A Time to Dance, left-right-left Options

[Merlin]

Greetings Friends & Neighbors,
My days for critique are basically over, both in the giving and getting. I have no appetite for either, so it's seldom you see me up in Herman's Hairpit. If there are any readers down here, I may post a few.
Here's a sonnet I did recently.
Merlin


Dancing in the Rain

It was a time for dancing in the rain,
a time to leave the nest and fly alone;
a time for cheese ‘n crackers with champagne;
a time to move my dial off monotone.
It was a time when Cupid’s arrow hit
the pair of us – we didn’t stand a chance.
Impossible another one could fit
as perfectly as us. What a romance!

A wandering star out in the universe
kept beckoning; I couldn’t fight its call.
Farewells are never easy, but my curse
is nomad blood. We parted late one fall.

As time has hastened down its steep abyss,
those golden years are what I mostly miss.

[Guest_ohsteve_*]

Merlin, Very nice my friend, yes it seems the golden years are memories of the past, definitely not these ones now, these are all rusty...lol. Thanks for sharing this.

Steve

[Merlin]

Hi Steve,
Good of you to look in and comment.

Yes, looking back is interesting often.

Merlin

[Sekhmet]

Good morning Merlin.
I must admit that I have never visited , 'Herman's Hair-pit' - so I was saddened to discover on my first visit that you no longer have the taste for critting or writing. I always enjoy your irreverent comments; so don't be a stranger!
Leo

[Cleo_Serapis]

Hi Eric and welcome to Plato's Pearls!

It's certain been a while since you've posted with us and I really enjoy your sonnets! I really felt the emotion behind this one. I'm not certain in your opening what 'time' you speak of, whether it's the narrator now dead, or their love, or where their former life together is now being recalled (golden years) but I like the transitions you've made from line to line. The closing couplet (what do you call that again in a sonnet?), certainly tells me it's recalling the past and the yearning to be with that lover.

A wandering star out in the universe
kept beckoning; I couldn’t fight its call.
Farewells are never easy, but my curse
is nomad blood. We parted late one fall.

This part is what confuses me - I want to think it is symbolic of Death calling (the star) or it could be that the MC has found another lover?

Do tell!
~Cleo

[Merlin]

Thank you Leo & Cleo,

Your replies are appreciated, and the moreso since down here, activity isn't as it is upstairs. Perhaps we can generate some interest here.

Leo, ya just never know where I pop up. As to the crit thing, I reckon I did my share of it and now simply allow what is, "to be". I've also moved into the open form realm, which is probably more difficult to critique since the writer makes his/her own limits. There are no missing or excess feet to catch - that sort of thing.


Lori, I've been on the nostalgia theme for a bit. This one begins with the young leaving home and becoming independent, going thru the feast & famine cycles, falling in love, and moving on. It's those glorious years of our youth, and those are the ones best remembered.
As is often the case, this is partly truth and partly fiction. It's a fact that I never was able to settle down in one place or at one job - have had several careers, including food & beverage (hotel), electrician (still am that), Realtor, and others along the way. I've moved my share and living 10 years in one place was a record. That's the reference to the nomadic blood and always being restless for no better reason than time to move on.
I didn't embed any deep meanings, but the other party is deceased. There can only be memories.
Heroic couplets >> but they should pack a big punch.


I'll need to look whether Plato is open to open form, now that I have a respectable handle on that stuff.

Merlin