Dead Man Walking, Pre-Obituary Reflections Options

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© Todd Congreve, 2006. I, Todd Congreve, do assert my right to be identified as the author of this work in accordance with Sections 77 and 78 of The Copyrights, Designs And Patents Act, 1988. (Laws of Cymru & England, as recognised by international treaties). This work was simultaneously copyrighted in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and the United States of America. This work is posted as an unpublished work in order to elicit critical assistance and other helpful comment, only.

Hi all, this is the first in an occasional series I hope to write (may be the only one!) on politics. It is not fiction - well, any more than politics is! It is not posted for crit per se, rather for discussion. However, as my previous political series was just over twenty years ago ("Contory College"), any feedback on the writing would be appreciated - I must be very rusty! If you feel better if I specify a niche this is journalism - though future posts may cross to satire more than this does. Please also feel free to agree / disagrree or comment on the points raised. (N.B. This was written between 02:00 and 10:00 this morning and - to Ver AC - has not been proofed etc, save for a couple of minor changes. The Version AD incorporates quite a few changes - thanks Fran for the comments about problems. Cheers, J.

Ref: TC ???? AD

Dead Man Walking
by TC

Polished knives glint in Spring's faltering sunshine. One could be forgiven for thinking they might have battle honours embossed on their blades, 1990 - Battle of Tumbledown Thatcher being the most prominent. But unlike the Conservatives of yore, many modern Labour MPs are only too proud to beat their chests on television, crying 'it will be me what does it.' The have obviously forgotten my parents' generation mantra: Pride comes before a fall.

As Thatcher, Blair has never lost a General Election (in fact, he won his latest only twelve months ago, with a big majority in traditional terms) . As with her, he has turned-round an unelected rabble (perhaps even more so - Labour were out of power from 1979-1997) and made them a multi-election winning combo. As Thatcher, Blair has taken his party from languishing on its left wing to unimagined success on a right wing it never knew existed. And as Thatcher then, Blair now appears patronizingly ignorant of current electors' concerns. So, what happened to the good ship Blair - and all who sail in her? Why are they cruising for a bruising?

It all begun with the New Labour election victory of May, 1997. As with everything organic, political success starts to die, as it is born. When Mr Blair stepped over No.10's threshold for the first time as Prime Minister, wholesome family by his side, he had made no mistakes; blotted no copybooks; thrown no stones in the greenhouse which is the Office of Prime Minister. By the end of the first day he had started to write his story in history - but with writing comes the inevitability of smudging and blotting. We are all-too familiar with those ink splats. Electors look at the pattern and see not delicate, beautiful butterflies, rising from the ashes of past failures, but pupils horrendously over-tested in over-targeted schools; they see billions of pounds of their money poured into health care and the results - some waiting lists cut (but non-targeted lists growing), GPs, with enormously hiked salaries, no longer offering out-of-hours services, hospital doctors and nurses sacked - because hospitals have insufficient discretionary cash after Government targets have been met, and a transport system to die for (well, some Blair minister ought to pay the ultimate price).

Oh, yes, and there is the small matter of Iraq. In one crazy policy, Blair lied to the British people (let us be charitable and say unintentionally - though lies on this magnitude have to count as intentional). He also gave greater credibility to the US neo-Cons' determination to destroy the Iraqi regime, as part of its trumped-up fight against the axis of evil. There are several ironies here. One being that many voices in the US military and neo-Cons (not always the same group) are now calling for a quick escape (the concept of a managed exit strategy having long-since been sold down the Euphrates). Another irony is that the UK can no longer offer the US any veneer of political credibility for future operations, as Blair's Utopia is seen globally as being almost as morally bankrupt as its far more powerful ally. Domestically, enhanced terrorism-target and dead troops apart, the UK would almost be inclined to lynch Blair if he tried to assist the US in over-turning another regime (Iran or North Korea seem on the Bush Food Global Menu). But then again, any attempt to join Bush at one of those feasts would see enough Brutus figures emerge from the Cabinet, let alone the Parliamentary Labour Party (PLP), to ensure that all the public could lynch was a political corpse.

So we have a record of failed promises and administrative incompetence (Gordon Brown excepted - he has been a brilliant Chancellor, so long as you don't run a small business mummified in red tape, nor have a company pension). Throw-in a juicy sexual epi-sod-e: Ron Davies' momentary lapse of heterosexuality on Clapham Common. And, of course, Mr Prescott's in-office, in-house and in-goodness-knows-where, affair with his diary secretary. Mind you, that may have gained as many male voters as it lost females ones. Now, add another Brown - the ex minister in the ex Department of Ag, Fish and Foods - failed to speedily deal with the Foot and Mouth Crisis. Peter Mandleson and David Blunkett both resigned, were re-appointed and re-sacked. Patricia Hewitt was booed by Nurses at their recent Spring conference - a terrible thing. They had her there and were too nice to do more than simply make noises. Watch it nurses! Mr Clark and his colleagues have released all those foreign murders, rapists and others (perish the thought we should send them back to peril in their own lands) - be good now, New Labour knows where you live! (It has to - it needs to post your redundancy notices).

These and several other problems, too boring to mention or remember, mean that Blair has a recipe to accompany Bush's main course, at any dinner to celebrate how crap politics can be. So, like any top chef, when the going gets tough, Blair part-sacked and part re-arranged his Kitchen Cabinet. Does that make Blair a knight of the long knives or a pesky tooth-pick prodder?

After the day of the brutal reshuffle, we have a new cabinet. But that is all well and good. A cabinet has to have internal and external integrity and that depends on its fixings. With Brown forcing one way and Blair another it is a body under great Labour stresses before it even tries to tackle any UK problems. Of course, there is Mr Fixer - John (No jobs) Prescott. Mind you, the Tory top-tier bleating about the scandal of paying Prescott and throwing in a ministerial car and houses is pure hypocrisy. One suspects they would pay from their own funds to keep this show going a little longer - every passing farcical day hastens the next Conservative Government. Every Crazy Gang moment allows Blair and his Party to further un-stick the cabinet. Watch out now, that deceptively nice Mr Cameron and his team are taking the broken pieces and making New Labour's coffin (which will have sponsored by Old Labour stamped on its inside.

In his Cabinet dealings - as in so many things now - Blair is politically impotent: politics' Dead Man Walking.

TC, 10/05/2006.