Printable Version of Topic

Click here to view this topic in its original format

Mosaic Musings...interactive poetry reviews _ Fixed Form and Rhyming Poetry for Critique -> Herme's Homilies _ One Rose

Posted by: Larry Jul 23 18, 15:07

One Rose

One tattered rose, yet beauty still remains;
reflecting in the tears of Nature’s grief
to mix with mine. Fate’s route of last refrains
has led me where my love now lies beneath

cold hallowed grounds. It must have fallen from
the myriad of flowers which now frame
white marble stone. Death’s feast has left a crumb
and I, with trembling hand and eyes aflame

retrieve a vestige of the coffin’s shroud.
Now cradled carefully lest petals fall
to carpet steps of dissipating crowd;
much like our wedding day. I will recall

the life we shared but always loathe the ache
of losing my sweet Rose when I awake.

Posted by: greenwich Jul 28 18, 14:27

Stanza 2 lines 1 and 3 are not rhyming couplets. Otherwise very enjoyable

Posted by: Larry Jul 31 18, 06:39

Hi Antony,

You are correct about the rhyme when it is read by folks "across the pond" and pronounce "from" like "prom" but being from the deep South in the states, I pronounced it like "frum" because that is the way most folks talk down here. Any suggestions on rectifying the rhyme? Let me know.

Thanks,
Larry