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Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews _ ARCHIVES -> Short Form Poetry -> Shogun's Psalms _ Man From Cork

Posted by: Peggy Carpenter Harwood Mar 11 09, 10:22

Man From Cork

There once was a man from County Cork
Who loved a fair maiden from York.
He wrote her a letter.
Then they got together.
Now they are expecting the stork!

Peggy Carpenter Harwood

Posted by: Cleo_Serapis Mar 12 09, 05:33

Ha ha ha Peggy!

Too funny - enjoyed your limerick!

One little metrical bump with 'county' but not sure how to correct it?

Cheers
~Cleo

Posted by: ace Mar 12 09, 16:13

Peggy:

Agree with Cleo...both on the rhythm of line 1 but also on enjoying a good limerick.

ace

Posted by: Peggy Carpenter Harwood Mar 12 09, 17:39

Hi Cleo and Ace,

I'm glad you think this is funny! It's a bit cleaner than most limericks that we all know. I really can't change "county," so it will have to remain a bit flawed.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!

Peggy

Posted by: ace Mar 18 09, 16:59

Peggy:

You know, you are completely right to retain "county Cork"; too much context are contained therein. You might remove "once". Good as is, however.

ace

Posted by: Arnfinn Mar 19 09, 01:41

G'day Peg,

Very enjoyable and funny.

Pity about 'County', and trimeter.

Though, as you say, I don't think it detracts from the poem.

John