Limerick, Poetic Form Exercise Options

[Larry]

She’ll be mad but the food must be checked
and the order she brings won’t reflect
on her skill. It’s the cook
who will be on the hook
for lost tips and he may wind up decked!

[JustDaniel]

Any cook stays inside can't be decked.
Should they inside the kitchen connect
he would use his great spoon
and attacker would swoon
from concussion, as one would expect.

[Larry]

If the cook’s not expecting a flood
of mad waitresses out for his blood
when the food he’s prepared
leaves the customers scared
that his ladle is dishing up crud!

[JustDaniel]

If the cook's ladle's dishing out crud
won't be long ere his name will be mud
and his restaurant will fail
Reputation will sail
to obscurity's hell, as it should

[Larry]

In obscurity’s hell one should wear
a name tag so that everyone there
will know just who you are
but that won’t get you far
‘cause no one in that hell gives a care.

[JustDaniel]

It is clear no one there gives a damn
because everyone's failed their exam
They've been damned and they know
they have nothing to show
and they've all heard the prison gate slam.

[Larry]

When the prison door slams in their face,
of remorse; there’s not even a trace.
With their mouths full of lies
it is not a surprise
they can’t ask for forgiveness and grace.

[JustDaniel]

Ask forgiveness as you're saying grace
when your apple pie has too much mace;
let your customers know
you're related to Poe
so you'll do that again Nevermore!

[Larry]

Nevermore! A lim’rick without rhyme?
Even Poe has to know that’s a crime.
So with tongue out of cheek,
I don’t think ravens speak
‘cause their caws cause confusion sometime.

[JustDaniel]

Please forgive me for my sad mistake.
My Lim'rick sticks out like a drake
who go lost in a bog
He knew he couldn't jog
and was too tired to fly to a lake.

[Larry]

When the drakes fly to lakes in the spring
they all hope to find hens for a fling
so avoid hunter’s guns
and decoys; the fake ones
or wind up a’ l’Orange or Peking

[JustDaniel]

Peeking duck shot right out of the tree
where he perched ever so foolishly
I was standing nearby
and my hat went awry
but I grabbed it before it fell free.

[Larry]

I’m not sure if you speak of your hat
or the duck caught before it went splat.
Shooting ducks in a tree
is an anomaly
and you must have a license for that.

[JustDaniel]

Ducks do not need a license to splat
on the ground if they're Peking and fat;
they like lofting in trees
'cause the height somehow frees
them of all regulations. That's that!

[Larry]

That there’s some regulation that frees
any duck that is roosting in trees
from biology’s facts
that all web-footed lacks
claws that grip in their anatomies.

[JustDaniel]

anatomical grips are a lack
for the tree-lofting birds that go quack
but they really don't care
as they sit there and stare
all around, up and down, front and back!

[Larry]

All around, up and down I did search
for a duck that might roost on a perch
but alas, none were found;
they all sit on the ground.
To persist, I’d be left in a lurch.

[JustDaniel]

Ah, my friend, you have searched the wrong tree.
Here that duck on a branch you would see.
It is right over there
where it sits with a stare.
Don't stand under, 'cause oft it will pee.

[Larry]

That’s not pee and the duck’s made of glass
which I’ve used for a joke. It’s a gas!
It’s simply a decoy
that I’ve plumbed and employ
with a timer to water the grass.

[JustDaniel]

He who waters his grass with a duck
won't be one who'll be earning a buck.
Who would do such a thing?
May as well stand and sing
on the corner with "Cluck, Cluck, Cluck, Cluck!"