2008_1030FUJIfile0013.JPG ( 997.93K )
Number of downloads: 3I Know You Are up There
‘I know you are up there. You are in the open blue glimpse of cirrus.
Therefore, here’s my invitation to come down and shake my hand.
Yep! I have read and heard so much about you— mate; you can change
my life, overturn- a disgusting run of bad luck. My love life has hit
a bad patch; I’m well…not travelling too well in the financial stakes; he, he,
I bet you could change things with a couple of shakes of that ‘good
shepherds’ crook you’ve shoved down the back of your trousers.’
‘I mean for God’s sake! Oh, excuse me; ‘God’s sake’ is common
expletive down here. And I mean no disrespect. I’m truly calling upon
you to treat me as good loyal friends, which I am, mate’
‘Yesireeeeeeeeeeeeeee’
‘Mate— I love ya, when you were down here in AD you killed them with
kindness, turned the other cheek, had a water-fed winery and controlled
a monopoly on bread shops and fish markets, cured invalids, and were
into bush fires. One of your greatest— ya got rid of those taxing
bludgers, ya whipped the bastards. Oh, excuse me mate; ‘bastard’ is
another expletive and I understand the ‘B’ word is a delicate subject re:
‘the old man.’
‘Yeeeeeeeeha’
‘Now, I not asking for much— I’m not greedy. Nup! All I’m asking is to,
sort of; send an Emissary down with say… ten million American dollars
shoved in a backpack between his/her angelic wings. If you could see fit
to carry out this request, I’ll get all the boys at the ‘local’ this Friday, to
raise a glass and thank you for your generosity.’
Eh!
‘Hey! It is starting to rain damn it! The skies turning black; what the Hells
going on— oh, excuse me…
Bloody, excuse me, thunder and lightning; ‘oo’eer, it’s blowing a cyclonic
gale!’
‘Sorry your Lordship’
‘Jezzzezz, a dog just flew past dragging its chain…Cripes! I’ll have to
grab onto this bough or I’ll be blown to friggin Hell.’
Excuse me, excuse me. Hail Mary full of grace.’
Some-time later.
‘Ah, thank goodness the wind has abated. He, he, you didn’t catch
me out that time your Worship.’
‘Hey, it’s snowing? Hang on, that’s money; American hundred dollar
notes!’
‘YeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeHa’
Sitting in kitchen.
‘Whew! I’ve been up all night counting the loot-- I can’t believe it, ten million
American dollars!’
Thud!
‘What’s that?’
‘Oh, today’s newspaper flew in my sitting-room window. Oh my Gosh;
look at the headlines. ARMOURED CAR BLOWN OVER IN SNAP CYCLONE ‘
‘Hmm…Let me see.’
[Thursday 25th September, a ‘Thompson Express’ armoured car, on
Highway 21, travelling through Windsor, was blown over by a cyclonic
gale. The force of the impact was so severe that the vans rear security
doors buckled and flew open releasing a sum of American currency into
the atmosphere. A spokesman for the armoured car company’s
insurance underwriter, Alliance 1st National, said, ‘I am of the opinion
that the velocity of the wind was such— that the money will never be
recovered.]
‘Mate! You’ve done it. You’ve created another bloody Miracle! Come on
down mate— my friend—let me shake your hand. Let me introduce
you to all my mates at the boozer.’
‘I’ll be waiting… I know you are up there.’
John Macleod © 2010