talk,
As you wander further on,
With voices raised in simple song.
Piper, minstrel with nothing to do,
Minstrel, piper where are you?
Piper, away with your pipes,
Minstrel put away your mandolin.
Tread the myriad stars into the night,
Through golden gates and pass within.
Piper, minstrel play one last song
Show us please where you have gone,
Tell us please, that we do belong.

[Guest_Toumai_*]

Hi Steve

I am quite fascinated by this. I don't recall the plot to Dark Piper, though I think I must have read it in my teens as I was an ardent fan of Andre Norton - my first "discovery" of sci fi was reading Star Rangers (darn - may have had a different title in the States?) aged about nine: it had a huge impact.

I shall return for another read and proper crit when I have more time

Thanks

Fran

[Cyn]

Piper sweet piper, play me a tune
Piper poor piper what have they done.
Too well have you played gone is your soul,
Now whispering winds are piping your call.
Minstrel, minstrel where are your strings,
Strung between harps and angel wings.
Come piper, come troubadour give one last song,
Play for us sweetly help us belong.


Love these lines in your first poem!

The second poem flows beautifully and leads right into the last.

Your use of repitition works very well in these in my opinion. Wonderful piping quality
Cyn

[Merlin]

Hi Steve,

I remember the mid 60's and on, that was when the Space Odessey was happening.  There were many different types of pipers around too - even if I never got into puffing on them.  What colors there were!

Good on ya.

Merlin

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Fran it has been a long time since i read it also, don't remember wether it had a british publication or not, I know I bought a lot of my books at british book stores. I look forward to your analisis.
Steve

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Cyn thaks for your reading and kind words and comments.

Merlin, yes many types of pipes and many many colours. Lots of good freinds and fantastic music and times and memories.

[Guest_poeticpiers_*]

I am not familiar with the book but recognise the theme as originating in the old myths and legends from many countries. The goat God Pan and his pipes can still be heard in the quiet places far from the haunts of men
I enjoyed the form as well as the content  ivor

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Thank you Ivor for the kind words and comments.
steve

[jgdittier]

Dear Steve,
My comments are more general than most.
I assume this was written while you were still a teenager.
That says to me you must have been the star of your English class.
I imagine most of us whose star is now fading would have been proud to claim this one.
I like my poetry to be rhythmic and yours is, especially in that you've
written primarily in trochaic meter. I believe accent on the first beat of the line adds verve and has served you well. It breaks down some near the end.
I think it would be helped by fully punctuating it. That helps the reader read it the way you intended the first time.
In that you wrote it song-like, you've produced the feel of a song, a real accomplishment if you were still a beginner.
Be pleased too of your fine choice for a title and how well you've embellished the message with wistful yet clear terms like minstrel and troubadour.

I would post further comment right here in verse if I knew you
had no qualms about my doing so. However, for now, please consider
"Poetry for Progeny" to be further comment to you.

Nicely done and cheers,   Ron   jgd