Don't be fooled, Daniel. They're only after me candy stash. Too bad for them I et it all up and have been in a sugar induced coma ever since. Ugh. And that was showing up, not throwing up, right? Well, heck...either way...

Hi There Thorley. I thorley hope you enjoy yourself here. (People will probably warn you about me. Pretty safe to believe them.)

Hi C! (Get it? Hi C? Oh, I crack myself up!)

Hi ya!

And here I thought I just had the barfy flu. All the time, it was just a reaction to your stinky poetry! LOL! Yeah, my big white oversized glow in the dark patootey! Talk about false modesty, Miss Super Poet! THBBBBPPPPTTTT! You should know by now that my green pallor is from JEALOUSY! Neener!

BTW, your rev is great! Now everything is nice and tight and super potent. Just like you like your boys! Wicked laugh!

Well, my Dearest, I gots ta run and pick up a Pee-Wee from kindergarten. I'll try to come back and wreak some havoc just so as you won't be lonely!

BIGGEST HUG!
Nef

PS Your poem reminds me of me 'cept I'm not a boy and I'm NOT DEAD YET (in my best Monty Python impersonation)!!!

Hel-roh Everybody!

Rwow! You guys really know how to make a cold dead mummified body feel welcome!!!

Now, was far as where I've been and what I've been up to, NOT TELLING! Nope, you tan't make me! THbbbbpt!!! And, Mr. Daniel, Sir, what a lovely owed, I mean, ode but I think miscreant sticks like glue! Just ask ANYBOdY@! LOL!

And, yes, heed's Amethyst (who will ALWAYS be Relli to me) - touch my & 's and DIE Foolish Mortals! DIE!

I tan't promise I'll actually write anything (I'm pretty much stickin' to lyrics and then, not even doin' much there - DUH!) but I sure tan make tings messy 'round these here parts! Yea -ha! (Having an attack of multiple personalities. Evidently, it's hereditary.)

Whall, y'all have a great day and thanks so much fer stoppin' by ta give me a howdy-do! Now, I'm off to raid my kids' Halloween candy before they get home from school. My BaD!

HUGS!

Hello My Relli!

Well, I must say that the temporary rev is pretty awesome! The original piece was good, but you've taken it up a level or two with the changes. You are always so potent in your verbage. I give homage to the master!

BIGGEST HUGS!

Miscreant Me

Hey Cleo!

I'm basically critless on this one. Typical Cleo genius! (How's that for a little hinney kissin'?)

And I LOVE the avatar!

Dis my favorite time of year!

WHOOPPEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi!  You have some utterly (I'm trying REALLY HARD NOT TO SAY UDDERLY!!! LOL!  ) awesome imagery in this piece!  I love your opening and closing stanzas!  Highly romantic and relatable.  I really like how you juxtaposed the dream walk with the harsh reality of farm life and winter.  Nicely done.  No real crits that I can see from me! And I think the sky can shine.  It gets all glowy depending on the light - espeically the harsh winter light.  I think I would like to walk in places of leaves and time.  (I adore autumn - especially crunching the leaves!  )  :D

Great piece!  I like it!

B.

Hi!  

I really enjoyed this piece.  It has a great feel to it.  Nostalgic without being overly sentimental.  I thoroughly related to it.  Well conveyed and nicely done!  Okay, now I'll take an anemic crack at a crit for you.  Mostly, I just beg for commas!


Drifting days that once were mine,(Nice opening! )
When I was young and free.  (This thought seems incomplete - I expect to be lead somewhere wonderful and find a period instead.  Maybe a comma that leads to the next line and a period at the end of that one.)
I watched over your meadows green  (Okay, maybe a period wouldn't work here because this line seems to be tied to the next one.)
A lingering moment that was gone too quickly,("too quickly gone" perchance?)
I turned my eyes toward distant fields,
And pushed my feet down a different path.
Now I sit with memories, watching younger
Fools pass your (Where did your come from?  Should the tense be "my" or how about "this"?) way
They’re in their drifting days. (Love the way you pulled that together.)

Drifting days that once were mine (comma, please)
I wandered through them casually (Semi-colon if the thought on the line is tied to the next or period if it isn't.)
Picking out to place in mind
Vivid memories, they have no place or time (period - I get LOST without puncutation.)
Contented moments in quiet solitude,
Rushing interludes that sweep the dusty cobwebs
Stirring the lingering aftertaste of the presence
Of your warmth,
That is molded in the background of my mind.



This is really a beautiful piece.  I hope I didn't butch it with my crit.  It's resoundingly lovely!  Thanks for the read!

B.

Hey!

This is massively impressive!  You really developed this extrodinarily well! Very intreguing premis.  Great use of vocab.  While long, it does not lose interest.  Very thought provoking.  And, being on the borderline of germaphobia, I'm off to thoroughly wash my hands when I'm finished here! EEEK!

I have some minor crits - mostly just little punctuation thingies that are the kinda thing that makes me happy. If you don't like 'em, just pretend I'm your spouse and ingore me! LOL!  Hope they help.





I truly know that I exist
but what I am, I do not know.
I will continue, I insist
I have to live, I have to grow.

Generated in the putrid slime
of cess pits far below the earth,.(lose the period)
I had to come it was my time.
Perchance I was a virgin birth.

I know to live I must needs eat
and absorb all I come across.
With every living thing compete.(same as above - comma & chuck the period)
Each meal I gain, another’s loss.

I gain much more from meals than food(dash or comma - your choice)
I gain the contents of a mind.
My  present state of knowledge, crude.(semi-colon?  The thought seems incomplete to me.)
But who knows what next I will find.

At last I reach the light of day.(lose the period)
Where the small animals abound
and gladly on them I will prey.
Each meal brings knowledge I have found.

To gain more knowledge I ingest
small mammals who’re afraid of me
Their higher minds add interest.
I know that they use eyes to see(Now I want a period)

Now I decide that I must rest
and classify my memories.
I put my knowledge to the test,
develop three eyes easily.

These mammals have four legs to move.
Whilst I just ooze along the ground,
I search within my treasure trove
and I grow legs with which to bound.


I can seek now for larger prey
But I must do so carefully.
Conspicuous by the light of day (comma please)
my growing size easy to see.

I fear no foe of my own size(a dash, perhaps?)
They don’t know how to deal with me,
they’re dead before they realise.
I pick their brains clean instantly.

Then suddenly I cannot see (a dash, perhaps?)
the light has gone I don’t know why.
I lie in wait defensively
I have more thoughts to classify.

I learn facts from my random store(comma please)
understand the loss of light
and know that morning will restore
the faculty I have of sight.

Instinctively I know to hide
from man (comma please)my greatest enemy.
The minds I have absorbed inside
have made that very clear to me.

So warily I watch and wait
there is so much for me to learn.
As slowly my thoughts percolate
I must examine each in turn.

I gather man is powerful
and that his species rule the earth.
He will present an obstacle
to overcome and prove my worth.

I do not have a name as yet.
But I am certain I’m the one
that creatures see and don’t forget.
I instil fear I am unknown.

I can now change my shape at will,
appear to be what I am not.
I can quickly adapt my skill,
faster than the speed of thought.

I must consume a living man
absorb his mind while it is whole.
I have no doubt at all I can.(This phrase is a bit akward to me.  I'm not quite catching what your'e trying to convey. Sorry.)
I do so and I taste his soul.

A flavour that is new to me
but one I find that I enjoy.
I test it analytically,
I discover it was a boy.

A junior member of the race
who has not reached maturity.
but still my knowledge grows apace.
I know enough to guarantee.

This world is mine alone to rule
I will absorb them one by one.
They are not difficult to fool
so I will feast til they are gone.

I like the name the boy called me,
his final words before he died(Now I want a period)
In terror he called "God help me"
and now I have him safe inside.

I learn that God’s omnipotent,
all powerful and in control.
Which closely mirrors my intent,
to rule this world (comma please)my final goal.

My name is God, soon men will know
that I have come to take their place.
Their time is up (comma please)they have to go
to make room for a greater race.



At present I am singular
but I can multiply at will.
My fluid form crepuscular(comma please)
I have the knowledge and the skill.

Though you may fight you cannot win(dash)
this battle you are sure to lose.
I am the first born of my kin,
your time is drawing to its close.

You’re easy to identify(dash)
to you I am a mystery.
Accept your fate(comma) prepare to die(dash)
it’s foreordained(comma) it has to be.

Hey Lori!

Sadly, I did not eat a whole bunch of yummy cookies.  I've been toosick.  But I'm finally starting to feel a bit human so I've raided the stocking candy.  Reese's minis.  A HUGE downfall for me!  So much for all the weight I lost being sick! LOL!  I'll just have to dream about yummy cookies! LOL!

I'm glad my meagre suggestions helped!  You have the  happiest New Year!  And if you don't see me for awhile, it's cuz 'm beating my head against the wall trying to buy something on ebay for My Dramam Queen! LOL!

Big Hugs,
B.

Hey Mary!

Welcome!  Sorry to be so tardy with this.  It's that time of year! lol!  How exciting to have an editor here!  I'm looking forward to your noise!  :D

See ya 'round!
Nef
aka
Beth

Congrats Cathy!  I'm so happy for you.  Sorry I didn't get here sooner.  Sadly, I've been extremely ill but trying my best to stay out of the hopsital.  Have teh merriest Christmas EVER!

Big Hugs,
B.

Awe, Relli!  You gots a heart of gold!  (I"m actually rooting for you to win, of course!  You are so deserving and maybe you could hire a maid for a day with the $50 so you can stop all that scrubbing and write more of your loverly poetry!

You the bestest ever and I'm so happy you my friendiepoo!

Big Baby Talk Hugs,
Rotten Ol' Me!

Hey circumsolar!

Thanks for the crit.  I so know what you mean.  It IS hard keeping the vocab childish.  (I never have a problem keepng my behavior childish, though!)  Well, I think I'll give this thing a thorough going over and see if I can't obliterate any "BIG" words! LOL!  And even up the meter.  Right now, things at home are a little too grown-up for me to induldge my childish self, sadly.  

I truly appreciate your advice and your time and your kind words.  So, therefore, I promise not to throw a snowabll at you right now.  (I'll wait until you're not looking!:p )

Thanks again for everything!

Hugs,
B.

Whal, Marcia, that she-devil if a mother-in-law be cross-eyed as a drunken monkey in a liquor shop n' she tends ta wear mini shorts that be a couple sizes too smal fer her. She dun died her gray hair blond and her arse is the size of a buick pick-up.  An ifn't ye shoot the wrong in-laws, it's doubtful ye'll hear any complainin'!

An, ya knows, fer all yer faults, yer still a gud nebbor!  Yer more n welcome ta any old squirrel I gots and ye kin evin come overta Chrissmus and have some o that thar possum wit me!  Bring yer own moonshine, though.

OH boy, we is bad, ain't we?  Whall, ifn that woman tweren't so ignorant and ornery, I'd have no problem wit her.  But she is and I aint' got no patience wit that type o' thinkin'!  (Or lack there of, as the case may be! LOL!)

Well, Marcia,  I think we've beaten that into the ground!!! LOL!  You have some fun and don't et up any squirrels that ere foamin' at the mouth!

Big Hugs,
B.

Awe, Relli!

Nobody kisses hineey like you do! LOL!  You give hte bestest compliments ever!  I'm so glad you be my firned!

Thank you!

BIggest Hugs,
B.

Whal, seein' as it tis Crimuss n' all, I 'spose I kin overlook a squirrel er two jest best stay 'way from them thar possum or I ain't be havin' no Crismuss supper at my shack!  Now, if yer keen on it, mebbe I kin even give ya a squirrel er two ifn' ye'd point that ol' shot gun at the mean ol' rottin' shrew of a muther-in'tlaw I got me.  Then I'd see my way straight ta give ya all the squirrels ya culd ever dream of!  I give ya me word on that!  I"d be o' like mine ta do the same ta yers ifn' ya need me to!

Oh, best stop now before I get myself into some real trouble, Marcia! LOL!  I"m sure you've seen that forwarded email about removing the stains from killing the mother-in-law.  Well, I printed that one up and framed it! LOL!

You have yourself a Merry Little Christmas and let your heart be light!

Big Hugs,
B.

I tell ya Sylvia, that Lori...:D  She seems all meek, mild and sensitive on the surface - writing such lovely things and taking such pretty photos - but deep down.....:D   She eggs me on.  Enough said! LOL!

Big Hugs,
B.

Why, thank ya, Sylvia!  I betcha I'm the only New York born and bread red-neck y'all'll ever come across in yer lifetime! LOL!  And that lives in Californiiii-aaaa ta boot! yea ha!  

Big Hugs,
B.

Gee, thanks Sylvia!  You're making my head swell up!  Now, as far as 2 in the finals, I can only blame that on Lori's penchant for warped humor!  There is no accounting for taste! LOL!

Thanks Sylvia and have a great holiday season!

Big hugs,
Beth

Why thank ye kindly, Marcia!  I knowed this dun brought out tha inner red-neck in ya, didn't it? LOL!  I'm working on a piece whining about my rotten in-laws and how they ruin Christmas! (I think I did one like that a couple years ago, too, but it's MIA. Hmmmm, hubster may have destroyed the evidence! LOL! ) Oh, there is no end to the kinda trouble I can get into when I start letting stuff outta my head!   I think my red-hair is a way of warning people of danger if they come too close! LOL!

Whall, y'll have a grand ol' daddy o' a holiday season and quit yer poachin' squirrel offa my land! Ya hear?

Big Hugs,
B.

Hey Merlin!

Yeah, I've been told that I'm touched a lot!!!  My greatest anticipation is waiting until my kids are teens so I can embarrass the hell outta them! LOL!:D   OH the joy and retribution to be had!  Thanks for your kindly words and taking the time to read my nonsnese! LOL!

And the same goes for you,  circumsolar!  Thansk for the read and comment to let me know you cared enough to suffer through! LOL!

Hope you both have a great holiday season!  My goal is to catch up to Mrs. Claus in cookie consumption.:D

Hugs,
B.

Hey Marcia!

Thanks a gazillioin!  LOL!  Yeah, that Lori!  If it weren't for her, I'd given up writing completely!  This is the 2nd time she's yanked me outta retirement! LOL!  So, any and all blame for my spewings shall be placed upon her head! LOL!

Big Hugs,
B.